yea but some feelings you just CANNOT escape...some feelings deal wit ur sorrounding...the emptyness outweighs my depression....in a way i cant escape from emptyness cuz emptyness is all around me cuz there's nuthin around me...and thats why im automatically happy as fuck whenever im wit anybody who is down ta ride wit me...im automatically happy when i get people ta reconize me...i aint sayin im a lil immature attention seeker
but i defintly do love attention in a diffrent way though
not through immaturity but because of the emptyness that gets dragged along wit every breath i make

Explain the emptyness you're talking about.

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Get up, get out and do something....

I think you need a larger sense of ambition and working towards goals. Maybe spend a few weeks working out and planning exactly what you want to achieve in your life time, then slowly putting together the blueprint of how your gonna do this from point A to point B.

The more you work towards a goal in life, the more fulfilling your life will become...

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RIP jono, peace out bboy.
Pardon Canada Criminal Record Pardons Services Toronto

Na, when you're depressed though... You really CAN'T push yourself, no matter how bad you want it the motivation just isn't there. That's why he's really got to tell someone about this so that he has people forcing him do get up and to work out and everything else.

EXACTLY i want ta keep writing i hate ta quit but i have ta if i dont want ta write anything thats forced...everything i try ta write i like lose my motivation wit in less than like 5 lines that arent even that good cuz i aint got the soul ta push myself like i used to...

a loss of motivation really makes me question whether im really cut out for what im tryin ta do since i cant get myself ta do it like i used to...
but i know im serious about it and i know what im goin through is just a stage
i just have ta clear my life of all the depression and make my life seem more like a life and not so empty

what i mean by empty is i feel like there's NOTHING going on in my life
like i said i aint got NOBODY ta turn to for anything...
no friend, no girlfriend, no brother or sister, no family
and my parents are the most stubborn ignorant non-understanding parents i've ever met in my whole entire life so i cant depend on them
ta guide me through life by what i see in my parents i have a
clear understanding that my parents have less of a understanding on life
than i do...my parents will NEVER be understanding
like i said before i been in my house by myself for 7 MONTHS (not including school which i got kicked out of anyways)
i dont have anybody ta just kick it wit as far as rhymes and shit
and i could keep goin on....i feel like i have nothing going for me and nothing ever will be..thats what i mean by being empty..is having nothing

i dont mean ta make my life seem so gloomy but thats what been keepin me down in life...and i dont know how ta fix it...i dont get excited bout shit no more like i used to, i dont get scared or happy or anxious, i dont get motivated like i used to..feels like i been bored for an eternity
how am i ever gon feel like anything is worth it if thats what sorrounds me?

in this town there's only a library a few gas stations a department store, family video a few restaurants and other regular town shit...aint like the city where there places i can go ta fullfill my dream..if i had a studio or local radiostation i could go to or a place where i can do some shit live
or have a school that had plays and shit i could feel more fulfilled
but there aint nothing here and i cant go no where cuz i aint got a license
and i cant get my license cuz i failed every class but one in 9th grade and failed 3 classes as of last year..so my insurance would be sky high.
and i have ta pay for everything my driving tests, temps, car, insurance, gas
and i have a job im lucky ta get a day in a week ta work which pays me 5.50 an hour and i got nothing saved for a car..and my parents wont take me anywhere cuz its just a crazy unrealistic dream to them...so how can i get anywhere else?? i cant

Where do you even live?

wisconsin....

^ No wonder...

But really this topic is deep...How can one be ready to die, even if you kill yourself..your not really ready to die..

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iGhostwrite Mixtape DL

what u mean by "no wonder"???

EXACTLY why i dont wanna kill myself even though i wanna die

I look at suicide as a fear of death, as ironic as that sounds. To me, suicidal people feel as though they have a loss of control, such a loss to the extent that they feel without that control life isn't worth living. Therefore they decide to kill themselves as an act of final and outstanding control. It's more or less the ultimate act of stubborness, there's no debating death, and when it's self inflicted than it's seems a good way to go out because it's by your terms.

lol it was a joke, even though i know a few people form Wisconsin and they all seem to be gloomy and ish...

That's just wierd...

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iGhostwrite Mixtape DL

lol oh...i dont know i guess wisconsin can just be kinda gloomyish
not too many people know what wisconsin like since there really hasnt been any emcees from wisconsin that made it large..but no matter how hard wisconsin might be clowned on there are some dope emcees here
in the state anyway..there aint any where i live...where u live?

Still thought death is too serious to want, I've tried killing myself before (long story) and even I wasn't ready, I had did something that caused me to literally flash back through my life, I thought I wanted to die then it hit me.. death isn't something you can choose, if you die you can't come back from that...thats what some people need to realize it..it took me a while but once i realized this... you learn to enjoy life..

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iGhostwrite Mixtape DL

ok for quoting what you read out of a psychology book

I thought this would be a "deep" thread. Guess I was wrong...



Neway, am I ready to die? No. Am I afraid of death? No.


Every man must face death once. Then, after that, the judgment.




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