RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > Back Stage > Concluded Tournaments > InGenius Scriptures
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

 
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 01-21-05, 04:47 PM   #1
FlowIntelligent.
The Epitome Of Greatness
 
FlowIntelligent.'s Avatar
 
Posts: 4,868
Joined: Jan 2004
From: NY ... Born And Raised
Status: Offline
Text Record: 55-26
~Babylon~ Vs. Verbal Abuse (Middleweight Championship Match)

IP: 0825 899A

Rules:

Battles Go Up Friday
Check In Due Sunday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time
Verses Due Tuesday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time
Voting Ends Thursday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time

20 Lines Minimum
40 Lines Maximum

No Biting
No Recycling
Do Not Go Over The Line Limit Or Under The Line Limit
Meaning No Less Than 20 Lines No More Than 40 Lines

You Must Vote On 3 Battles Per Week And Edit Them Into Your Check-In.. If You Dont Do So, Youre Banned From The Tourney The Following Week


Topic : Forever Changed
__________________
RV's Only 3 Time Topical Tourney Champion


Send a message via AIM to FlowIntelligent.  
Old 01-21-05, 04:58 PM   #2
~Babylon~
~Lyrical Nirvana~
 
~Babylon~'s Avatar
 
Posts: 1,635
Joined: May 2004
From: Newark,NJ
Status: Offline
IP: 3240 794D

check............................................. ....
__________________
Send a message via AIM to ~Babylon~  
Old 01-22-05, 01:52 AM   #3
eph
As Seen On T.V.
 
Posts: 1,498
Joined: May 2004
Status: Offline
IP: 5867 FD83


Last edited by eph : 01-27-05 at 12:46 AM.
 
Old 01-23-05, 03:43 AM   #4
eph
As Seen On T.V.
 
Posts: 1,498
Joined: May 2004
Status: Offline
IP: 5867 FD83

Forever Changed

a truely shallow story

[setting : algebra]

awoke just the same...as the day prior today's eve.
the next dawn would be different, only in ways i can dream.
shed sit along side of me, and i lean...over and feed her whispers.
my eyes in a coma, cause her ora's like misdemeanor liquor.
intent to blink & kiss her. what i need is a matchmaker.
all those pity laughs i gave her & not to mention the mass paper.
the sweet & surene letters... ive written, since ive met her.
lines like..." your my dr. pepper, cause ya make my world taste better."
you might not have noticed, but every chapter test...
...i inch my paper closer to yours, but you wont cheat i guess.
i like that best about you, your candid... & most def independent.
ya beauty is evident, cause i fell in love with you in less than a minute.
member that day i was late to class, just to catch your eye.
i asked for a hug, then the class replied with laughter high.
& ya didnt say a word. but ya popularity is not of my concern.
i dont care if ya had a thousand valentines, im your crush for sure.
i sit in math just comtemplatin'...exactly how long ive wated.
im not asking for marriage, all i need is some conversation.
the other day i... stomped ya pic into the pavement.
just so i could kiss your wounds. in time my patience...
..will flood the faces, i have ever exiled in life.
cause you distill every thought that is not heavenly like.
your presence circulates the nerves inside.
when our focus aligns...even the glare off ya eyes is divine.
i held the door for you, everyday for the past semester.
and since september, ive been able to stand the pressures.
we're flawless intwine, the way we met was no accident.
perhaps it ment...much more to me, half cause im abstinent.
ocassionally you catch on... so i play my tricks & call.
never to fail myself or the hex, i pretended withdrawl.
problem solved...all i had to do, was put on an act.
front i didnt feel you, and let your heart react.
motivated my week, so i kept acting for a month.
still under a hunch...sucessfully i didnt stare at ya once.
i began to experience self control again, like shrek...
...it didnt take fluke or obeasity to force our connect.
my attempts to date you, are now non existant...their sober.
ive moved on to pure infatuation, hence...friendships over.
ive fallen for a different person, shes actually worth it.
not cause shes not virgin, its that her photo fits in my wallet perfect.



g'luck bab.
 
Old 01-25-05, 09:23 PM   #5
~Babylon~
~Lyrical Nirvana~
 
~Babylon~'s Avatar
 
Posts: 1,635
Joined: May 2004
From: Newark,NJ
Status: Offline
IP: 28AD 5545

"forever changed - a son's demise"






smiles and fun, a child in slums, wild and young
a father looking after his last child and son
but with these books i read, he shook his head
took instead, said, i should be a crook instead
theres no time to learn when chased by a jake or a fed
still shaking his head, says,"son they takin' our bread
so he turned to the streets, hustlin', burnin' his heat
and i sat back and watched as a kid, still learnin to speak
he turned my mother to crack, soon burnin' a sack
i tuned it out, but soon i doubt will ever be able to chat


now he stay on the run, always palmin' a gun
headed for the darkside of the hood, all for his son
and the rock would soon crack him, siruns flashin'
lying and laughin', but soon becomes crying and askin'
when will i see my son? or my wife and daughter
this is my demise, lost love of my only father
hated my self, but really just screaming for help
couldn't deal the cards from the deck i was delt
abandoned and left i felt, building up this aggression
fathers lessons questioned, lookin' for hell, forgott heaven


soul has lost luster, hatered building, lost mother
i turned my back on her, life paused to suffer
sister never talked, now all she does is scream
lust of schemes,showed the streets, ajusted my means
this life im sickened to pick it, this and prison visits
turn visions to critics, dreams lost, now im crippin to git it
I'm the son of Guy, happy doesnt last, and funs a lie
the victim of a system that loves to see a sons demise
dark clouds hover over me, will this weather sustane
felt severed and maimed, lost child, forever changed







~Babz~
__________________
Send a message via AIM to ~Babylon~  
Old 01-28-05, 12:24 AM   #6
Compose
 
Posts: 1,382
Joined: Jul 2004
From: Bronx, NY
Status: Offline
IP: D5FE 7245

ill vote on this battle tomorrow so it will be a 1-0 KO if nobody else votes...
__________________
The Council
Most Recent Funniest Line
"I dont go to malls cuz i dont like shoppin
I cant buy clothes when the manikins are watchin" -Canibus
 
Old 01-28-05, 12:50 PM   #7
Compose
 
Posts: 1,382
Joined: Jul 2004
From: Bronx, NY
Status: Offline
IP: D5FE 7245

Verbal Abuse.......i really think that should be in some kind of hall of fame...it was one of the best topical verses ive ever read ever...

flow-tie, this was too hard both of you had an amazing flow...with the amount of vocab and detail you guys had shit was ill...

imagery-Verbal Abuse, practically the whole verse shined on imagery...the words you used it was just amazing...theres not much more to say on this you basically had all of imagery...babylon you had some too but it just wasnt as much...

emotion-Verbal Abuse babylons verse i didnt really sense emotion...when i was reading it it just felt like you were talking but didnt use the right wording to make it more emotion...verbals verse was great seeing as it was a better story...there were significant parts in the verse that made me feel like ...wow thats deep...

beginning/end-Verbal Abuse, the beginning was good on both basically a tie but the ending is what shined on verbals part...i loved that ending it had a spark to it...

but both did tremendously well...i just felt Verbal Abuse had more of everything overall for a fantastic verse...

Favorite Lines:

Babylon-
lust of schemes,showed the streets, ajusted my means
this life im sickened to pick it, this and prison visits


Verbal Abuse-
i sit in math just comtemplatin'...exactly how long ive wated.
im not asking for marriage, all i need is some conversation
__________________
The Council
Most Recent Funniest Line
"I dont go to malls cuz i dont like shoppin
I cant buy clothes when the manikins are watchin" -Canibus
 
Old 01-28-05, 12:52 PM   #8
Compose
 
Posts: 1,382
Joined: Jul 2004
From: Bronx, NY
Status: Offline
IP: D5FE 7245

Verbal Abuse wins by KO

Verbal Abuse +5
Babylon -3
__________________
The Council
Most Recent Funniest Line
"I dont go to malls cuz i dont like shoppin
I cant buy clothes when the manikins are watchin" -Canibus
 
 


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:45 AM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.