RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > Fresh From The Lab > Textual Releases > Poetic Scriptures
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 02-20-09, 08:32 PM   #1
SnoCap
Light Weight
 
SnoCap's Avatar
 
Posts: 364
Joined: Feb 2009
From: New York
Status: Offline
Text Record: 2-3
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
Post !Addiction!

IP: 2210 2F31

So, you've dabbled in cocaine, smoking cigarrettes and even need your weed...
And its funny how free you can be after a few hits of LSD...
But you found yourself in a mess when, your life became gloom...
And Now you have to answer all those questions that came to you on shrooms...
But its your life, and you tell yourself this is not how its going to end...
Untill that one "true friend" introduces you to heroin...


Now, you take one little sniff,
ingulfed in a bliss
and this is your God send...
but your stomach's in pits,
here comes the vomit
and you say "never again"...
You see, ya friends become slaves for
that which they pay for
and you're glad you departed...
Well, the pain hits your mental
you begin romancing those chemicals
now you're back where you started...
Still, you say "its just pills"
How is it relevant to the matter?...
you have will power
but your money is low and you go searching for the powder...
Now shes got her revenge
You go on a binge
and without it you start to cringe...
you get a pin, stick it in your skin
and find the glamour in a syringe...
wrapped up in sin
you start to rob for the bucks...
Just to get ya hands on that which has made you corrupt...
you have no reason to live
and no remorse for what you have done...
Untill that one day you see the man you've become...
So you try to kick it
you try to fix it
But withdrawal sets in...
Now you're screaming in pain
you've played her little game...
Just another victem...
cramps, diarreah, puke, cold chills, hot sweats "I cant sleep and it hurts"...
You've never felt this bad a day on the earth...
Now you flea to your peers for some positive feedback...
But they look at you with disgust, and you go on to relapse...
Now you pray every day for it to go away
and ask God why you havent been saved...

God says "you are below average, you took her in marriage, So you might as well take her to the grave..."



http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=248896
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=248658
Send a message via AIM to SnoCap   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-09, 11:22 PM   #2
Cola
Pushin it....
 
Cola's Avatar
 
Posts: 7,966
Joined: Nov 2006
From: Round tha way
Status: Offline
Text Record: 6-1
Audio Record: 1-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: C019 9845

i liked alot of the lines, cuz the poem is very deep

and obviously i know what you'r goin through

but

Now you flea to your peers for some positive feedback...
But they look at you with disgust, and you go on to relapse...


line, was dope for real


nice drop man, stay sober and keep spitting
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lysol
But Eminem is the best.





Destroyin Tricks on the Daily


  Reply With Quote
Old 02-22-09, 01:41 AM   #3
Its CJ
Maggot
 
Posts: 161
Joined: Nov 2008
From: V.a.
Status: Offline
IP: 3240 794D

that was good cuz.
RV is acctually starting to get up again.
keep with what your doing because its talent
__________________
Rip H.P. and A.M.H.
Rep The Pep
Rap clicks online? Wackkk.
-The B.E.S.T. Crew? haha
ya'll niggas on some eli porter shit.
Send a message via AIM to Its CJ   Reply With Quote
Old 02-22-09, 09:23 PM   #4
Alphabetized
New Jack
 
Posts: 374
Joined: Feb 2007
Status: Offline
Text Record: 0-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: A1E4 9BCF

Quote:
wrapped up in sin
you start to rob for the bucks...
Just to get ya hands on that which has made you corrupt...
you have no reason to live
and no remorse for what you have done...
Untill that one day you see the man you've become...



Good drop dude, interesting take on the topic.
I liked how you working all the drugs in and really
captured what it's like when your getting off the hard shit.

Keep droppin son.
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-09, 03:48 AM   #5
50Cal.
STROBE's Favorite Rapper
 
50Cal.'s Avatar
 
Posts: 11,051
Joined: Aug 2004
From: New York
Status: Offline
Text Record: 62-23
Audio Record: 9-2
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 0FA0 9C00

this was good but it could be better.dont try to flow like rap so much.the purpose of poem if to able to write without guideline.certain line should be longer.try adding a few words to the shorter lines to touch it up.nice emotion here and vividness.overall good drop that just needs minor work.
__________________
Overall Rapverse Record Including Leagues

94-29
R.I.P RAPVERSE
Send a message via AIM to 50Cal.   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 12:55 PM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.