Yo.....in the night life// my shark vengence is a strong bite// my words are news to the ears like roger kronkite// you cant fuck with this// enter my world, hell is a long way from bliss// when the guns lick// you better kiss away all of your fear// reporcusions-for-your-actions, the devils lookin at you wit a long snear// fightin is useless// you'll feel the pain when the gun hits// when you hit the ground you'll get a rush of the pain and the horror// you'll see god his holy ora// your memory is at a long distance// nobody fears- nobody cares, take that for instance// an eternity of all love gone// noone strong// everyones equal, your mind, body and soul becomes one(won)// my rhymes are vengance// from all of the years-all-of-the-tears, from being a youthly mennace// sometimes you cant take it// all you can do is sit back and watch, the mind is a strong tool much like a loaded glock

yo its aiit...
kept me reading..
...all you can do is sit back and watch, the mind is a strong tool much like a loaded glock...good line..
keep postin

^^^koo, good looks on the feedback. Im just tryin to elivate. come'on yall gimmie some mo feed back

__________________
*R.I.P*
Jimmy L. , Louis L. , Aj R. , Tyler R. , Chris R., Dan W. , Matt F.......
" You all will never be forgotten and your spirits live within us all!!! R.I.P*"


" So for the 2nd time [The Pharisses] summoned the man who had been blind and said
"Speak the truth before God. We know this man is a sinner."
"Wether he is a sinner I do not know."
:The man replied:
"All I know is this...Once I was blind and now I can see"
John 1x 24-26

yOooo .. im new tuh diisz r.b thiinq .. buh B`, dat keystyle of yOursz was type tiqht .. juss liike hellbound, iim loviin` dat last liine .. iim look`n forward for more verses frOm yOu .. `16oO

yea yea one of the best single verses i've read u proly be good at batlin to u should try that shit out namean

thanx alot fo the feedback yall, im'a be droppin some new shit soon so keep an eye out fo that shit.......and yo severe lyrics, yea i be battle'n alot but i just registered to rb so im'a be doi it soon......keep it comin yall 100

__________________
*R.I.P*
Jimmy L. , Louis L. , Aj R. , Tyler R. , Chris R., Dan W. , Matt F.......
" You all will never be forgotten and your spirits live within us all!!! R.I.P*"


" So for the 2nd time [The Pharisses] summoned the man who had been blind and said
"Speak the truth before God. We know this man is a sinner."
"Wether he is a sinner I do not know."
:The man replied:
"All I know is this...Once I was blind and now I can see"
John 1x 24-26

just for looks you should post the lines under each other

verse was good... flow was on point, mulits lacked... i like mulits... vocab was rather simple but the the flow saved it

good job and elevation is in your future

if you would be so kind (slept on)
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=81616
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=81183
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=81665

elivate'n is all im tryin to do so thanx for the feed back......uppin this fo more feed back, 1

__________________
*R.I.P*
Jimmy L. , Louis L. , Aj R. , Tyler R. , Chris R., Dan W. , Matt F.......
" You all will never be forgotten and your spirits live within us all!!! R.I.P*"


" So for the 2nd time [The Pharisses] summoned the man who had been blind and said
"Speak the truth before God. We know this man is a sinner."
"Wether he is a sinner I do not know."
:The man replied:
"All I know is this...Once I was blind and now I can see"
John 1x 24-26

it was a alright peice, you should put your lines under eachother, your vocab was alright, could use some more multies to help support the flow, your flow was good though, overall id say it was pretty good, keep dropping, and if you get the chance leave some feedback on one of my peices, much appreciated, thanks.