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12-11-06, 02:10 PM | #1 | ||||||
The Saviour
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LBL Magazine (11th December 2006 - Kempo's Final Edition)
IP:
Intro Yooo. This is my last mag. My last week running the league. My last call! MY FINAL SYMPHONY! THIS IS KEMPOMRK SIGNING OUT! So yeah, I’m not running the league anymore, I’m going over to B-Boys.com to run the WBL with my jolly good friend John Hensley. Shit’s gonna be dope, and I’ve got a few ideas to link the LBL and WBL together, like some sort of partner system in a way. I’ll mention them later. DaTrusHurtz This man is now the moderator of the LBL. I know he’ll do a dope job, so I’m glad he took up the offer. I know you’ll do well dude, so no need for luck or anything gay like that. Special Event Idea Special events will be happening in the WBL when it starts up. And what I’m proposing is something I proposed to David Lama a while back, but never happened. Basically, WBL will be having bi-monthly events, where as LBL will be having monthly events I gather. Therefore, we could do some sort of champ exchange every month. Where in the special event the champ from the WBL faces the champ from the LBL. For example: January – LBL Hosted – LBL Champ vs WBL Champ February – WBL Hosted – WBL Champ vs LBL Champ March – LBL Hosted – LBL Champ vs WBL Champ April – WBL Hosted – WBL Champ vs LBL Champ And so on. I think it’d be dope. End of Year Magazine I’ll be coming back FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY to write an end of year mag. This will primarily have awards. Such as: Best Battler of the Year Whackest Battler of the Year Punchline of the Year Verse of the Year Shock of the Year Etc. Watch out for it, it’ll be doooope. WBL at B-Boys Of course, I have to advertise this. WBL sign up’s currently open, battles being put up this Sunday. http://forums.b-boys.com/showthread.php?t=306 Sign up for this, it’d be dope to see some LBL heads in there. Stay in the LBL though definitely, make the WBL and the LBL your two leagues, as two leagues is probably the max you can be in and still drop nice for both. Roger Glocks Breaks Record! Roger Glocks has broke Butler’s record for longest reigning champion. Glocks has now been champion for 7 weeks, beating Butler’s previous record of 6 weeks. Good job man. The LBL Cypher Wasn’t feeling anything enough to give out a win this week. Just a lot of people who dropped one or two nice bars. So no win for anyone, but peep the cool bars. Roger Glocks dropped this: thought his girl was faithful. thats a funny and wild line it's all about the Benjamin baby...and im pretty sure the child is mine This was nice from Phil Benjamin: fo'real you must be on some crack..or some other shit dude true i aint even in your league...when im a higher rank than you Nick Fletcher came up with this cool bar: i heard ya girl owns you, she put her foot down 'n' made you housebroken 'n' i also heard ya poor.. .. so when i put my foot down ure house'll just be broken I was feeling this from Comedian: i run up on faggots when trashing ya sets i'll take it back a few years... and dash-you-to-death And lastly, Sonny Dimebags dropped this: Run for cover because to be foreal dogg you dont look like brawlin This faggot will Hyde so good, that 70 's show will be callin Battle Reviews LBL Championship Match: 1. Roger Glocks (17-1) vs 2. DaTrusHurtz (17-1) I didn’t like this battle much, it was pretty weak for a champ battle. Really close though, and it was pretty hard to pick a winner I thought. The votes reflected that as well and it came down to 4-3 to Roger Glocks. Which resulted in Glocks breaking Butler’s record for longest consecutive champ, at 7 weeks. Mad props to Glocks! LBL Contendership Match: 3. Te Ora (8-3) vs 4. Erel Avent (12-4) Erel Avent no-showed. Te Ora won. 5. Joe Native (3-3) vs 6. Nick Fletcher (4-0) Not a bad battle, only one quotable from each though in my opinion. The fiddle bar from Fletcher was funny and fresh, I was feeling that. And the no life bar from Joe was tight. So yeah, close battle, but Nick took it fairly easily in the end and won 7-1. 7. TEF (5-3) vs 8. John Hensley (6-1) This was a walkover. Hensley got it easily. He had 3 nice bars, check the top punches for that, some cool stuff. TEF had a horoscope bar that was nice, but apart from that I wasn’t feeling much. Hensley won 8-0. 9. Comedian (6-1) vs 10. Ace Heratoga (4-2) Not feeling this. Comedian didn’t drop good, his best bar was pretty similar to another bar from N.Tav. And Ace’s best bar was recycled. Ace was just better here though, so he took it and won 5-1. 11. Phil Benjamin (3-1) vs 12. Enlightend (2-1) Enlightend no-showed. Phil Benjamin won. 13. Format (1-0) vs 14. Stanza (8-10) Format won this easily. Stanza had nothing at all. Really nothing. Format won 7-0 and his verse was pretty good. 15. Sonny Dimebags (15-8) vs 16. Sir Smash'Alot (2-3) This was terrible. Sir just ain’t good yet, it seems like he wants to improve though so that’s cool. Sonny just dropped awful, way below what he can. Neither really had anything. But Sonny was clearly better and he won 3-1. 17. blacksilence (1-1) vs 18. MoneyMaker (1-3) Awful battle. Neither had anything. Blacksilence was better though and he got this 6-0. 19. uncle phil (0-1) vs 20. Luse Cannon (0-1) Pretty onesided again. Luse seems to not really understand battling. He dropped more lines than phil and his lines were stretched to fuck. Uncle phil won 6-0. 21. Flagrant (0-1) vs 22. Kimura (0-0) Double no-show. Double loss. 23. Wordz Ahgod (0-0) vs 24. Mayhem (0-0) Mayhem no-showed. Wordz Ahgod won. 25. Faime S. Quotez (0-0) vs 26. Tech Skillz (0-0) Rap Disciple took Faime’s place which sadly ruined the no-show fest that we had all hoped for, as Rap actually dropped a verse and took the win. 27. Mushmouf. (0-0) vs 28. i love lamp.? (0-0) vs 29. Lampejo (9-6) Mush and Lamp no-showed. Lampejo won. 30. GuM WoRk (0-0) vs 31. Player-X415 (0-0) Player is the whackest battler this league has ever seen. He’s that bad. His verse was awful. Gum just had to drop a verse to win. I closed this early, and Gum won 8-0. 32. Appocolyptik (0-0) vs 33. K Illa (0-0) Walkover. Appocolyptik won easily. K Illa is awful. Appocolyptik won 7-0. Host Battle - K Illa vs Nick Fletcher First ever host battle in the LBL’s history and it was a walkover. Fletcher killed him and won 4-0. Top Punches your fists are mad weak, but if your punches start smashin then i'll hit you with a counter strike that'll have the game crashin 12. Format vs Stanza hes no threat more like a bye, thats beat this is just a gift from kempo for stealin my win last week 11. uncle phil vs Luse Cannon And if I gave her binoculars, she still can’t get a number The ‘Horoscope so many dudes, …………………..Even Zodiac signs think they can fuck her 10. TEF vs John Hensley So Rell Rap Disciple and Luciano no showed so u hardly shit You can call it luck if you want.. but you'd be better off callin it quits 9. Ace Heratoga vs Comedian Quote:
your a homo gay fuck. lovin male dick, don't deny it's true on a ball? nah, more like a couple of balls are on you 8. Format vs Stanza I asked a dude if he knew u, and if ya shit's the wackest. He said yea i gnome, his skills are a myth and they only reach midget status. 7. John Hensley vs TEF I got this locked & I don't need a cypher win...I'm alrite cause Nick proved that you don't need skill to win...jus NO life 6. Joe Native vs Nick Fletcher I'll have ya body zipped up if ya begin dissin' these. And create a T-Bag that'll bring back memories of what ya bitch did to me. 5. John Hensley vs TEF ure rhymes are nursery.. but i guess its genetics that mould ure form 'coz hey diddle diddle, the cat had a fiddle wit ya moms and you was born 4. Nick Fletcher vs Joe Native His girlfriend is a bitch, we were suppose to chill and instead she stood me up........... pulled my pants down and gave me head 3. Roger Glocks vs DaTrusHurtz It's all you, man up to ur weakness, don't stall dude U got so many word problems, I needed an all-nighter just to solve u 2. DaTrusHurtz vs Roger Glocks If i win i face Fletcher, and i'll make sure that it gets done. Face it, ya ain't an old president, but you're just a warm up for Nixon. 1. John Hensley vs TEF Verse of the Week John Hensley Ya girls like a hotel, so no kid ya didnt choose a winner. Cuz i paid for one night... n' the next fuckin day a new dude was in her. I'll have ya body zipped up if ya begin dissin' these. And create a T-Bag that'll bring back memories of what ya bitch did to me. I asked a dude if he knew u, and if ya shit's the wackest. He said yea i gnome, his skills are a myth and they only reach midget status. Teflon's a perfect name for you, i mean honestly brother. Cuz ya spend ya time huggin one guys chest while takin shots from another. We know u look and act retarded, start believin' that i'm right. I saw tef yellin '' da da daaaa''.. but he's never hearda Mencia in his life. Ya ain't proof God has a sense of humor, but i still laugh at you. Because your proof that God smokes weed, drinks and takes acid too. You're a nice guy, but i'll win and i think that it's clear too. I'd say see ya in hell, but the only place that i'll see ya's my rearview. If i win i face Fletcher, and i'll make sure that it gets done. Face it, ya ain't an old president, but you're just a warm up for Nixon. Battle of the Week Roger Glocks vs DaTrusHurtz Roger Glocks His girlfriend is a bitch, we were suppose to chill and instead she stood me up........... pulled my pants down and gave me head So far, I beat you 2 times n he's shook from glocks if revenge is suite. then you tried getting a room n couldn't book a spot I see the fear in duke, I dont care im spearing him with the 1-2 this battles career sucicide. im glad I drop hotlines everywhere for you This weak body isn't apporaching me, it'll be a joke to see police officer's tried using his rotator cuff and paris hilton broke free dont mind his wackness cuz he drops sloppy and ignorant this kid wrote Bad..... Micheal Jackson is suing for copywrite infringment he thought he was a pimp even tho there all dogs like yeller but seriously all his tricks juss make u laugh.. like Pen and Teller im bringing heat cuz he wants to plan for this week I heard he's ahead of the curb....as my car flies down the street DaTrusHurtz Quote:
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It's all you, man up to ur weakness, don't stall dude U got so many word problems, I needed an all-nighter just to solve u #1 now, but I'll Strip n' seize ur title n' chill Ur in the Pole Position, but u never seem to Tease us with skill Said u had a job interview? That true? I doubt it, slim Translation: Glocks in a suit tellin' a fat bitch to go out with him I hear u got no friends, but u still try to get outta ur home N' lead fights for human rights, cuz humans have always left u alone Wack fuck, u'll get hurt with the punches I'm givin' K, Roger, without a space n' comma's where u'll work for a livin' U thought RV's easy, but saw me standin' like a great tower N' moved to Plan B, but we know that works for less than 48 hours U've beaten D. Stroyer n' a bunch of newbs ur dying to see again Ur champ run's been such a joke, it figures u just faced a Comedian Please no wack fucks who don't get shit voting on this. Good Luck. Predictions LBL Championship Match: 1. Roger Glocks (18-1) vs 2. Te Ora (9-3) They’ve battled before and Glocks won pretty easily. It should be a cool enough battle but Glocks should take it pretty easily. LBL Contendership Match: 3. Nick Fletcher (6-0) vs 4. John Hensley (7-1) Nick’s good but Hensley is dope. Hensley should take this. It’ll be a nice battle but I don’t see Nick winning it. 5. Ace Heratoga (5-2) vs 6. Phil Benjamin (4-1) Ace should take this. Phil’s cool but it seems like he doesn’t put enough effort in, his stuff comes across as effortless. It’s strange. He’s good but has potential to be way better. Ace’ll win it. 7. Format (2-0) vs 8. Sonny Dimebags (16-8) Based on last week Format will win this. Sonny dropped ass and he hasn’t dropped nice for a little while now. Format to win. 9. DaTrusHurtz (17-2) vs 10. Erel Avent (12-5) Tight battle if Erel shows. Erel won’t show though. So DaTrus will pick up the win. I hope Erel shows though as these two had a bit of beef a couple of months back, 11. blacksilence (2-1) vs 12. uncle phil (1-1) black didn’t drop good last week. Uncle dropped aight, he’s better than black so he should win this. Uncle phil to win. 13. Wordz Ahgod (1-0) vs 14. Rap Disciple (1-0) Should be close. Wordz seems better though. Rap’s not bad though, he could take it. But I think Wordz will get it. 15. Lampejo (10-6) vs 16. GuM WoRk (1-0) Gum didn’t drop great last week. He didn’t need to though so I can’t really judge his verse. Lampejo to win though. 17. Appocolyptik (1-0) vs 18. Joe Native (3-4) Appocolyptik dropped aight last week, nothing special but it wasn’t a bad verse. Joe dropped aight, pretty inconsistent though. Appoc should get this. 19. TEF (5-4) vs 20. Comedian (6-2) If TEF sorts out his style he could be tight, as he comes up with some good lines every once in a while. Comedian is better though so he should take this. 21. Stanza (8-11) vs 22. Sir Smash'Alot (2-4) Hard to predict this. Stanza still has really bad wording problems, and his concepts are usually barely feasible. Sir seems like he’s better, so Sir to win. 23. Luse Cannon (0-2) vs 24. Player-X415 (0-1) Player is awful. Luse will win this just by dropping. 25. K Illa (0-1) vs 26. Shiest Lucia (0-0) Shiest is humble, I like that. He seems like he really wants to improve which is cool. And he’s got K Illa this week so if he drops anything resembling a battle verse he will win. 27. Feeble Minded (0-1) vs 28. Serb (0-0) Serb will no-show. It doesn’t matter though cos Feeble will win whatever happens. 29. Wyte (0-0) vs 30. Anthony (0-0) Wyte’s not bad, he drops some cool stuff every once in a while. Dunno why Anthony is. Whyte to win. 31. Ali G (0-0) vs 32. Otto Octavius (0-0) Double no-show. 5 Battles To Watch 1. Nick Fletcher vs John Hensley 2. DaTrusHurtz vs Erel Avent 3. Roger Glocks vs Te Ora 4. Format vs Sonny Dimebags 5. Ace Heratoga vs Phil Benjamin Top 10 Power Rankings 10. Phil Benjamin – Has quite a lotta potential, just needs to keep on elevating. 9. Sonny Dimebags – Has been dropping terribly lately. Dunno how he’ll do against Format this week. 8. Erel Avent – I dunno whether or not he’ll show, but if he does it should make for a tight battle. 7. DaTrusHurtz – Narrowly lost to Glocks, quite a few people thought he won as well. Should be back in the champ match soon if he stays in. 6. Format – Had two easy battles, one was a no-show and the other was against Stanza, but he’s been dropping some cool stuff. 5. Ace Heratoga – Will be in the contendership battle next week, should beat Phil. 4. Te Ora – He won’t beat Glocks in the title battle but he should drop a cool verse and make it a good battle anyway. 3. Nick Fletcher – I don’t see him beating Hensley but he’s still tight and might be able to pull it off. 2. John Hensley – If he votes and shows he’ll be the man to take Glocks title from him. 1. Roger Glocks – Just passed the 7 week mark for holding the title. I don’t see him losing it this week either. Outro So I’m oooout. It’s been cool running this league, lotta dope people been in it since I started it, and I’m glad it’s gonna carry on. PEACE. |
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