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03-15-04, 03:00 PM | #1 | |||||||
Banned: Cheating
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Another freestyle. Please read and give me some feedback (I edited it a bit)
IP: 7BE2 A0A1
Here it goes, yo:
I ain’t come here to gloat, ‘bout you bein’ broke/ It’s your turn to rap, you betta not choke/ But then again, for you, nigga, that might be hard/ Your rap sounds like crap, you fuckin’ look like you got SARs/ When you start to stifle, that shit begins to feed/ You get addicted, like a little kid on weed/ Don’t be deceived, your shit gets niggas movin’/ Yea, that’s true, but to the fuckin’ exits where they groovin’/ When I come up, there be categories just for me/ Soon every nigga around town will know who I be/ You’ll never surpass me, wit the career you got/ Hey, over here, nigga, I think you missed a spot/ Lemme kno wat u guys think. Last edited by SPuL : 03-18-04 at 08:24 AM. |
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03-15-04, 05:50 PM | #2 | ||||||
New to RB
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IP: 1C3B C739
Don’t be deceived, your shit gets niggas movin’/
Yea, that’s true, but to the fuckin’ exits where they groovin’/ That was funny. It's a little hard to feel the flow, it's funny though.
__________________
Give away the stone. Let the oceans take and transmutate this cold and fated anchor. Give away the stone. Let the waters kiss and transmutate these leaden grudges into gold. |
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03-15-04, 10:41 PM | #3 | ||||
Suspended: Cheating
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IP: 75CE A0E1
you a funny type of muthafucka i like that.
your creative as fuck. keep up da good work. keep expandin your vocab so your shit can flow better much love from demolish 1 |
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03-16-04, 09:13 AM | #4 | |||||||
Banned: Cheating
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IP: 03C2 3387
I'm the black eminem!!! Nah, I'm playin'. I don't try to make my rhymes funny, but I guess they are.
Oh, and thanks for the compliments, yo. As for the flow thing, I put this together while rappin' to a beat, so I might try to record that sh*t and show it. But the only mic I have is one of those mics that are attached to the CPU. I'll try to expand my vocab to get it better. Than I'll put it up here. more feedback would be appreciated. |
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03-16-04, 10:14 AM | #5 | ||||||
New to RB
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IP: 87E3 F209
go check your emergency thread i replied
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03-16-04, 12:45 PM | #6 | |||||||
Banned: Cheating
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IP: 03C2 3387
I checked it. Feedback from anyone else would be cool.
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03-16-04, 04:45 PM | #7 | |||||||
Banned: Cheating
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IP: 7BE2 A0A1
I edited it a bit. LEt me know if it flows betta.
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03-17-04, 06:18 AM | #8 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: CD98 49E3
yo its wicked.you realy got sum fucking great talent mate keep it up.
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03-17-04, 09:01 AM | #9 | |||||||
Banned: Cheating
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IP: 03C2 3387
thanks, man. My next work will be done in your battle with me.
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03-17-04, 09:12 AM | #10 | ||||||
New to RB
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IP: 87E3 F209
spul, who`s your fav. rapper?
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03-17-04, 02:32 PM | #11 | |||||||
Banned: Cheating
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IP: 4577 CD9A
I listen to Murphy Lee the most. Gonna buy his DVD, comin' out soon. Second for me is G-Unit. For me, it's 1. Young Buck, 2. Llyod Banks, and 3. 50 Cent. Don't really like Yayo that much. The first person who got me into rap, was Eminem. I listened to a lot of his songs. he's cool.
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03-17-04, 09:33 PM | #12 | |||||
Light Weight
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IP: 4577 CD9A
your a funny dude and dont try to change a lil bit more work on the flow of the lyrics but your a good mutha fucka and eminem is my fav
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[IMG][/IMG] |
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03-17-04, 09:34 PM | #13 | ||||||
New to RB
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IP: 72E8 5D0B
yo maddhater dawg stop sayin shit about people i havent seen you flow at all
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03-17-04, 09:37 PM | #14 | |||||||
Banned: Cheating
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IP: 7BE2 A0A1
yea, the flow has a bit of a problem. The way I say it, it flows good, but by the lyrics it doesn't. But I'll work on it some more.
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03-18-04, 02:31 AM | #15 | ||||
....Trunks R 4 Bodies....
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IP: C1DA C961
i like the bars between the middle until the end.
that shit was creative. but the begining i thought was a little weak. |
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