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View Poll Results: Who won this battle?
understatement 0 0%
DaGyrlRemarqabL 5 100.00%
Voters: 5. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
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Old 07-01-03, 02:04 PM   #1
deacon
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understatement vs DaGyrlRemarqabL

IP: 6270 F982

Understatement:

the colourful comic glinted in the sun of his window
and clark kent exited the phonebooth
leaping tall building in a single bound, looking for sinfuls
and defend the righteousness of the truth
gelling hair down over his forehead, a one lock disguise
and clark is no longer a newspaper man
but a hero fighting Lex Luther and killing his lies
Clark Kent turns has turned into superman

he closed the book, threw his blanket-cape on
and straightened his faded blue shirt
red underwear over his jeans didn't look wrong
he would show the world his worth
He opened the door of his 5th storey apartment
and proceeded to the climbing stairwell
he scaled the stairs, and up with him his heart went
he was bidding normality sad farewell

he stepped onto the roof, and the sun blinded his vison
only for an instant, then he got to the task at hand
there was no choosing, he had already made his decison
this normal little boy was going to be superman
as he approached the ledge, the sky above him fullest
he knew that his destiny was going all around
flourishing his cape, jumping faster than a speeding bullet
the little boy lodged himself into the ground.....

It's a bird, it's a plane...It's superman
added: sorry, I went a little over!
Peace




DaGyrlRemarqabL:

A tear drops on the shiny page of her magazine,
"Seventeen"..perfect eyes stare a gleam of bright green,
back in her own... She stares hard at the small waiste, unflawed face,
'til more tears trace her face, and she sees in the mirror: a disgrace.
She holds in her stomache to try and 'model' perfection,
and breaks the glass that reveals her rejected reflection.
"Who will love-me?..Guys like size two's with eyes' blue,"
"Im so ugly..so fat, having thighs like i do.."
She would say. And with that, She'd throw up every pound,
that would make her more hideous, and only "weigh her down".
And every girl on TV, body perfect in detail,
would make her skip another meal, then get back on the scale.
Now getting frail, she lost the weight,but she wasn't stopping there,
She was also losing her mind,...along with her hair..
And a piece of her heart, broke off and went up,
with every ounce of blood she continually coughed up.
Her face appeared to be caving-in,
and her rib cage poked through her pale fading-skin
She had to be thin, and fit in, but it was tough,
cuz the magazines showed her she'd never be good enough.
And since she was too blind to see the beauty in herself,
she neglected her mental and physical health,
until she didnt have to battle her body anymore,
when, weak and unmoving, she collapsed on the floor.
If only the media could have told her the truth:
(and the rest of the youth, instead of being so uncouth)
That your mind, your soul, and spiritual perserverance,
'reflect' more of one than their outward 'appearance'.
But media lies, and its pressures will equal the demise,
of young girls paying to be beautiful, at the cost of their lives
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Old 07-01-03, 02:37 PM   #2
deacon
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alright these two pieces were nice.......You both brought up similar points to your topics. Media "does it depict truth ?" In many cases we'd all agree it has supernatural tendencies for the young and the old. Both topics had severe results that may not be typical but do happen... Understatement in your piece you had child like faith written all over it....Its crazy to think that this really has happened..wow I think i jumped off of my garage in attempt to fly...DaGyrlRemarqabL yours was sad but true i've watched sally and i've seen these exact outcomes happen to not only women but men as well.You both had nice pieces and the topic was tough...i'll have my final thoughts later..i need to over read and over read

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Old 07-03-03, 08:00 PM   #3
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Alright my Vote goes to DaGyrlRemarqabL.......Reason: Both were great pieces read my thoughts above.

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Old 07-06-03, 10:58 PM   #4
shiznit
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Shiznit's Thoughts:

As far as i can remember i used to always think im a super hero myself when i was a kid...*reminiscin* hehe...i remember one time when my mom was at the hospital gaving birth to my brother *shakes head* i wore this "super girl" costume i was like 4 or 5 yrs old back then and i was at the the hospital running down the halls ...it was funny!...(so much for my childhood memories >LOL)

childhood fantasies from superman to peterpan to captain america to spiderman to incredible hulk to xmen and even to power rangers..lol its just part of life ya kno...and understatement's piece made me realize that in his piece...such good imagery..such passion...the rhyme scheme was very unique..its alternate-rhymes....incredible!

*************************************************


Being a girl...thats definitely hard..although to many people being a female is just so easy as they think it is....well guess what? ITS NOT!

In this world of imperfection...females are the dominant species that constantly react to the rapid growth of beautifulness...

in short...they practice perfection and they would do almost ANYTHING just so that they would feel good about themselves or feel sexy anyway they can...but they just dont realize that they already have it inside them...they just reject the unfamiliar...

just like what they say..."beauty is in the eye of the beholder"...beauty is not about being slim...sexy...having a great hair..tight ass...big breasts...nice smile...having tons of make up...*shakes head* beauty is whats inside each and every heart of any girl in this whole damn world...we are soo unique in many ways...but for some reason media : magazine, tv, radio, internet...they always make it appoint that they make ppl feel bad about themselves so that they would sell something and put some dough in their pockets...its shameful but thats life.

but besides all that dagyrl made me see something sooo real and true and that it really happens...that there are billions of females out there who are sooo conscious about themselves that they would risk something that its not even worth risking for...

both great pieces...its really hard for me to choose between those...but because of the real life effect of dagyrl's piece...i think she deserves to win this one...

....i really enjoyed these guys!...*sigh* such GREAT writers!
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Old 07-06-03, 11:36 PM   #5
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My vote was going to DaGyrl as well, but since she already won with 2 votes my drawn out explination isn't needed (thankfully ) Nice pieces from both of you. DaGyrl moves on to the finals.
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