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Old 05-06-05, 04:10 AM   #1
Lyrical Prodigy
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From: Originally from Chi Town but I'm in Funky Town now
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Post Glimpse Inside My Life

IP: 744C D310

Armed with only his mind and his pen and pad
Refusing to conform with the next hot trend or fad
Everyone becommin jealous of this young lad
Who gets no support from a single soul especially mom and dad

Brushin it off cuz he has to look after him
Can't rely on no one else, not even his kin
Constantly misunderstood by peers cuz he's a blend

Between black and white, he's got the best of both worlds
Niggas green wit envy cuz he's steady pullin all the girls
Whether he is rockin braids or some irressistable curls
Never reluctant to throw peoples minds in downward swirls

He's subject to correct
A mistep but don't fret
This aint the monogolistic

Part of this poetic verse
Don't try and throw my words in reverse
Or you face being placed under a detrimental curse

In which you will be forced to learn the art of rhyme
I'll have white boys rockin FUBU instead of Kevin Kline
And have brothas spittin the trusth instead of they cheap pick up lines

He can't wait to reach the light at the end of the tunnel ahead
Cuz for love, for life, and for freedom and understanding he's bled
Theoretically speaking of course, cuz his soul is one of the many walking dead

He's only 15 yrs of age but with habitualness he acts like an adult
Too mature for his age but not wise enough to join their prestigious cult
Rejected by his age group for understanding the world where as they wanna revolt

Thus making him envisage that he's the one to blame
All he wants is love and intellection not popularity and fame
But because he walks his own path he's instantly deemed a shame

It's not a good feeling to be alone with a sense of mirthlessness
After being told so many times, you believe in your worthlessness
People saying "You're no good", -smh-, what a hurtful dis

Yet he keeps his chin up and battles through the Pyrrhonism
Leaving looks of shock and disbelief when he rebutes the skepticism
Living HIS life for HIM, for I'm no longer a victim of altruism
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Old 05-11-05, 09:56 AM   #2
Calm
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From: Eye of The Storm
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Text Record: 2-2
IP: 5DFD E17C

this was aiight. not real creative but the point got across. just sum lines i wasnt feelin too much. felt sorta like an open mic rather then a poem. maybe thats why i was really feelin it. i dunno. cant quite put my finger on it. but i see what u were trying to say with this one keep writing
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-Transcending The Heavens-
I am before before...
Before death is eternity, After death is eternity.
There is no death, only eternity.
And I be riding the wings of eternity...



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3 Poems.:.3 Features.:.3 Weeks Consecutively
I'm a Bad Man
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Old 05-12-05, 11:32 AM   #3
fluidmoon
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yes, i agree with calm on this too, did have an open mic feel to it..you could have used some different vocabulary and maybe spiced it up abit, seems kind of bland,like its missing something, but it was alright, keep dropping.1
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