The Image Is.....

Po' Wit.

Stagnant stares into
portrait mirrors,
tell artist eyes
what to draw on
their empty pages.

The image so sharp,
the retinas bleed,
and red iris's sprint down
gaping cheeks,
jumping off chins' cliff edges
to a suicidal puddle
on wood-stain valley bottoms.

The image so confusing,
mouths struggle to
let lips reunite as
awe sknots in tangled tongues
and hangs itself on a
uvula noose
over dried tonsel valley bottoms.

The image so deceiving,
questions formulate but
remain chained and locked
behind thick enamel walls and
wander the cell blocks
of the minds prisoned thoughts.

Stagnant stares into
potrait mirros,
tell artist eyes
to scribble masterpieces
on their empty pages
filling with illustrations
and the literature...
An autobiography:
The Image is Me.

__________________

- Chryme Syndicate -

so
- S T F U -

it was definately vivid, seemed like the structure made it a quick read, but i guess there's nothing wrong with reading it again....like i said, very depictive, and descriptive, which is really what you want to accomplish, to capture, and it was pretty good....the only thing i felt didn't work, was your structure with the enhanced vocab, it made it feel like the thoughts were shortened....just me though

all-in-all, it was very good though, keep up

__________________

i loved the structure bro i even like using it gives the poem a nice feeling and smooth flow while reading, the emotion was okay i thought, you had excellent imagery in this very solid, the wording and vocab was decent...just keep at it man my boy po' wit is mos def gonna be rv's next big poet....so watch out peopl this kid means business

__________________