Rules:

Battles Go Up Friday
Check In Due Sunday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time
Verses Due Tuesday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time
Voting Ends Thursday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time

20 Lines Minimum
40 Lines Maximum

No Biting
No Recycling
Do Not Go Over The Line Limit Or Under The Line Limit
Meaning No Less Than 20 Lines No More Than 40 Lines

You Must Vote On 3 Battles Per Week And Edit Them Into Your Check-In.. If You Dont Do So, Youre Banned From The Tourney The Following Week


Topic: 24 Hours To Live

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RV's Only 3 Time Topical Tourney Champion

Check...good luck...

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checkin....same to u limited.

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24hours to live...what would u do? Pop some pills and go mad crazy. Satisfy your blood lust. Find some bitch whos as willing as u to die making love. what about say goodbye to your mother? Hmmm.....heavy topic.
check it, check it.

Reflecting on life, awakening to visions of the aftermath earths doom is ripe
Heavens neglected the strife; ultimate decisions from above, leave mankind to die
I don’t cry, I see the positivity unmistakeably now, amongst the deathly corrosion
Finally free to fly, beneath me opens an abyss; spirits break free to add to the confusion
Underground explosions shaking earth off its axis, nuclear shockwaves reverb on the surface
Thunder resounding heavily, lightning penetrating blowing mass boulders, part of the purpose
Crowds disperse, losing their minds like wicked clowns in a circus, its fuckin crazy
It amazes me how mankind would kill off generations in a lifetime in the evilest way
Chemical warfare, nation against nation, throw in some suicide bombers for scare
Are u unaware how fucked up it is the way we living? all taking no giving…
Poor starved children despair, getting desperate all they got is the air they breathe in
Minimal intake, keep to residual, throw some scraps at em like 1 percent of U.S income
Now we flipping, the earth is giving in to the ripping death tolls n neglected thanks given
Call it compensation, spitting flames of fire from the core this is natural devastation
Let me say im glad, happy to be leaving this place that’s been disgraced, oh the laws of karma
Quick to disarm ya, u fight it with all ya might receive it justly and let it calm ya
The sky darkens my mind fastens on some unfinished business I’ll try before my time passes
Pay respects to my mother say my last goodbyes to my sisters and brother
From one to another it’s a shame my siblings, robbed of the time to discover
Themselves and put a name to the cover, its all ends in a world of disaster
Ahh, admiring the design, im laughing it off the way its affecting me, infecting my mind
Seeing explosions on the horizon, overcoming the darkness with overwhelming shine..
This must be it, the final blow that ends time once and for all im going blind
Uttering my last words………shhhh listen as Earth and space merge.

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waiting for you now LE.

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Links:
http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post1872847

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Soundclick
NEW Myspace

Reflecting on life, awakening to visions of the aftermath earths doom is ripe
Heavens neglected the strife; ultimate decisions from above, leave mankind to die
I don’t cry, I see the positivity unmistakeably now, amongst the deathly corrosion
Finally free to fly, beneath me opens an abyss; spirits break free to add to the confusion
Underground explosions shaking earth off its axis, nuclear shockwaves reverb on the surface
Thunder resounding heavily, lightning penetrating blowing mass boulders, part of the purpose
Crowds disperse, losing their minds like wicked clowns in a circus, its fuckin crazy
It amazes me how mankind would kill off generations in a lifetime in the evilest way
Chemical warfare, nation against nation, throw in some suicide bombers for scare
Are u unaware how fucked up it is the way we living? all taking no giving…
Poor starved children despair, getting desperate all they got is the air they breathe in
Minimal intake, keep to residual, throw some scraps at em like 1 percent of U.S income
Now we flipping, the earth is giving in to the ripping death tolls n neglected thanks given
Call it compensation, spitting flames of fire from the core this is natural devastation
Let me say im glad, happy to be leaving this place that’s been disgraced, oh the laws of karma
Quick to disarm ya, u fight it with all ya might receive it justly and let it calm ya
The sky darkens my mind fastens on some unfinished business I’ll try before my time passes
Pay respects to my mother say my last goodbyes to my sisters and brother
From one to another it’s a shame my siblings, robbed of the time to discover
Themselves and put a name to the cover, its all ends in a world of disaster
Ahh, admiring the design, im laughing it off the way its affecting me, infecting my mind
Seeing explosions on the horizon, overcoming the darkness with overwhelming shine..
This must be it, the final blow that ends time once and for all im going blind
Uttering my last words………shhhh listen as Earth and space merge.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^


Trauma,good verse, nice imaginary, no flow, the struture is what you've totally lacked. You had creativity i can picture this happening in my mind, but i'd sense a little bit expressions in your verse. Vocab is truly 100% good in your verse.




The echo in my head, the doctor's feet...my pulse begins to race...
...The tension in my skin...the devilishly evil grin...on my examiner's face
"Well first I will give you the bad news...damn, I feel sorry for you..."
...I can see the false compassion his eyes...why is it so horribly cruel..?
"You are dying...and it gets worse...you have 24 hours, only a day..."
...I feel like weeping...If only I had one more year and just not today
The doctor takes an enevelope...takes it out, his hand inches close...
..."With this envelope...before you die, you can live your dreams and hopes..."
I look at the envelope...what secret magic happiness could be inside..?
...My heart sinks again...nothing that could make me last longer or survive
"Cheer up..." The doctor's smile appears on the clean-shaven chin...
..."This will allow you to create the wishes and ambitions that could have been."
No...I say to myself, that just would not be morally right...
...I wanna spend my time with Shayla, 'cause there is only tonight
I pick up my jacket...I head for the door, the doctor's voice is ringing...
...What the fuck have I wasted my life for, I wish I could go back to the beginning
In what seems like an instant...I am already home, why so quick...?
...I tell Shayla, but she laughs and smiles...like it was some sort of trick...
"No baby...I am dead serious..." Tears form in my eyes I embrace...
...I can feel the numbness in her body...I feel the tear roll down her face
"No baby...please...you can't leave me here, I will die if you go..."
...I release all of my tears...I squeeze harder, a sob escapes my throat...
We pull away...I cry harder as I see those green, tear filled eyes...
...She leans forwards and kisses me! To my own shocked, horrified surprise
I push away..."Shayla what have you done, now you will die too!"
...She falls to the ground crying..."I can never, ever live without you..."
I pick her up off the ground...I embrace her again, I wont release...
...I start to cry again...she sacrificed her life...she just obtained the disease
We decide to take a drive...we drive down by the river, we take our place...
...I look at Shayla's face...she's smiling...and it is like God's shining good grace
I sit there and lay down...until the sun goes down, but we dont move...
...The most romantic night of my life...here with Shayla under the sad moon
"Baby...do you think we will be together still? When we are in paradise..?"
...I tilt my head..."Death can't even stop us...we will still win the fight..."
A gentle raindrop lands on Shayla's head...another tear roll off her head...
...She buries her face into me..."I have to watch you go...I wish I went instead..."
I begin my weeping again..."It will be okay...trust me it wont be long..."
..."Baby...please...promise that you'll kill me now...before you are gone..."
My mouth is wide...but I reluctantly nod my head...It would ease her pain...
...I lift the rock...I give her a gentle kiss..."I love you...I will see you soon again..."

...Headlines: "Two Found Dead By River...Boyfriend Murders Girlfriend..."...
...It Was The Boyfriends Last 24 Hours...



limit-Very much creative, good verse with some good flow. Nice struture, with no vocab. word was tooo basic. The creativity of it was good. An topic tolled nicly done. The imagination was good, i can picture this happening in my head. overall good verse.


overall= Good drop from both heads but i have to go with Limit. He basically had good flow. He had harder expressions telling. Limit had some good creativity in his verse.Limit upp your vocab words was too basic on your verse. Trauma however didnt had flow. Trauma although you've had everything except flow and expressions. I didnt sense alot of expressions which made your verse really weak and non-readyable. I have to go with limit for good expressions and good flow.

peace

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Both of you approached the topic in a totally different way...

Trauma first: you definately had the vocab, no doubt about that and i liked your wordplay and imagery. I also liked your approach of the topic because it's not what people expect. The flow and structure were kinda off though and that's a shame really...But the way you handled issues we have to this day is real nice, i'll give you 2 of my favo lines because they're so true...

Are u unaware how fucked up it is the way we living? all taking no giving…
Poor starved children despair, getting desperate all they got is the air they breathe in

Solid drop!

Limited Edition

You approached the topic like most of us would...or so i thought because i loved the ending, didn't expect that so definately good one. Vocab goes to Trauma but that was quite obvious i guess. You on the other hand have structure for sure and flow too. You managed to express pure emotions with basic words which makes it easier to read and to follow.

Nice drop!

Okay, this is a very close one...Limited Edition's drop had the flow,structure and lil more emotion cuz it was real personal drop with the girlfriend thing and such. Trauma had vocab and nice creativity, liked how he handled the topic. Both had imagery...But i'm going with Limited Edition on this one 'cause it was slightly more personal so there was more emotion but Trauma, props on the drop man! Both did really well...

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Have to go with limited edition he had a better strucutre. He had more feelings and he flowed better then his op no offense but he made me free and easy to understand the topi so over all I go with limited.

vt limited

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vs super

http://community.rapverse.com/showb...918915&posted=1

great battle props to both

beginning/end-trauma...limited was good but something felt left out, and i dont know what it is theres just something that makes the ending kind of confusing along with the beginning it feels like there wasnt enough descriptiveness on that part

vocab-trauma, basically had a higher vocab and in the end brought out good detail in his verse

emotion-limited edition, this verse felt like it was very personal and it had a lot more emotion put into it since it seemed more like a story...traumas didnt seem real personal just describing whats happening...

description-trauma, the vocabulary used and basically how the words were laid out definately brought out the imagery...it was here more then limiteds in my opinion and the aspect was brought out great...

flow-limited edition, basically all of it was pretty good except near the middle to end it got a little eh...but thats ok, traumas had stretched stuff, even though he got the description aspect it kind of choked his flow and it didnt roll good when i was reading it

limited you did really good and i think this is one of your best from what ive read from...in the end this was a very close battle but i go with trauma, for a better beginning/ending, imagery, and vocabulary...

good luck to both no hate

peace

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this vote is not explained well enough. i hope this can be dq'd.

You all question my flow...shit flows fine i wrote this to a beat and spitting it flows perfect lines are longer but no lack of flow there. need to re-think that shit before u comment again on somebodies flow. heh. can't blame you cats for being restricted by text boundaries.

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^audio and text are different...a good flow on audio isnt necessarily always a good flow on text because theres no beat on text...and im thinkin you did it on a slow beat cuz i dont know how your verse could have good flow on a fast beat...

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Werd...text is so much different...and topical is so much different from text. I think of topicals as a form of poetry...they CAN be converted to songs, but you need to alter them...at least you have yours written to the beat already haha...I'm gonna have to change it to fit the beat for our collab.

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