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Old 08-29-05, 12:22 AM   #1
2Fast2Furious
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Politicz

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Increasing intensity of something with vast density
Toying with an entity that isn’t real smart of man.
Blapshemes and hypocrites aren’t in fair standing in
this land.
Laying down their mighy hand trying to rule the world
While we sit back and watch this monstrosity unfurl
Do they not hear the cries of the weak and young?
They have souls of a murderer and eyes of ice
they will sell each other if they get a right price.

But yet they reign supreme like eagles on sunbeams
Raising the bar, eating up power, listening to
cha ching in a tower.
While the rich get richer and the poor get poorer
The dumb get dumber and the whore gets whorer.
Where do we end? Where do we start?
The world needs reform. God is all we got.

Each day we wake up in our own little worlds, not really
seeing the tragedy that be wilds,
Nothing in this world is beautiful anymore, all replaced
by technology, slums and polluted shores.
The Earth is screaming “mutiny” and we aren’t even
using scrutiny because once we’re gone its all we’ve got,
save for a little piece of a 6 foot deep plot.

But yet they reign supreme like eagles on sunbeams
Raising the bar, eating up power, listening to
cha ching in a tower.
While the rich get richer and the poor get poorer
The dumb get dumber and the whore gets whorer.
Where do we end? Where do we start?
The world needs reform. God is all we got.

Try to strive in this land we’ve made, even though
it daily fades.
With tasteless shows of gays on parade
We drink and kill the young each day.
What has become of the USA?
Great ol’ American flag on display,
can we hit rewind and edit the mistakes?
Will God wipe us out because we’re too similar
to Sodom and Gomorrah, think about it and
it might seem a little clearer.
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Old 08-29-05, 12:42 AM   #2
TIME IZ MONEY
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vocab..........is nice

was o k
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Old 08-29-05, 12:46 AM   #3
Christianite
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this was pretty good, flow was good, topic was good, vocab and wordplay were ok, structure was ok, overall pretty good read, keep it up
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i come from a time when you earned respect,
for your rhyme and the way you made words connect,
not the money that you made or the girls you sexed,
a concept you obviously haven't heard of yet
Mars Ill
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Old 08-29-05, 01:07 AM   #4
Dickard.
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THIS piece was mad good, i felt ya concept...had good flow......good imagery and emotions.....ya problem still remains.......u need help on ya structure.......ull get it one day 5.5/10......rtf
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Old 08-29-05, 01:23 AM   #5
2Fast2Furious
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lol, thank ya'll 4 the feed, real appreciative, uppin
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I'm not the status quo stereotype you want me to be.
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Old 08-29-05, 04:51 PM   #7
Kawn Flixx
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Closed no link....
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Old 08-29-05, 09:26 PM   #8
2Fast2Furious
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__________________


Sig Provided by: Christianite

3 nails + 1 cross = 4given
No matter how good you are there's always someone better.
I'm not the status quo stereotype you want me to be.
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