Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
01-25-06, 04:19 PM | #1 | ||||||
Whys That?
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Poetic Karma
IP: 5285 DC82
Poetic karma
Link 1 Link 2 Lyrics take a moment to look into the eyes of the closet freind that will depise your rise the one that sheds tears inside ut hides his crys willing to stab a knife thru your thorat just to rid of your vocals What your looking into is the reflection of your self, arch nemisis returning for war last time you killed him you left blood on you knife allowing DNA to reform his life now hes coming for you, unstopable breaking his stride is like the impossible carrying more disease's than a african hospital, whats its costing for protection about as much as helen payed to let the hoe win the election,he got you buy the balls like a papnue guinea tribal infection, you thrive on neglection thru his exsitstance, but when it comes down to it. theres no such thing as his resitance time taking your minds breaking i find mistakes while your kinds shaking poisen your heart thought raping distraught lacing eye rate pacing thru poetic karma Coughing up blood clots of fear, your own thoughts stay damaging your health now alone cold shivering middle of the night your only hope is yourself whatelse can you do, when a horror comes true and the cameras on you spot light full beam each shot extracting your self esteem your minds racing with fear,blood pouring from your jaws causing your mouth to gleam he said he would have his revenge one way or another, one day or another todays 19 of december, the day of his birth and resurection, breaking the locks to facility labeled correction hes alive here to stay here for revenge and certain death on those who disbeleived deceived hes leaving your family to greive so breath! before before he takes your lungs away speak on him again and you wont see another day time taking your minds breaking i find mistakes while your kinds shaking poisen your heart thought raping distraught lacing eye rate pacing thru poetic karma now whats left of your soul, your lifes been stripped ripped of everything you love no time to pray above, god doesnt feel remorse, pause and pray for the presence of a dove face to face with the man you once hated, moments been reversed like below 5th gear the smell of dirt fills the air no ones here your fears not present like a broke chirsmas the joke is this guy was once the kid you hated while simply tryna learn the streets swinging flames to your chest the burn is deep like the hole pre dug for your body to fit face drowning in the bottom it remains bloody as shit realising now This is karma generated by the nuttiest kid heart beating struggles to generate life like a broken respirorater fuck it i gotta go finish the job, ill write the rest of this later time taking your minds breaking i find mistakes while your kinds shaking poisen your heart thought raping distraught lacing eye rate pacing thru poetic karma |
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01-25-06, 04:37 PM | #2 | ||||
L.E
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IP: 2EF1 1720
Listening...
I used this beat... Wow...your flow is all over the place . Following your lyrics...it' sounds like your sorda on beat at first glance...but you have to mad shorten your lines so it fits on beat. Delivery is decent...doesn't sound like your too comfortable though. With some work on your flow, you would be sick. Keep at it. RTF http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=220491 Feed used 1/30/06 "Fall Back" Last edited by will appear : 02-01-06 at 06:44 PM. |
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01-25-06, 05:20 PM | #3 | |||||||
pSa - We Ridin Harder Then Blondes
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IP: 0AC8 1559
at the beginin u were on the beat nicely but u fell off, and didnt get back on for a while..
lyrics r hot, but try to shorten ure shit u stretching it alot. beats cool deliverys cool mic presence iight ure voice is wierd..do u have an accent? sounds like it.. anyways tracks decent, keep practicin and ull get better cause u def got potential. http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=220500 RTF^^
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Last edited by Shawn Phillips : 01-25-06 at 05:27 PM. |
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01-25-06, 05:29 PM | #4 | ||||
FuxJustAWord
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IP: FF5C 8D5B
u didnt wait up for me?!?! impatient mutha fucka
i was gonna do the hook tonight....... like right now, lol |
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01-25-06, 05:47 PM | #5 | ||||||
Whys That?
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IP: 5285 DC82
lol, my bad bro. I just assumed you didnt want to do it.
leave feed bro. |
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01-26-06, 08:03 PM | #6 | ||||||
Whys That?
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IP: 5285 DC82
up.
Will return all feed. |
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01-26-06, 08:17 PM | #7 | |||||
P.S.A**DYNASTY
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IP: 8630 C252
listining...........................
intros cool................................. beats dope was gonna use it but too many people did lol............ flows nice .................................. deleveryz nice with yer lines(which i dont find strectched) emotionz good....................... i could hear u tryin to catch yer breath thou(i just fixed my breath control latly) lyrics r dopeness.......str8 fiya............................. voice is good(and difrent) u switched yer flow up on this one dopeness....... quality was good.............................. overall dope track.....................this ones goin on my ipod werdizzle 9/10 rtf on my song fresh like me eazy 1
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trakk star aka non fixion
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01-27-06, 04:18 AM | #8 | ||||
Bann The Deed NOT The Breed
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IP: C2F3 608C
ill elave feed tommorow
ur 1st link is invalid
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O.Y.D. |
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01-27-06, 11:35 AM | #9 | |||||||
The Alternative MC
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IP: 4702 1F81
beat is real tight i'm feelin it...yeah u got skills...emotion is good...put a little more on the hook cuz it sounds ill with a CB type distortion...at least thats what it sounds like...this wa pretty good.
peep me:http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=220467
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I'M ILLER THAN YOU "Im bout to make it famous, so you can take you J-O-B and shove up your anus" -Techn9ne "I knew god hated me, created me, and threw me on a planet thats afraid of me"-Ill Bill "Hit bongs bigger than indoor pools On treez like ewoks screamin "Endor Rules"-Fo'tryll "Ur only alive till ur dead"-Royce 5'9" www.soundclick.com/fo'trill |
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01-27-06, 03:19 PM | #10 | |||||
New to RV
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IP: E927 7EEE
aight dis beats pretty tuff...lyricz is str8...flows choppy needs sum work coulda been more on point...deliverys coo tho...da hooks aiight not dat bad...overall dis track was coo nahmean...keep it up
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01-30-06, 12:25 AM | #11 | |||||||
Whys That?
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IP: 5285 DC82
Quote:
you deleted my feedback Thank for the feed, ill return all favours. |
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01-30-06, 09:30 AM | #12 | |||||
Is Betta Than You
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IP: 7A52 73B1
dope track, the lyrics are dope as hell, delivery straigt, flow is straight, do u have a pop filter? sounds like u dont, and i can hear you catching ur breath alot, try recording 2-3 lines at a time then mixing them all down, overall dope track, lovin this beat
RTF http://community.rapverse.com/showt...618#post2638618 |
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01-30-06, 02:18 PM | #13 | |||||||
©
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IP: B21E C91D
Listening:
Beat is nice but is way to played Lyrics are always nice with ya tracks Flow and Delivery can be improved by shorten your lines Pressence will come when ya drop more, you cunt keep it up! |
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01-30-06, 07:11 PM | #14 | |||||
The Paragraph President
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IP: 8733 3D5C
The beat is fa sho a dope one. first thing I noticed was your quality and your pronounciation was off....quality, you need to learn how to mix a lil better and the hook needs to stand out a lil more. your lines are streched way to much and that might be the reason to why your pronounciation is so horrible. this is the best you've done yet but I still think you need to learn a bit more. I didn't really understand what you were trying to say on this track. not really a boasting track or a story track. what is it about?
anyway it's alright keep workin at it man. 1
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01-31-06, 03:11 PM | #15 | ||||||
Whys That?
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IP: 5285 DC82
thanks for the feed. UP^
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