stabbed myself 2x and feelin a lil woozy
watchin porn and jackin off in a jacuzzi
i fucked around got flipped upside down
and flew to the ground without a sound
moved outta town fucked a gay clown
went down & turned a smile to a frown
then i went to a lake too get down & drown
i play the flute while i sail down in a parachute
tryin ta be cute shut up or i'll fuckin push mute
i'ma rocker, ROCK ON DUDE.. while i act all rude
runnin in the nude tryin ta find what i just screwed
my balls are stuck together cuz they were hotglued
the last dude that said this shit always got sued
worse than slim shady i took drugz and now i'm crazy
people hate me and i looked down my pants a saw i'm a lady
now look out for the god damn chorus baby!!!

cuz i am whatever u say i am
hi..my name is.....stan
god damn that's not my shit man

i wake up in the dark and light up with one spark
got caught by a nark and fuckin got fed 2 a shark
ate a zuchini, grew some boobs and wore a bikinni
i have nuthin now ever since i lost my big weenie
it aint fuckin easy ta jack off when i dream of geenie
all of a sudden i feel like Peewee, sploogin at the big screen
two little kidz banging raw while she's still in her training bra
fuckin got stabbed in the jaw by my cats left claw
holy shit how much i drink ta say i drank, got wacked by a plank
blown up by a tank, hit with a spank all in one take, wasnt awake
got bored and scored with a fuckin whore at the keyboard
tripped over the cord and electrified myself with the cum i poured

cuz i am whatever u say i am
hi..my name is.....stan
god damn that's not my shit man