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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
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| View Poll Results: Is This Piece Worthy Of Augusts Open Mic???... | |||
| Yes |
  
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22 | 91.67% |
| No |
  
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2 | 8.33% |
| Voters: 24. You may not vote on this poll | |||
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08-21-04, 07:18 PM
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#1
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1926
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August stand out - "Ironies Battlefield"
IP: A001 97D8
[[Verse One]]
*Laying In My Cot Inside The Tent* My head rests against my pillows while I still hold steps Dancing against thoughts of all the dead men that I’ve left Distressed in this dessert while I rest upon natures bold breast So cold yet, it's actually a high temp away from the wars mind set And I’ve let the past get trapped inside my minds back stash Say I’ve moved past when in fact my eyes re-pace every last pass Through these mass tracks tracked all over and past Iraq And how mass action has left more backs cracked then knapsacks And just ask back to your government who's loven it, "Who's Gonna Win?" Watch-in young men cover this terrorists one movement Losing tons of men, just a dime a dosen with no loves but government Shovin em to the fronts of a list to get killed as if genocide wasa gift Bombs all hit the tents adjacent as I pace this place of instant cremation Just an instant I was playing poker and facin the man now deterioratin I knew their names n all their ranks n now lays timid greatness All these thoughts creating so much hatred and it's seen in my patients As I walk tward the outdoors beyond my tents five foot tall doors My eyes fall tourn from thought to the four fronts of the front lines floor [[Chorus]] While My Thoughts Race... Remains Only One Question That Stains... My Mind Tarnished By Hate... Pump The Trigga, Leave These Killers Screaming In Horror... More For My Own Gain Now... So Many Inocents Killed So Its So Ironic How I Blow This Families House Down... [[Verse Two]] *Running Out To Battle* Burst out from my tent and duck down to avoid being struck down Feel the dust now under my guts pounds with gravel skraping my bust down Hear the one sound of help ring out lound as the medic rushed out See threw the dust cloud a woman stressed out as she screamed out lound Now I turn right and glance right at my guns and in-return fight Fire two to burn right threw this man with verbs as I obscure rights Just as quick i'm served tite breaths from a bullit that with every inch earns might "God Dammit!" I yell until I learn I only took a shot to suspend my femur's life As I saw the enemy break our strong hold and charge with bare arms Gurilla spars, no method to harm just all agression focused withought fair arms No guns, their amo was far from suficient in comparisins with our spair charms Just as the thought past I saw an image, that of man who had a gat withim No more sand packs to crouch behind or against, just me fighting off this attack with hands [[Chorus]] While My Thoughts Race... Remains Only One Question That Stains... My Mind Tarnished By Hate... Pump The Trigga, Leave These Killers Screaming In Horror... More For My Own Gain Now... So Many Inocents Killed So Its So Ironic How I Blow This Families House Down... [[Verse Three]] *Will I See Tomarrow?* Charging at me starting to put my guard up to retard his motives Look quickly to my right and start at my nife since I had no clips or bullits Pull it out and reach out to ground as I duck, jump and rip threw him Only gouging his shoulder as he pounced and hit me with brute fists Two hits to my face drops me like eight bricks slowing my pace But I caught his neck, leg behind his, lay him on the ground like he's tryn to pray Jump, sit on his stomach and smother his face with my gun butt Nocked him one with my knife across his neck, he was fucked Watch him bleed to death, swallow his last breath as I took off I layd this man to rest, but couldnt be phased so I shook off Looked tough in others eyes cuz I killed someone seezin strong sites But I presede to shun that witch is my units lease on life Cuz to me it's more like you play the game with whatever the pieces of life. [[Goodnight]] Now The Battle Comes To Hault Fields Clearing But My Pain Still Vaults... Hop This Horse And Pace The Brain... God Willing One Day I'll Move Away From Pain... But As For Tomarrow... I'll Break Again Scarred From Our War... |
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08-22-04, 07:34 PM
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#2
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1926
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IP: A001 97D8
Wow...
Slept To Def... .One. |
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08-22-04, 07:52 PM
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#3
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Umm...Yeah
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IP: 896E D654
hahahahah shit mayn that was dope................... your concept was amazing well............. your depth in the storytelling was dope.. your entire drop was amazing except..... that you mispelled some words............. thats basically your only flaw in this...... ummmmmmmm 9.2/10  http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=144314 you check the link already tho 
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08-22-04, 07:57 PM
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#4
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Simply Dope
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IP: 28AD 5545
That was real nice man i could picture the whole thing goin on in my head, the overall flow was good and your vocab helped your imagery... id say 8.5/10
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08-22-04, 07:57 PM
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#5
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Bonecrushing Nigga
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IP: C3C9 A5E9
Holy shi this is fucking fucking dope nice shit and nice structure i liked everything i think this is worthy for august open mic
__________________
Guess who?... ...Paramik Fuckin'...
...Owns You! ||RVS Text Champion||
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08-22-04, 07:57 PM
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#6
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E-Style, Bitch.
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IP: 24A3 0EF0
Yeah Yea...The Boy Has Talent...The Concept Of The Rhyme Was Sumthin Like A Genius, I Liked It Homeboy, Keep Doin Ya Thang..
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People Hate What They Can't Conquer |
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08-22-04, 08:33 PM
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#7
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IP: 258C A279
tha shit was hot man...got talent...keep it-up..
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..The Council..
7 Day Theory |
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08-22-04, 08:38 PM
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#8
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Tha 1st member of S.W.A
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IP: B525 44D9
yo, that had sum nice mulities holmes. that wuz dope, werd
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R.I.P. EAZY-E  MoBB Squad
 REST IN PEACE MY MUTHAPHUKKIN SPICCA OMB!!!
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08-22-04, 09:44 PM
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#9
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Paris Hilton Gone Crip
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IP: 3240 794D
the was some dope shit man the best of august all around nice 9.5/10no ones perfect lol but it was some dope shit rite there
__________________
A crip just like Bonecollector 
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08-23-04, 10:33 AM
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#10
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1926
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IP: A001 97D8
Upping...
.One. |
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08-25-04, 08:49 AM
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#11
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1926
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IP: A001 97D8
Upping...
.One. |
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08-25-04, 11:35 AM
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#12
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New to RB
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IP: E733 049C
well Abstrakt ur sheit is way beyond da sheit i've been reading so far u should get open mic for agust fo sho da way u made me invisison da way it all happen and i noe dat it did if not dang u made it seem like u lived thru it....structure wuz good sheit easy to read lyrical content wuz good too but good sheit in all...........gone
__________________
people talk but who listens.......i dont give a shit wat u think.............u dont mean shit to me.........but if u do mean sumthing............wat u think can destroy me...............da reason why i hav hatred.........is cuz i LOVE so much |
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08-25-04, 12:38 PM
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#13
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1926
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IP: A001 97D8
Thanks Playah...
And If You All Are Feeling This... Then Drop Me A Nomination In The "Nominations" Thread At The Top Of This Forums... I'm Gettin No Love Up There... .One. |
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08-25-04, 01:26 PM
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#14
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DA Dictionary
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IP: ABE5 5A5C
yo dat shit was kinda tight it had
nice wordplay n sum serious flow i was feeling it good shit dawg
__________________
PHP Code:
 OPEN BATTLES WORDPLAYA VS Word-Scape |
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08-25-04, 01:33 PM
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#15
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♡»..::[[.вlιиgαα.]]::..«♡
![[♡]_Fuck_you_ho's Avatar](image.php?s=8c0136e3c9dbe5fba212ba7ade218415&u=29691&dateline=1178098432)
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IP: 4C8F 0F5D
Quote:
^Going To Have To Agree With This Catt' Right Here..!!!!!! ... Concept Was Straight - & - Depth Was Safe ... Had A Few Mispelled Words.. - Nobodys Perfect lol.. Everybody Has 'Em Through-Out There Life Time.. - Very Minor....!!! - Wasn't To Harsh On Your Verse' ... 9.432/10 - Was A Nice Piece From You!
__________________
|[. You're annoying. Fuck off .]|
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