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02-15-09, 12:40 AM | #1 | |||
...i'm da nicest...
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IP:
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its overly simplistic.like one "verse" should be like one or two lines....u didnt take the idea far enough for me.then u just throw something in at the end where u were going with it the whole time.but u should have elaborated more. it was just too short,too simple,vocab was just very elementary.i'm guessing u were trying to be unique so i'll give u a point for that correct me if i'm wrong,cuz i always fuckin hated poetry in school but i believe u are tryin to say u're a dog inside n u wanna fuck around but u cant cuz of ur chick i mean.......i just think u could have done more with the idea of it....................................
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us waiver, waiver, us entry waiver, criminal record travel, denied entry us |
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02-15-09, 12:42 AM | #2 | |||
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IP:
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Actually, your breakdown is completely opposite. It's about having fucked another girl while being in a relationship and the feeling of regret you have to keep a secret. But nice try, I'll give you a point for that. |
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02-15-09, 12:44 AM | #3 | ||
Can u guess 2v's Gender?
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IP:
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it's always nice knowing the writer can understand his own poetry and know what hes trying to say..... |
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02-15-09, 12:20 AM | #4 | ||
Rather Unique
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IP:
You're right
I have more than one Cuz 1 just wont do. haha got me feeling good now http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVYza0NiWuU |
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02-15-09, 12:29 AM | #5 | ||
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IP:
I won't break them down, but you can't half ass a poem better than everybody here.
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02-15-09, 12:33 AM | #6 | ||
Can u guess 2v's Gender?
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IP:
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thats old shit Adam shit i wrote when i 1st got into poetry. |
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02-15-09, 12:31 AM | #7 | ||
...i'm da nicest...
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IP:
i'm not a poetry head but i can see that he can half ass a poem better then u,especially seeing that u think that dog shit is the best u got
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us waiver, waiver, us entry waiver, criminal record travel, denied entry us |
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02-15-09, 12:33 AM | #8 | |||
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IP:
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I don't think it's the best I got, I keyed it off the dome and if you can explain it to me in your next post, I'll believe your criticism. |
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02-15-09, 12:44 AM | #9 | ||
...i'm da nicest...
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IP:
actually whats in ur mind n what u actually wrote down do not coincide.
that is why i said u should have said more......................................maybe to u it made sense but to me it was just soundin like u wanted to fuck around. edit** i guess once u explain it i can kind of see where u were going,but u shouldnt really have to explain a poem
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us waiver, waiver, us entry waiver, criminal record travel, denied entry us |
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02-15-09, 12:45 AM | #10 | |||
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IP:
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I put him in there myself Thinking it would be fine, But I was wrong. I wasn't misled Or unconscious, Nor intoxicated So I'd have an excuse. I put him in there myself, I wasn't thinking of you. ^ I think that pretty much sums up that something happened and it's not a feeling of wanting to do something. But once again, nice try. |
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02-15-09, 12:48 AM | #11 | |
Can u guess 2v's Gender?
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IP:
And Wtf @ Rv now having another Poetry of choice.
Slam Poetry... |
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02-15-09, 12:48 AM | #12 | ||
...i'm da nicest...
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IP:
or one can interpret that as the IDEA or THOUGHT of wanting to cheat......
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us waiver, waiver, us entry waiver, criminal record travel, denied entry us |
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02-15-09, 12:49 AM | #13 | |||
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IP:
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If you're an idiot. I put him in there myself That's a doing word, not a thinking of doing word. |
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02-15-09, 12:51 AM | #14 | ||
Can u guess 2v's Gender?
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IP:
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Well thanks for taking the time to discipline us all at Rv about Vocabulary. |
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02-15-09, 12:53 AM | #15 | |||
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IP:
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You're welcome, hopefully you fucking learned something. |
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