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Old 12-14-03, 07:52 PM   #1
filed
Sharp Perfection.
 
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From: HELL!!....and yet you think im jokin
stumbling on emotions

IP:

The way I feel has sunk beneath layers of forgotten years
Grabbed a hold of itself and pulled away from my sight
Why is it so difficult for me just to say the way I feel?
To be able to express myself, to talk from under all these tears.

I feel blinded from myself yet I can see your wondering face
And it fills my heart to see you when everything else is blurred
But what kind of relationship is it when I can’t express the way I feel
Im stumbling in mass confusion tripping over myself to keep up with my pace

This world is rotating to fast for me to stay running on this wheel
I’m like an exhausted little hamster inside a caged up boxed
With no exit I can open so I continue to run in circles after my thoughts
Trying to catch up with my inner self so perhaps my scars can heal

I’ve sat beside myself looking past my own gazing eyes to long
I wish to become one person again to think the way i did years ago
to wake up knowing just actually how i feel about this world that owns me
Instead of trying to find my self in written words that makes up my lifes song.

But now I have no melody
No music of any sort
My soul has been washed onto shore
While my mind still wanders in the sea......
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Old 12-15-03, 01:14 AM   #2
The Necromancer
Atra Ludio or Hip-Hop?
 
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From: Cottage Grove, Oregon
IP:

That was depressing.

But seriously, it was a good emotional release sort of peice. But it kind of doesn't lead to anything positive. It kind of leads to an emotional dead end, and that's what is depressing about it. I'd hate to be trapped in any sort of proverbial corner like that.

You were able to right this with such clairvoyence, you should be proud of that. Everything just seemed to fall into place and... damn if I wasn't in awe.

~Shalom~
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Old 12-15-03, 02:17 AM   #3
.Skribblez.
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From: NdotC
IP:

Quote:
Originally posted by The Necromancer
That was depressing.

But seriously, it was a good emotional release sort of peice. But it kind of doesn't lead to anything positive. It kind of leads to an emotional dead end, and that's what is depressing about it. I'd hate to be trapped in any sort of proverbial corner like that.

You were able to right this with such clairvoyence, you should be proud of that. Everything just seemed to fall into place and... damn if I wasn't in awe.

~Shalom~


Pretty much everything he said.. this was pretty much a good write not considering how depressing it was.. I feel as though you had tons of emotion and alot of negative feelings.. Maybe you got them out but writing this.. But besides that fact, this was a niice write.
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Old 12-15-03, 10:10 AM   #4
filed
Sharp Perfection.
 
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From: HELL!!....and yet you think im jokin
IP:

thank you both for your replies!!!! much appreciated!!!!!

~Tera~
DONT HATE
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Old 12-16-03, 12:34 PM   #5
HotRod
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this shit tight but sad as hell
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Old 12-17-03, 07:54 PM   #6
blyndedsoul
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Posts: 49
From: va
IP:

i like the way the 1st person put it an emotional dead end took the words right out my mouth...it does seem as tho its that way..and maybe the poem ended like that because you yourself moved on leaving those hurtful feelings behind? not too sure..just the way im taking it..
the poem itself was great i really liked your scheme for some reason it wasnt quite random but wasnt much patterned either
all in all im luvin it...keep this up..
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Old 12-17-03, 09:05 PM   #7
TheAnointeD
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IP:

i have to agree with the others when i say it was very emotional drop................damn good one though..
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