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Old 05-06-04, 04:28 AM   #1
guyver4mk
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Posts: 255
Joined: Dec 2003
From: MK
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Its your life

IP: 0DB0 DEFE

In a world full of love, why let push come to shove/
At the drop of a glove wen all you really need is a hug/
From ya home boy, ya friend to the end/
Ya got time to spend to reminise and defend/
The message that I send is, the guns you should drop/
Your glock, an ya 5-5 before you get dropped by a cop/
Reach out ya hand to the community an stop procrasinating/
Delayin time is for pussies who's lives they be taking/
Put ya fists down, pick up a pen and fight with your mind/
That way you can make an impact and little kid's will find/
An education is more important than hustlin and pimpin/
But on their conscience it be stickin the sight of blood an pain/
So they do the shit again and again till its their life they took/
Nigga killed aged 12 by the gun, coulda gone somewhere if he jus picked up a book/
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Old 05-18-04, 10:02 AM   #2
MisFouND P.
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IP: E57C 347F

nice poem, nothing but the truth, but u wrote...

[Nigga] killed aged 12 by the gun, coulda gone somewhere if he jus picked up a book/

To some people that not considered a word, and some people cannot say that without gettin a bullet to the chest. kind of made the poem drop from something good to something that is only meant for the black family... which is all good but not only that family will read it/ i would of wrote.

[adolescent] killed aged 12 by the gun, coulda gone somewhere if he jus picked up a book/

makes a little bit more sense, we word the next 2 words after it, not only does it make it sound better, it makes u look a lil more intelligent as a writer. other than that that was a heavy poem, keep em coming, pce/
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