Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
12-11-06, 04:53 PM | #1 | ||||||
New to RV
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Slowly Dying
IP: C0C4 9921
(Spoken Word)
I'm Slowly Dying With No Regrets At All I'm Slowly Dying I Guess Lifes A Test After All I'm Slowly Dying.. Its Ok I Need My Sleep I'm Slowly Dying.. Just Leave Me Be (Spoken Word) Normal People Wake Up Happy To Live, Cheerful And Optimistic But Me Homie.. I Wake Up Sweatsoaked, Dead Broke My Clock Is Tickin To The Final Hour To Where I Can Rest My Head Down Slowly Hoping To Get Stabbed, Shot And Jacked By Everyone Who Approach Me I'm Endangered Homie Come On Poach Me! So I Can Join The Spirits Still Hold My Pride First Kill Anyone Who Nears It - Shh.. You Hear It? Thats The Beckoning From The Afterlife Praying For My Early Visit Put Down The Bottles Of Alcohol Won't Be Needing It But Surely I'll Miss It My Livers Shot At The Young Age But Still The Sun Came Afterall My Strong Tribes Blood Tested My Thug And Gave Me A Chance To Fall No Chance For College My Dreams Have Already Been Shot Down Working Minimum Wage Rest Of My Life.. I'd Rather Stop Now.. With All The Trials And Tribulations I'll Be Damned To Fall Now Knowing Of My Early Demise.. Listen To Me.. I've Planned It All Out This Is To All My Loved Ones Never Quit Loving Don't Stop It And When You Find My Body.. Be Sure To Look At The Note In My Pocket (Spoken Word) I'm Slowly Dying With No Regrets At All I'm Slowly Dying I Guess Lifes A Test After All I'm Slowly Dying.. Its Ok I Need My Sleep I'm Slowly Dying.. Just Leave Me Be (Spoken Word) "To Whom This May Concern, I Must Be Deceased For You To Read This From The Bulletwound In My Head And Slit Wrists Suicide You Prob Deem It No, You're Far From Correct.. Now Listen To The Story I Must Tell You I Had The Perfect Life Perfect Girl.. Then One Day It All Just Fell Thru I Get A Call At Work From My Girl.. She Says Shes 3 Months Pregnant 3 Months Pregnant! I'm Going To Be A Daddy But I Always Wrapped It Up I Didn't Get It But Did I Fail To Mention.. I Worked Hard All Day And Night To Pay Rent Bought My Shoes From Payless And Gave Her EVERYTHING Anything! U Can Name It A Blood Test A Month Later Made Me Realize.. Thats Distinctly Not My Baby So Which Guy Got My Lady? Or I Hope It Was An Inpromptu Test Maybe So I Go Home.. Just Hoping For Homegrown Then I Hear Some Noises Upstairs Open Bedroom Door Shes Having An Affair Baby Its Not What U Think.. WHO THE FUCK CARES! Robbing Me Blind For My Money And My Pride Knowing My Liver Is Weak From Stress *Pull Out My Gun From The Drawer* Blood Dripping From My Mouth.. Is This Whats Best? Do You Know Who I Am.. I Screamed At The Man.. Blood Curdiling I Belched Out So Whom Ever Is Reading This.. Now You Read My Story.. Wanna Help Me Out? (Spoken Word) I'm Slowly Dying With No Regrets At All I'm Slowly Dying I Guess Lifes A Test After All I'm Slowly Dying.. Its Ok I Need My Sleep I'm Slowly Dying.. Just Leave Me Be (Spoken Word) Now As The Coroner Read This - This Clearly Isnt What She Suspected My Life In Her Hands.. Obliged To Follow The Direction N Correct It Then She Leaves The Room And Locks The Door - Continues Stompin Forth Dead Body Rises From The Table.. Pulls Off The Makeup And Follows Course She Arrived At My Residence In The Afternoon - Findin My Stashed Clues *I've Been Here Before* She Thinks Suddenly She Remembers The Mass Blues There Was A Dead Male And Female Body.. In A Weird Position Or Something Then She Realized Wait The Male Body Happened Just To Be Her Husband A Noise Behind Her Startled Her Senses I Was In The Doorway Stareing Its All Your Fault I Said.. Remember When It All Started The Day You Got Married My Wife Was One Of Your Bridesmaids.. And Your Man Happened To Spill On Him Punch Party She Took Him To The Bathroom To Clean The Spot.. They Hit It Off.. Then The Fun Started They Met.. Every Two Weeks From Then On.. To Each Of Our Spite And Glisten And Remember Last Year He Told You We Have To Talk.. But You Frankly Didn't Listen He Was About To Say He Chose You Over My Wife.. His Love Was Too Strong Towards You But Your Rudeness And Anger Made Him Choose Mine.. CHOSE MINE OVER YOU! Then He Decided.. Nah One Last Time Before I Go Back To My Love And Soul And My Boss Decided To Give Me The Rest Of The Day Off.. Ended In Deciet And More Quickly Busted Out The Heat.. Put Two Inside Of The Coroner.. Then I Stop And Fall My Liver Finally Gave Up.. But I Left One More Note For The Paramedics.. Love Conquers All (Spoken Word) I'm Slowly Dying With No Regrets At All I'm Slowly Dying I Guess Lifes A Test After All I'm Slowly Dying.. Its Ok I Need My Sleep I'm Slowly Dying.. Just Leave Me Be (Spoken Word) P.M. me two links and I will reopen your thread. Links cannot be over 10 days old.
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M.O.B All Day.. Come See Me. Last edited by Willa : 01-17-07 at 06:15 AM. |
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12-11-06, 05:45 PM | #2 | ||||
Flyweight
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IP: F3EB D146
Nice. Looking at the first few lines I thought this would be a below average piece. But I was pulled in as I read on because I felt like I could relate to the situation. Throw in some great emotion with what seemed to be a pretty good gift at story telling and you have yourself a nice piece. I liked it man, change ur font tho. Shits gay. haha, pz.
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get attached to a rolling stone and you're libel to get crushed.. |
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12-14-06, 11:39 PM | #3 | ||||||
New to RV
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IP: C0C4 9921
thanks man.. uppin for feed.
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M.O.B All Day.. Come See Me. |
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12-20-06, 10:07 AM | #4 | |||||||
Banned: Pink Slipped
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IP: C2BA 4E39
Good shit to me homey. As long as your rappin about real life and your personnal feelings It's not up to me to say if it's good or bad. You got your point and emotions accross skillfully so it's tight to me.
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12-27-06, 03:40 PM | #5 | ||||||
Flyweight
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IP: 2DA9 8083
im feelin this alot......i mean man.....the shyt came together in the end it reminded me of three sides to a story by joe budden.........im mean the flow is stretched to all hell.....and i had to read it again cuz lookin at the structure and some of the minor mistakes i couldnt grasp what the connection was.....
this was deep.......the 2nd verse seemed dramatic.....and the 3rd started off great with the unraveling.....but i think killin the coroner was a lil bit tooooo harsh in my opinion....... *shrugs* good shyt |
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