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Old 05-23-05, 04:09 PM   #1
DQ
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Whyte Ave. vs. Elementality

IP: 41CC 315E

Battles up Monday - Check In by Wednesday - Drop by Friday - Votes by Sunday

No line limit and the battler with most votes by Sunday night is the winner. If this is a topical battle, write a topical and not a poetic drop and the same is vice a versa.

All Battlers must vote on 4 other battles and leave their voting links in their battle thread. Battles voted on may be from either poetry or topical battles.

Extensions must be asked for by Thursday night by pming any of the mods (Acuity, Drama Queen & Elementality). No extensions will be given 4 if asked 4 on Friday night. Extensions are only given till Sunday night at the most.

Every battler must nominate (not their own) one topical and poetry battle for pieces of the week, in the main forum . People with pieces of the week shall have their drops stickied and placed in the Pieces Of Inspiration sub forum


Topic:http://img1.imagetitan.com/img.php?...n=excalibur.jpg
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Old 05-23-05, 05:46 PM   #2
Whyte Ave.
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check check check it out...what what whats it all about
I dunno
 
Old 05-24-05, 01:07 AM   #3
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Old 05-27-05, 04:35 PM   #4
Elementality
 
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As demise lurks in the dark he is impatient
His sword is thirsty for the taste of blood
One with the night he will take your life

He sticks his teeth into your confidence
Pulling you down and down, you're paralized
Sucking the life out of you like the sadistic

This forest is evidence of death's sanction
He lifts all the weight out of the living
Here I sit in the dark silent wild waiting

The angel of death grins as I stand dieing.
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Old 05-27-05, 11:46 PM   #5
Whyte Ave.
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not the greatest...

Glimmering Hope


Defeated and Drown
An army has fallen
Territory once owned
Has been claimed

The mist shrouds the future
The outline of the enemy
Faintly seen
As the water begins to ripple
Suddenly cracking
A solider has not fallen

Rising from the watery grave
Into the unknown
But known at one time
A new sword, clean, unused
A new battle
A new hope
Optimism gleams
Even if faint

*Mist = Mystery of the future, because the new army has taken over
Enemy: The face of the enemy is not known, what they bring is unknown
The Sword: Clean, which brings new hope and new start
The shining sword: Only thing that is bright in the picture, hope is small
 
Old 05-29-05, 05:39 AM   #6
DQ
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Both had a good piece, I know picture matches aren't the easiest...

Elementality: you had excellent vocab which expressed a nice level of emotion but strongest aspect was the imagery in my opinion. You managed to portray the scene as if it was a movie combined with strong emotion. Kept readers focussed, had such a poetic vibe over it. Favo line is the last one, excellent drop!

Whyte Ave.: I feel you had stronger emotion than imagery, I like how you portrayed the sword as new hope, new start. Imagery was good as well but the emotion was best aspect of your piece. Had more basic viocab than Elementality but it pictured a serene scene which I liked.

In the end my vote goes to Elementality because I feel his imagery was excellent and his emotion was strong too. Whyte Ave., you had a great piece as well, nice topic approach. Was most definitely a close battle!
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Old 05-29-05, 09:48 AM   #7
Dervla
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Elementality-Alright man, nice vocab. The emotion was good too, but the strongest aspect of your piece was the imaginary, I felt the your poem like an slide-show or somthin.

Whyte Ave- What's good bruh?...Ah see you on rb . Alright nice piece man, you had good work on the imaginary not like Elemnetality though, i liked the emotion which was the best aspect of your verse. Upp on the vocab, you must've quick key'd on this did you?...



Overall=My vote goes to Elementality yo, cause he had good imaginary, stronger emotion with the strong vocab also. The way he approach the topic was good. Whyte ave, you lost my vote by not having good imaginary nor stronger emotion, upp your vocab....Yo Keep dropping....


PS-WHYTE AVE?....WHY YOU AIN'T IN SS NO MORE?........
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Old 05-30-05, 07:58 AM   #8
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Old 05-31-05, 12:11 PM   #9
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Vote goes to me .
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