Its been a while, i was busy on another site, n i decided to finally come back n see if u were up n workin n u are doin damn well so im gonna start gettin involved here again, this is a poem kind aoutta the ordinary with the prespective it was written in, but here it is, lemme kno what u think

-x-The Analyzation-x-

Last resort or first priority?
Am I the most important?
or am I just there incase
It’s not that I want war with them
they are just taking you away from I
and I am not sure wether I or Them come first
and I don’t want to declare war against Them
without knowing why
knowing why you analyze everything
analyze I and analyze Them
analyze I to Them and Them to I
pronouncing a hopeless war
of one I against a many Them
alone in my individual arbitrary
as I independently confess jealousy
of a nothing that arose from Them
a jealousy even You, I, and Them
couldn’t demolish nor prevent
Chaotically ashamed of my meek assumption
that They are placed before I
or maybe my inference was fact
and maybe I too blind from the persuading of
You and Them simultaneously was only sheltered
and enslaved of my own beliefs to become priority
to Them because You perhaps overwhelmed in this
power let Them enslave I in torturous circumstances
making I the hopeless antagonist suffering from Them
and You making I the last resort and Them the Priority

Pretty good. Parts of it were confusing with all those I's and Them's though, hehe. Towards the ending I got kinda lost with what was happening. I dunno, I'm a dumbass so maybe that's why. But I liked reading it. How you analyzed what was going on was cool.



My favorite part out of the whole thing. You made it plain and simple what the writing was about in those lines. Post more stuff up..

hey girl glad you decided to come back this was okay liked the way you thought things out i also find that first part to be the best part but then it slowly loses its effect but all and all it was a good post keep elevating

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thanks, yeah this was one of those poems where you start out with sumthin good but u tryn get everythin n there n it just falls apart but it was all i could come up with n i was excited to cum bac soo ..uppin

Nice concept...

...though i felt at times it collapsed into carnage...overall i got the jist of it...though i don't think i actually got what YOU as the poet was writing about...

...but yeah, i liked what you tried to do with this piece, it's hard to do...i've done it a couple of times...most go totally wrong...but there's always that one that flows perfect...and comes off well..

..for me, this one was in between...which was kind of weird..

..resp...

that was cool wats again

thanks varentao

yo baby g - what's been happenin? i was a member of the original rap battles site - but i got a new id now. mad propz - i'm likein' your style. check out my latest post - subject matter is an outside look into what's around everyday but most ignore - and it's not from personal experience.
anywayz check it and let me know what you think..........by the way u still live in newie?