I bet mine's worse... Yesterday qualifies for one of the most fucked up nights i've ever had, and believe me, i've had A LOT of fucked up nights. So let me begin, my friends call me up like "yo the fuck you doing tonight?" So I say "Nothing right now, pretty bored, are you gonna take me out?" He says "Nope, I failed the drivers test so I got no liscence, we gotta stay in town tonight, we're going to McCaig and getting fucked up over there" That's when he hangs up and I hear my doorbell ring. I answer the door and there's my 4 good friends standing infront of the driveway holding two 24 cases. So I was like, noice! We went to McCaig and just downed beers and smoked the shit out of some semi-decent weed =\. Well a few hours later we're fucked up and my friend slaps my other friend as a joke for saying something stupid. So then my other friend slaps him for slapping him, so I slapped him. Then it just became a 2-on-2 tag team slap boxing match. Well I box anyways (provincial champ bitches!) and Matt is a big muh fucka, and decided he's gonna start boxing soon too. So whatever happens I nailed the first kid with a nice right slap and he was done, then we went and I was waiting for my friend to get his slaps in on the other guy cuz we don't do the 2-on-1 cheap shit, but then since I was waiting not paying attention he smacked me anyways got a nice shot too my lip was bleeding. So I go, ah fuck no bitch, it's 2-on-1 now. I think then we both somehow ended up on the pavemant cuz it transformed into a wrestling match. Well it's hard to slapbox when you're wobly/tipsy as fuck. So anyways, that was cool, then Matt pitches the idea of bare knuckling, so ofcourse i'm first to take the challenge. He got me with a nice body shot, but when he went for the head he'd throw predictable right hand leads. So I just moved out of the way came in and unleashed a flurry of hits. I think I got a nice jab, then a left hook, then a right uppercut, and then pounded his body. He clinched on me quick though and then pushed me off and threw a right hook right away that almost took my jaw off. Ya the left side of my jaw kills now. Well after that he stopped cuz he apparently had a rock in his foot, so i'm thinking "pussy" But then he takes his shoe off and there's a big fucking shard of broken glass from a bottle we chucked right through his shoe, and his sock was covered in blood. I gave him my house key to push the glass out, and then I somehow forgot to ask for it back. So when he left somewhere and I went home I had no fucking house key to get in. I went around biking for another hour trying to find him on the streets, even went to 7/11's that were open 24 hours so I could call his cell. Didn't work, I had to bike back home and pass out in my shed in the backyard. Then I wake up to the garage opening cuz my step-dad was going to work. So I casually got up, got out of the shed and walked into the garage, and he's like "Were you sleeping outside? What the hell, what's wrong with you, are you on drugs? That's not right, what the hell, go in and go to sleep" The whole time I was "................." then I walked in and went to sleep. And ya, now I have to go to work until late and I still don't have a key for when I get back so WTF?!

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I got smashed in the skull with a can of beans.

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somebody took a picture of me getting a shine job at a party.

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wow your friends are retarded
get ya keys back and make sure he aint make a copy of it
TRUST ME
a few years back a friend of mine made a copy of my house key (which i lost PLAY FIGHTING)
i didnt think nothing of it til
i came home one day and my computer was missing along with my playstation
then i find out homeboy moved to Phillie RIGHT AFTER.........

so be careful with ya house keys boi boi

Your friend cut his foot and you lost your key...doesn't seem too bad to me.

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pssshhh

dat aint even a fuked up night. its just unlucky lol

y'd u giv him ur key to get the glass out of his foot?

why dint he jus pull it out?

^^ he did, it dosn't sound fucked up, but you'd have to be there to truly bask in the fucked upness of it all to understand how fucked up it really was. And there's more to it then just "My friend cut his foot and I lost my key"

But anyways, it's like when a comedian says a joke and you LAUGH REALLY FUCKING HARD. I mean it's the funniest shit you've ever heard. Then you tell it to someone else and they're like "............" and you tell them "it's differant when you see the comedian do it"

Well ya....

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jail...........10 hrs........one pack of saltene crackers and a waterbottle....like those 8 oz ones.......enough said....

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^^ Lol, man when I move out of my house downtown, forget it, i'll be in jail every day

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killed this hooker n dumped her corpse off a bridge.... yup. werd

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R.I.P. EAZY-E

I passed out at a club in a booth, I woke up at about 5am and I was under the booth but the part that you sit on. There was like a foot spacing from the floor I guess I passed out and slid under the table and then somehow moved under the booth. Any ways so when I woke up I smashed my head on the boards above me and used my blackberry light to figure out where the fuck I was, I knew if I climbed out that silent alarm would be going off so I just called a friend to tell him where the fuck I was and then went back to sleep. I woke up again at 9 am but didn't get out until some dude arrived around 10am, when I was climbing out from under the 12inch spacing I scared the crap out of this dude he screamed like a little bitch and then after I explained what happend he laughed his ass off at me. what a fag....

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when my best friend was tripping acid for the first time we were walking through these shitty ass apartments and some little kid that looked EXACTLY like him runs up and hugs his leg and yells "DADDDDDYYYYYYY!"

he freaked the FUCK out and just took off running...

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^^you CAN'T be fuckin serious.............

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yeah...it wasnt his hes only ever fucked his girl theyve been together forever...but still..imagine that shit happenning to you when you werent trippin...

then imagine how much more it would freak you out the first time you ever tripped acid...

this trumps any other story in here by far...

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