You spelled donor wrong.

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Soundclick

And coroner.

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Soundclick

im posting here to see my new avy

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Im A Throwback

see i won't post in here out of respect

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May 11th, 2006


I lossed it for real, I came THIS close to poppin pills
and overdose, but after a while I chose to stop and chill
I'm sick of bitchin, welts in my wrist won't help or fix it
next time I go to hell to visit, someone else is finished
if I can kill myself, than I can take away a life
with either choice I have no time or space make it right
it must be in your genes to be able to keep a promise
well lets see... they expect me to think they speech is honest
and ignore the deciet and comments that contradict it
constantly, but now you gotta learn to be optomistic
the magic of love is there, but subtracted the buzz
its like im an attict of something as drastic as drugs
it might get sad, with your life's end inside the bag
but you have to learn to love the good and like the bad
just to cope cause now I'm comin' close to everything
gettin rid of these hopes'll give me a stroke at 17
I would, block everybody, give em a note to let me be
they'll hope i'm dead, but I should go ghost for several weeks
will the other gender even remember my name?
after december? after a second or minute or day?
I guess fake emotion could explain most of this
cause quote love quote, seems like a mind game showin it
I shouldn't let her sense my moods, like I meant to do
before cause now I'm in the shoes, that most women use
the more I show the way I feel, I see a lack of caring
and she flirts too, with boys and girls I guess im back to sharing
I notice my faults, and know I'm overly pickey.....
I sware to god I'm needy, but she supposed to be with me
we lasted some months, I guess I'm askin too much
now I just wanna know how long before I have to shoot up

may 12th 06

I AM SO FUCKIN PARANOID RIGHT NOW,
Bite cows? fuck you

^stop talkin' bout cows son, I'll punch you in your teeth
Fuck biting cows, I'll cook 'em now, and show you beef!

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People are useless. I hate you, ESPECIALLY YOU, YOU WHO CAN READ THIS. Beadless meadkiss.

woot egypt in 5 days! fuck u non-traveling, stuck-in-chi motherfuckers pcout

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LOL

http://www.myspace.com/inebriation927 hit me up bitch

NEjji I miss you If you can read this know that I am currently beating off/thinking about you. MWahsluhslopsluhsluhslopsluhmwahsluhsluhslopmop... mmmmm....mwah

[spul]womp womp womp womp, womp womp womp wom wom wom womp [/spul]

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This is a kinda dope diary.

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Daubs MySpace

Sunday, March 19th 2006 (later on)

Main focus: getting close to understanding it all Still confused tho


____, a friend of mine, became my analyst
to the damage done, he can assist me, but he vanishes...

(Brownnumber18 signed off at 7:53:28 PM.)

The second I saw that, hella questions went off fast
He left without addressin' it, I'm stressed and I'm all crashed
my thought's false, I'm kneeling hurt, to the perfectionist
God'll bless me with the lake, but won't let me catch the fish
She's either feeding me patience or She's leaving me hangin'
Giving me peices of language, but won't teach me to say it
the funny thing is, I know for sure my feelings must be real
with all my shit, my question is "will __ love me still"
if after its said and finished,and my head edit's twisted...
and my spirit, progresses residency instead of visits
and I shed my skin and awaken different and changed
will she keep the interest, or wonder if its a phase......
she listens to jean grae, well "love song" has the attitude
that half the dudes will stab your back, and that they bad for you..
and what's sad is, that random fact is true..... I'm bad news
but I can't detach her from my life, we gettin married.. .we have too
no one else can try to be my wife, I never felt this high
with any other female, but hell, this could be my selfish side..
I need time to think, and I should try to see why it's me
that has so much trouble putting his mind at ease

Names blocked for personal reasons

Monday, March 20th 2006

Main focus: Santa Clause in a way

I saw a film, it was true, but I feel it'll 'still' the movement
hustle and flow, it was ill, but I don't know if I can build improvement..
with my location, my will in music can't even kill the nuisance
I feel secluded, I want delusion, it was a real illusion
I'm losing hope... am I climbing high or did I move the rope?
have my notes finally stopped escaping from a foolish throat?
I lossed my cause, my fighting, the trying, the mind tricks..
why? it's naive to believe this country will love more than white men..
this is nothing new, tupac realised that it's too much to do
I'm wondering if I should think of myself and get comfortable
I'm crushed, ima throw the towel in the hamper and stop..
who was I kidding, I won't win, even the panthers have flopped
I wanna seek an answer from god, shit.. it can't hurt to drop..
to my knees and pray, and I guess to feel the hand from the top
niggas dyin, but why should I care? if you knew you in prayors
of some, while people shooting you, they worse then dudes who'll spray 1st
cause those the faggots who actually think that they doin a favor
when really I don't believe that shit is even movin the maker
its so dark, as I grow it seems the entire planet falls
I guess I'll entitle the little hope I got left, Santa clause..


eh, I'm out, I havent even slept yet since my 1st entry -_- GEt online nejla

Tuesday, March 21st, 2006

Main focus: Just clearing my head

its been only two days, but she has yet to get on
I'm worried, the pressure dawns, so now everything ethical's gone
I wrote and ripped an epistle cause I been stressed for too long
I'm thinkin "she left you", I guess its nothing left to do wrong
Decree said she probably found a 'somebody', but how?
how could I be so, petty and jealous, I got me a spouse
My motives over explosive, I struggle with focusin'
I supposed to have been signed but I sense I've lossed hope again
but now for rap, its 7 am, I hopped out the shower fast
to see if nejla was on, but I shouldn't of let the hours pass
but my coward ass remains quiet and yo..lol its classic shit
NOW she decides not to get on, when I dont have to ditch..
school defeated me, I dropped out, I'm about to get A GED
I didnt tell nejla that, due to my fear of her leaving me
she holds tendencies, to defend her reasons to see the least
in herself, so of course, I withheld speaking of demons reached
but we perfect for eachother, both of us are off the wall
but my baby need to learn that none of its her fault at all
I guess I should praise allah, but for now I'm thanking god
so I can make it far, but I'ma pray to help me take a job

out