Ohhh k kid, you got some good vocab, good flow but fo real, don't just write shit about like self-glorification, try and get on a subject for real and really put thought into it, you're just learnin but yeah you will elevate, stick around, stay up and you''ll get better kid....

............Pz.............

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Thanx 4 Everything, I have no complaints whatsoever

Learnin everyminute.....

peace

drop the vocab. work on flow.... your on the right track kid. practice makes perfect. wunn~

oh yeh lemme speak soem wisdom to you. outside of this internet rap b.s. the world dont give a fuck about vocab. net-cees just spit vocab ridiculous and where has that gotten any net kids? u see any of em signin deals? naw.

^^be right,vocab isnt important honestly,it is,but not as much as you would expect...dont need a great deal of emphasis on big words and such,it just dont need it....but i liekd htis...you ahve to work on flow..the flow was out a lil,other then that..ermm.i liked th emulties assualt at the beginning...that was nice,then the rest of the song,was spaced out strangly,couldnt pick it up,but eh,who cars,its only words...this was pretty good,but definete room for improvement in the flow-bar lenght placement type of thing,self glorifaction like mead mentioend,wont get you nowhere,try stay on topic,it wa s good verse but you need to keep on,if you seem to be loosing the topic,just stop...nice spit...but ease the vocab back a bit,sounds forced nahmean....if its fromth ehart and has a meaning and emotion too it,no amount of big words wll make it any better then small ones...

thankyou for posting in my new verse,im glad you liked it..

keep spitting..

bismillah

uppin 4 more advise---

gotta battle comin up---i'm weak with the punches---
my first battle sucked---pretty much got slammed--
havin a hard time lettin go a the spiritual flow
workin on the punches

any insight apprecaited


thanx

on a battle type tip... read up onr ur opponent. and then think of some clever shit to go with it. dont force it. cuz u usually got a week or so to drop ur verse.

thanx 4 the tip-------

the journey continues ta be able ta just flow with the punches-----aspiring ta be like the masters

genius minds abide in this here place-----


wish ther was a compilation of all the best here---

yall should be gettin paid---
we should all have it made
plantin seeds n fulfillin r needs
food/clothing/shelta n love
the knowledge that Gods Omnipotent
not just above
so pick up yo brother insteada shove
paradise is what i'm thinkin of...


peace

thanx all

uppin----

nice sen, very nice, i liked it , holla La Familia

uppin 4 some more tips----what punches seem ta hit the hardest---what knocks yer opponent down so they can't get up--

tryin hard ta be mean----I'm to use ta gettin high n bein chill,
yet I'm up 4 the challenge---


peace


thanx all

hey sen if u drop me a link of ur new song ill judge it too im working on one right now

uppin 4 more a yall words a wisdom---
appreciate your knowledge n know how


peace

thanX

it was a good piece, it had its ups and downs, you should try to stay more consistent, and usin large words in your verses doesnt really inhance tha piece if no one undastands what you are talkin about, put away tha dictionary and use your own diction. Nice post though, not tryin to be critical or anythin, just speakin my mind, peace, 1 luv

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uppin--4 more critiques

thanX 4 the peeps


peace