I stand there staring, the relationship has toppled..
Nestling, in the dust of it's supports & foundations..
I'm confused, a smokescreen of crushed love, blinding..
Broken hearts hanging from our words, expressionless..
Tears crawl down her cheek, I step & brush away..
For her spirit is now breaking, no words are uttered..
My throat stutters, & my tongue clutters my mouth..
Pupils confess, her eyes gleam with a hint of the ocean..
^^^deep shit here, alot of emotion. "My throat stutters, & my tongue clutters my mouth.." i like this line, its just something about it that has that little kick to it.

They wave with silence, our love bathing in the shallow end..
No words surrender the dense hush, just contemplating..
The next chapter of our attraction, shall it be revamped..
Or let it fall to its knees, & let a wilted rose seal our fate..
Glassed glaze of her face, shatters, revealing affection..
She caresses my palms, at this point; my heart embraces..
..An impact of depression, or a subtle stroke of warmth..
But a feeling snatches back her conclusion as if to say..
^^^these were also deep, very passionate, especially wur i founf it was passionate "They wave with silence, our love bathing in the shallow end..
No words surrender the dense hush, just contemplating.." this has emotion. mad wordplay.

That she cannot do it. Shes struggling as it is to speak..
Her once tranquil eyes, minimize, & a serious doubt arises..
Room is pressing in, trying to listen for her final verdict..
Our stemming love presented as a rose, is now rusting..
Fear, is what now grapples my conscience & I can't resist..
But with one swift withdrawel of her breathe, she swivels..
^^^o man, deep deep llines. i cant really say how much im loving this read, this has so much emotion that im feeling it. "But with one swift withdrawel of her breathe, she swivels", damn thats ill, nice lines.

Her feet shuffle rapidly, hair bounces & waves to say goodbye..
Thrashing her perfumed tears left & right, I'm in pieces..
On the floor, & it has never rejected me or felt so cold..
I'm alone, tormented by those tears she has dispersed..
& haunted...Haunted by that last image of her departure..
Out the gloomy doorframe, & proceeding out of my life..
^^^damn this is sad. it was so nice at the beginning then i really started to feel the pain that this person went through. "tormented by those tears she has dispersed" o man, very deep. '& haunted...Haunted by that last image of her departure..
Out the gloomy doorframe, & proceeding out of my life.." man, i can really feel this pain, and suffering.

this was nice you are really making a name for yourself.