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Old 08-16-05, 06:24 PM   #31
~Lady Fiya~
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-edit-.................................................. ..............................
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Old 08-16-05, 06:31 PM   #32
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dat looks like u critted acuity and sum1 else at da same time???? cos a couple tracks named aint on acuities page lol but sum are
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Old 08-16-05, 06:55 PM   #33
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Which ones... I just checked his page all those are on there.. ~_~...

Get Da Fuck Back
...Mans Down...
One Drunk Night
Cradle of Rhymes
and the top Freestyle are the ones i peeped.
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Old 08-16-05, 06:58 PM   #34
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fiyas beautiful
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Old 08-16-05, 07:10 PM   #35
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i dunno im tired as fuck loool
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Old 08-16-05, 07:18 PM   #36
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Who's giving LF an audio breakdown? Actually, i guess my post is more of a question LF: what's your credentials? Are you signed? You an A/R? Not attackin, just curious.
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Old 08-16-05, 07:30 PM   #37
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^No, Doomsday but a few people asked me to tell them what I think they need work on in another thread. So I just made a different thread to do so. I'm simply helping those or telling people how to elevate with things and tips I done to work on my audios. It's simply a feedback thread, Fiya-style, last time I checked I didn't have to be signed to tell someone my opinion on their tracks. And anyone can take this entirely the wrong way, if they want. I'm just letting out feed no bias, no hate, no bullshit.
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Old 08-16-05, 07:33 PM   #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Lady Fiya~
^No, Doomsday but a few people asked me to tell them what I think they need work on in another thread. So I just made a different thread to do so. I'm simply helping those or telling people how to elevate with things and tips I done to work on my audios. It's simply a feedback thread, Fiya-style, last time I checked I didn't have to be signed to tell someone my opinion on their tracks. And anyone can take this entirely the wrong way, if they want. I'm just letting out feed no bias, no hate, no bullshit.



yeah I hear what you're saying. I'm not attacking you by asking if you're signed or anything, I asked what your credentials are. Your answer is essentially "none". Just an opinions thread. Well, best of luck with that, hope people benefit from it.
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Old 08-16-05, 07:33 PM   #39
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Ill!

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Your Sample
1st Verse

Lyrics....
Aight this gonna be the hardest for you. I can tell you’re used to writing cuz you have straight words not many pauses in your verse offside from the end of snares. You just keep going on and on… Which is okay until you start jamming too many words and rushing to finish up bars to hit snares. But the lyrics themselves, I can’t make out everything you say because you are wayyyy under the beat. From what I could hear; however, you have a really simple rhyme scheme. DO NOT worry bout switching up the rhyme scheme right at this moment.

Voice/Presence...
Great choice of beat for your voice. Your voice is light, this heavy beat sounds good under it. There is a problem tho, you have an extra weak presence. You don’t need to turn the volume up on your this, you‘re just too quiet, period.

Emotion/Delivery...
You need to get comfortable and stop being afraid to express what you say. Even people with light voices (Eminem), can get people to be shook up by their voices. You sound like you barely got your lines memorized. You don’t sound confident at all in this sample. Give yourself another day to memorize the lines first… then repeat it in front of a mirror as if you were recording and ask yourself would you believe the shit that’s coming outta your mouth. As you go on, you gotta gain confidence so others believe the words you present.

Flow...
Flow is not all about hitting the snares. You rushing your lyrics to hit snares. That’s not good at all. I can see if you were doing it while riding the beat. But if you can’t do it creatively, restrain from doing it in the first place. So DO NOT do it at this point.

Overall

Since I only critiqued one track you put up. This might not be valid to every track you do, but for this one. Your presence is what you should focus on. Let people hear you. Don’t hide behind the mic. That’s what you need to do first. Then, for Emotion and Delivery, feel your lyrics. Have them memorized don’t be in a rush to put out your verse and have it sounding like you are reading. Take your time and let the verse come out your mouth naturally. Once you got your presence and delivery to a certain confidence level, you can work on your lyrics and an appropriate rhyme scheme.
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Old 08-16-05, 07:44 PM   #40
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Lol... okay, Doomsday. *Goes back to what I was doing*
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Old 08-16-05, 07:47 PM   #41
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i kinda dis-agree wiv alot of wat u said... if u knew me and wat i sound like normally... my personality shows very well in my delivery(btw my vocals arent too low u need new speakers... i edit my tracks usin monitors).. also i KNOW its nout bout landin da snare i been tellin dat for tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime now... also my rhyme scheme changes up onlikeatleast 3 different occasions in each verse.. and i am confident as a person and as an MC... if u was to listen to me before my confidence boost... ud realise wat i am confident... im a cocky lil fucker by nature its just me its my personality... it mite not come out wit my voice... but i dont vgot da voice to carry da cocky style.... so i try puttin abit of cockyness into it wiv my also joky personality aswell...... but seriously i vguess u need to know wat im really like in order to realise truth bout my presence etc o n btw... i never read lyrics.. i practice a week before recordin unless its a battle or suttin like dat
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Old 08-16-05, 07:59 PM   #42
~Lady Fiya~
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^what I didn't even peep your track yet.. that was to ILL! look at the title on the post.
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Old 08-16-05, 08:00 PM   #43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Lady Fiya~
^what I didn't even peep your track yet.. that was to ILL! look at the title on the post.



LMAOF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 08-16-05, 08:11 PM   #44
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http://outspoken.dmusic.com/
just the song let me hold you
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Old 08-16-05, 08:12 PM   #45
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I dont think you know me but if you want please check out my new songs.....

www.soundclick.com/intermental

check Aisha, Hocus Pocus, Forgive me, the others are whack

I basically started a week or two ago....

thanks,

Intermental
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