i must've been born a ghost.. at most, i am barely seen
just a bad joke who's being choked by a scary dream
& my self-esteem .. has evaporated out of existence
cause even when i talk to myself.. still, nobody listens
wake up to no hugs & kisses.. only disses are there
consistanly reminding me that no one misses or cares
this isn't fair.. why & when did the love disappear?
how did i become a vision no one wishes to share?
i live in dispair.. w/ only lonely feelings to bare the weight
as i dive straight into the abyss of loneliness & hate
my mind state has become the only kind place to go
so i find myself hiding behind thoughts.. just to lay low
until the day goes... & night slowly creeps over the sky
vodka..as it gets mixed w/ the weeps from my eye
to drown my sorrow's along w/ tommorow's good byes
cause my future is only a wake waiting on my present to die
so why do i presently try
to be pleasently surprised by life
when inside, i feel like the whole point.. is at the end of a knife
it just doesn't seem rite.. to live when death is certain
& you feel like an actor wrapped in the final curtain
what's your mind worth when the world's turning its back
& your opinion doesn't matter cause public opinion is fact
so the fact of the matter is... you are what society precieves
as it precedes to spoon feed you until you believe
once you do, your doomed cause they've planted thier seed
this means you are no longer you..
& have grown to be who they want you to be
this is the person that i see in me.. now back to the post
cause "the real Rich" doesn't exist... this was written by a ghost

Muaaahhhhhaaaahhhhhhaaaaaahhhhaaaaa..... BOO!!

yo this was an exquisit read.................
wordplay rhythm wordusage imadry attentiveness to detail and over all just fucken tight.....i dont see any flaw in this and think it would make for a great audio i must say this has impressed me ...

Well thank you very much... feedback is appreciated

yo this piece was tight.....i luved the imagery, worplay, vocab, shit was raw...tight ass piece....basicall y evrything that WORD

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yeah, i agree with the other two..hott shyt man..really enjoyable..the way it flowed was like a good eminem piece..coo..look out for you in the future..keep droppin..

Good Piece, Nice Read, Didnt Bore Me
and Liba is Right...Did Flow ALOT Like Eminem
Even Though Eminem Has Nice Flow, You Gotta Have Some Uniquness With Your Own Flow...Na'mean

Overall

8.6/10 mics

sa'weet sh*t.............................................. ...............wordplay off the chart............it were all good when it comes to points of critique............aight peace.

Uppin

This was a very good piece. I felt the detail and the way you put this together was really good. The Structure was good the vocabulary was good but your rhyme scheme was great. This was a really good poem right through it wasn't boring at all well done, you put that together really well

Keep it up.

peace

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Open Mics
The Weathers Art
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=108673
My Teenage Eyes
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...threadid=104850
Secluded
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...851#post1148851
Open Your Eyes
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...461#post1157461

This shit is hot man no doubt.. flow was exceptional god dam.. real smooth.. Wordplay was nice.. You had some nice mtaphorical referances too.. This was on some real type knowledge shit and im feelin it.. keep it up.. peace

holla

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Sonz Of Enlightenment

THanks

This was hott as heck man .............. liked the structure and every thign bout it ............... keep flowing,

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"The Legion" takes no prisoners!

I can be nice but dont make me mad....cause when I loose control.......your dead !!

my site:http://freestyleman.proboards25.com/index.cgi

i replied to this as RnR ..

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I Know