yo I lost two battles
so I'ma give you my last battleshit.
please tell me what's wrong with that.

this time I'm gettin' mad/
that shit will be more phat/
than the wack-shit last time so check that/
I had a fucked up day/
got played and stressed by gays/
like you suckin' dicks which just won't spew/
some bitches knocked me down/
and even want to drown/
me and my family you scumsuckin' patsy/
you sucker now get pasted/
it was too much time I wasted/
first I kill your mother/
next jerk will be your brother/
and your the followin'/
you should stop dicksuckin'/
your faggy homo crew/
which's gettin' drunk of brew/
I'll beat the shit out you all/
smack your heads against the Berlin-wall/
you created new up on my head/
how this bitch after our last battle said/
Lyric you're lookin' like a slag/
you stupid fuckin' fag/
I slize you from the dick up to the head/
cause you're dumb and wack/
but now I squash that shit/
anyway you're not able to beat it/
wait at last I have to get a little homophobic/
cause faggits like you got a small or no dick/
Lyricalassassin bitches like you are stressin'/
go home 'n' fuck your dad/
until his anus's red/
but he'll beat your ass too/
no matter what you do/
you liked it so you called him back when your redeye was okay/
you are just a stupid gay.

I really don't know.

was that a battle verse? cause if it was you got a couple a problems. 2 general problems......1) make ya barz longer
2)try usin more wordplay....ok,now if that was a battle verse then you lack punches. in fact, it sounds like its averse for a song or somethin. you need to just attack him. dont tell him how your day is goin or stuff like that, just attack him

^^ Good advice

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ok nuff said unfadable

ive got that problem ive lost 3 won 0 n i dont know how to up my game its weird everytime i think im gettin better i end up losing again peep my battle in the RBBL vs. Dark HisTORY n ive got one in frontlines vs. The Ghost n get back to me thanks much appriciated

Elevate

how though what is there i could elavate on?

you need to work on ya punches and imagry

but this might sound stupid but what is a good punch can you give an example?

doesn't exist you actually have to think about rhyming and put in effort.....a punch is a creative diss, many times with a double meaning....the kind of shit that makes a crowd say ooooh


like you couldnt spit an ill verse if you coughed it.....

you know...that's some basic shit but like that

U couldn't spit Clean if you was usin Listerine

Ok Dat Line is played out like a mufucka but it's actually better than any line u posted in dat verse up there
Try bein more creative with punchlines!!!!
Dont do no simple shit like

I slize you from the dick up to the head/
cause you're dumb and wack/
but now I squash that shit/
anyway you're not able to beat it/

I mean wat da fuck iz dat??!!!!
in those 4 LITTLE lines you used 4 LITTLE WORDZ and didn't even RHYME!!!
head,wack,shit,and beat it

atleast use werdz dat a 1st grader isn't able to use

Try usin multies 2
becuz when you use multies it makes your verse look more attractive and it also improves your FLOW!!


aight man
~`UnO`~

just let it flow bruther the feel wil cum 2 u.
relax and make it easy.
u'll do it 4get about it, yo raps r gud just takes time.

bad advice, i think that cat is mad at life. matter of fact "bitch slapped him twice" just for actin like his ass is tight.

why the fuck you grab the mic?