its not much not even 16 bars

My rymes are promised tighter than a fat head with cornrows*1/ only the lord knows, come striaght at ya face wit hard blows/(whoa!) do you whats in my future when it unfolds/my name success for a reason achievin evry one of my goals/can't preform on stage mike'll melt cuz im so hot/ leave you like my nike have your tongue in fuckin knots*2/ I can make pankaces all I need is a piar of boots/ watch out you could be the one I'm scrapin of my shoes*3/

1. A fat head with cornrows is tight

2. a shoe has a tongue you tie

3. i step on you to make pancakes

.........................uupin feed......................

............quit sleepin yall.........

i shouldn't of named the tittle this!

...................uppin...................

lol, dont explain what ur lines mean and fix ur structure.. its newbish..
also, its not long enough but eh your newbish...

this really needs to be longer, you did a good job glorifying yourself but if you brought this to battle you'd get wrecked because you need punchlines for a battle.. decent flow though and not terrible vocab, you have potential just keep working at it..

pz

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this was VERY basic...and yu structure is fucked lol..here is how you should post btw...its easier

My rymes are promised tighter than a fat head with cornrows
only the lord knows, come striaght at ya face wit hard blows
(whoa!) do you whats in my future when it unfolds
my name success for a reason achievin evry one of my goals
can't preform on stage mike'll melt cuz im so hot
leave you like my nike have your tongue in fuckin knots
I can make pankaces all I need is a piar of boots
watch out you could be the one I'm scrapin of my shoes

and elevate...use more vocab, multis and rearrange your wordply to get the mostof your bars...return the favor on my sig's links

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you dont tie toungues, you tie laces...
pretty basic, fix ya structure too

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i'll play on ya consience, ya contents is complete nonsense
speak of biting, then you fucks flip everyone of my damn concepts
what the fuck, was you high..?
did you think i wouldn't recognize lines that i made
then you come up some bullshit tryna prove that im gay...!
.
.
fake fucks..move on...!