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Old 05-23-04, 09:12 PM   #1
Eclapt
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Behind The Clouds

IP: 03D2 F2E8

Grey Mist Of Thick Air
Cluttered Over My Face
Showing That No One Will Care
If I Ever Leave This place
For I Can't See Love Or Passion
A Road To Lead Into Arms
To Hold Me Showing Me Satisfaction
Of Lifes Gifts & Remote Charms
The Clouds Sometimes Damp
Getting Pieces Into My Throat
Try To Breath, I Hesitate, For I Can't
I'd Pray To God But To Speak I Choke
Wondering If Ever I Should Dream
Romance About Life & It's Wealth
Cloud Is Thick You Can't Hear Me Scream
Help, Me Find Away To Save Myself
Just A Nobody In Your Croud
Lost, Forgotton &, Unheard
Behind The Grey Cloud
Unworthy Of Giving Birth To My Word..
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Old 05-25-04, 10:15 PM   #2
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this is a short ass poem and 3 views...the fuck
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Old 05-25-04, 10:18 PM   #3
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Hmm need to make it Longer.
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Old 05-26-04, 08:09 AM   #4
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Could Use Some Better Vocab Too.
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Old 05-27-04, 07:56 AM   #5
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^^Two shittiest replies ever
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Old 05-27-04, 02:07 PM   #6
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i t was not that bad of a poem, if they have nothing good to say dun fuckin listen to em. ne way, u could of made it longer though. I thought it was a good topic to write about. I never really saw a relation of the title to the words of the poem. What i seen was your emtions mixed with clouds, an i don't think thats the point you were trying to get across. Other than that this was good, stayy thaa fuckk upp...
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Old 05-29-04, 08:54 PM   #7
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thanks for the good reply...stay up
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