ain't no suicide attempt thats been attempted that i ain't tried
i cut my wrists to watch them bleed just to pass the time
you wonder why this rhyme continues line after line
its cuz my thoughts are muddled from these hotrailed cocaine lines
in my brain i concoct stories of vicious coalitions
each one more malicious as you peruse every sentence
listen,don't think i'm not tempted to end this bitches
im content wit being bent wit a cigarette lit
none of ya'll could tell me i ain't the shit
let me tell you a story about life and its pain
what you know about sleeping outside in the rain
and they wonder why i spit wit venom screamin I HATE YOU
i'm down to do whateva it takes dude
i've finally snapped hear the gun pop sucide shots
barely survived five shots only to try and take my own life
i barely knew my father and my mother don't love me
why else would she cringe when she leans in to hug me?
life for me is far from lovely
in fact its grimy black and downright ugly

chorus:
these loose thoughts
have got my mind spinning
i take two shots
multiplyed by twenty
i don't know what to do god
you say lucifer's my enemy
but he keeps talking to me
acting real friendly

i play russian roulette wit a bullet in each chamber
i don't get scared i barely even care when my life is in danger
i sell smack smoked crack and drink pop bottles after strangers
i see demented demons teasing pushing towards anger
i cut myself and once tried to strangle myself wit a hanger
so ain't no way i'ma see something special about a baby born in a manger
i live in a dirty world where i barely exist
work a dead end job
and can't sleep without a fifth
so how can i open my heart and let god inside
when god won't even look me in the eye
pit church versus these curses and see which one'll end up hearting
i've survived attempted assisantion and spiritual murders
but don't tell me he is wit me
when i live on a block wit murderers lurking
merking anybody of whose identity is unceartin
but for now daeg ima close this curtain
fuck this song cuz pass me the bourbon

chorus:
these loose thoughts
have got my mind spinning
i take two shots
multiplyed by twenty
i don't know what to do god
you say lucifer's my enemy
but he keeps talking to me
acting real friendly