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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
03-13-05, 01:14 PM
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#1
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C.hristopher S.ean D.abatos
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Forgotten Flow Vs. Os1ris
IP: 37E6 D115
This Is The First Round So Records Will Not Be at stake.
But if you no show you will have your post cut in half. You Must Vote in 2 other battles after you post yours or you will be DQ’d and will have your post cut in half. Check In’s Due Before Tuesday March 15 Verses Due Before Thursday March 17 First to 3 Votes Win’s.. 2-0 = KO Remember, everything is in Pacific Time. If you do not know what that is then too bad. Topic: Victory
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03-13-05, 01:16 PM
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#2
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Loyalty proven
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IP: C7EE 5FCD
easy win. check
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03-13-05, 01:19 PM
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#3
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[ a.k.a Os ]
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IP: F519 0F67
^>
 checkin in
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The Council
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03-13-05, 02:28 PM
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#4
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C.hristopher S.ean D.abatos
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IP: 37E6 D115
30 linex max...30 linex max...
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03-13-05, 04:44 PM
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#5
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Loyalty proven
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IP: C7EE 5FCD
Quote:
1. I aint gonna no show, but if ya post get cut in half, doese that delete them? 2.I think this the first tourny done in Pacific time
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03-13-05, 04:45 PM
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#6
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C.hristopher S.ean D.abatos
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IP: 37E6 D115
Yeah it is the first tourney in pacific.. and your post being deleted is 4 u to find out
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03-16-05, 10:25 PM
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#7
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[ a.k.a Os ]
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IP: F519 0F67
I don't think the topic was all that good..... Sense of victory, touching the earth not envisioning shapes Take circles of hate...history remembering triangular trades Memories put us in the same box that they died in as slaves The stage dissapears, visions fade as we open our eyes See lies and deciet are the foundations on what we survive Alive in a nightmare, awake in dreams of distant lands Where man could prosper and supposed morals could stand Fanned out in incomplete pieces trying to find the right treaties But they're left lost and undiscovered like complete peace is The beast in rising, too few men are labeled as tyrants Seems only those effecting America are those worth fighting Sliding towards an abyss, encountering more and more twists Try to hold on to something but my hands are balled into fists My aimed heights are taller than this, the sky's not my limit I reach out to touch the galaxy and every last particle in it Barter with minutes, swap your time for pleasure and joy? Most things can kill a man, you only live once but it isn't a toy Search deeper, free your mind from the cage its trapped in Your soul is wrapped in a body that wastes your life reacting To trauma around it, let your inner-self be the one surrounded With thoughts of what's left many great thinkers dumbfounded You are you, they are them, this life is mine and not yours I live it and prosper for the victory that I walked towards...
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The Council
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03-17-05, 08:29 PM
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#8
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Loyalty proven
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IP: C7EE 5FCD
Victory can be defined in many different ways. so with a topic so open, why not write on the different ways? so i wrote on different type of vitories and even showed how vitory is not always good (war). though u win is that always good?
i've left definitions of victory at the bottom of each verse. Life... as i enter the world of white, though in death; i recieve a devine feeling of life/ the realization is i spent 16 years of time manegment right, payed off for my strife/ despite my inquiries and speculations, my life turned out to be a bonanza/ the miracle of this triumph started when i unburdoned myself of the blue bandana/ the resting sould of my girl inspired me as i remeber her last kiss/ so the victory for me is being able to join her in the land of eternal bliss/ (Victory-living life to its greatest quality) Basketball... Fourth quarter, down by five in the championship, twenty seconds on the clock/ our ball, double teamed on the toss in since im expected to take the shot/ we already know what to do in this predicament, our roster holds no begginers/ off ball move baseline, defender falls into a screen set bye my center/ hit the open shot for the three, 8 seconds left for my team/ balls thrown in bye their power foward and intercepted by me/ wide open for the three, perfect juncture to win the game for us/ pump fake and pass to the center under the rim, now there's a victory for ya/ (Victory-Accepting team Victory over your own) War... as only about twenty enemies remain, my mind crystalizes and regains focus/ how could i have slain all of these people with such stable emotion/ thinkin back on how all the detenators i've layed must've exploded/ and how a thin line is painted between murder and killing without a motive/ by the time my day dream was over, i realized everyone was dead/ and in sorrow i let the last bullet fly from the chamber straight to my head/ (Victory-the realization that you are the bad guy) Rapverse...(closer) so to acheive victory in this battle i make extensive sacrafices in time/ Victory's bein able to applaud an opponent in battle, so i salute Os1ris' rhyme (Victory-showing support to your opponent in the midst of battle)
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03-17-05, 08:30 PM
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#9
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Loyalty proven
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IP: C7EE 5FCD
and i agree that i didnt like the topic
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03-17-05, 09:44 PM
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#10
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[ a.k.a Os ]
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IP: F519 0F67
shouldn't this be closed??????
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03-17-05, 09:48 PM
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#11
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Loyalty proven
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IP: C7EE 5FCD
closed for what?
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03-17-05, 10:08 PM
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#12
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C.hristopher S.ean D.abatos
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IP: 12E0 76C8
os: wow dude.. very surprised by your verse... i seriously thought ur verse wasn't going to be so great.. but I could feel that you put work into this.. your vocab was on point in this.. your structure was good but structure doesn't matter.. it only depends on the flow.. I also liked the way you explained your topic.. it was way different from what i woulda put.. well actually not but i mean from what alot of other peeps would put.. and i see very great potential in you man.. hopefully you stay here long enough for me to see you use it...good job.. but yo my favorite line was
My aimed heights are taller than this, the sky's not my limit I reach out to touch the galaxy and every last particle in it that is very creative man.. that got you this battle.. well maybe it did.. imma still have to read flow's verse right now.. 7/10 Forgotten Flow: yo.. u seriously dissapointed me man.. from that ego of yours (no offense lol)... i thought u were going to come hard on th is.. but you didn't.. your structure was way off and i know i sed struct. don't matter.. but if your stucture is as off as that.. then your flow also is off as hell.. The only good thing was how you didn't just write about one victory but many of them.. you should also work on your vocab and creativite man.. well good job i guess.. 5/10 Vote: Os1ris
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03-18-05, 06:37 AM
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#13
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Loyalty proven
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IP: C7EE 5FCD
i tol u i cant do 1 word topics
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03-18-05, 03:33 PM
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#14
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Tight.
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IP: 1768 36E3
FLow all I can is. WHAT THE FOOK?! You are doper than me, yet I feel you didn't hit this topic nearly as close as you could've. I almost cried when I read it after Osirus's. I was all like, damn. And some advice might be to lose the "/" at the end of each of your lines, if you have to put it, put it at the end of a bar, or a certain rhyme segment. Some of the creativity wasn't really there.....
Vote/ Osirus, for the more emotional and better imagery descriptive language verse. Good job though, just dissapointed flow that's all. |
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03-18-05, 09:30 PM
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#15
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Loyalty proven
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IP: C7EE 5FCD
i know man, i know. just one of the many upsets thanks to mistas one word topics. Os1ris by ko (lol doin Datbotos job)
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