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Old 10-26-06, 11:58 PM   #1
Valerie
Can u guess 2v's Gender?
 
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When I seek truth.

IP: 2D62 68E3

The sweet Smell of the finest and worst and something so beautiful it hurts.
Why me? why cheat? I thought you loved me is this what I really deserve?
Your smile and laugh still have no touch compared to given ass.
My heart opened for you then you take advantage’
Broke me in a thousand pieces a shattered image and broken glass.
Tears hit floors like rain on concrete, opening up another part of me.
My heart was your answer to your every future dream.
When I look in a mirror you’re my reflection’
But then again you connected to guys like a monthly tradition.
Cold hearted no feelings and you’re a human being?
I saw more of your backside then I did at your heart.
Emotionless you ripped me and I fell apart.
 
Old 10-27-06, 07:13 PM   #2
Valiant
Human Crack in The Flesh.
 
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Tears hit floors like rain on concrete, opening up another part of me.
My heart was your answer to your every future dream.

^^ nice line

Good job at it, at first i that this would be a poetic piece (hench the name)
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Old 10-28-06, 09:51 AM   #3
Journal!st
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ncie job man i like how it was short and sweet yet...you did have some wording problems but you did nice hear man no need to really change shit...i mean you did good here why change it?!...i like your emotino and your multies here aswell nice job man keep elevating!
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Old 10-31-06, 10:25 PM   #4
Valerie
Can u guess 2v's Gender?
 
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word thanks for the feed.
 
Old 10-31-06, 10:54 PM   #5
Young Fear
illmatic
 
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The bitch played you too? Know the feeling nice piece duke. I liked the multis like ^^ said but I liked the emotion best. Those are words spoken/written off of true experience. nice piece duke.



Check me out and give feedback
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=236533
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Old 11-02-06, 06:53 PM   #6
MoneyMaker
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Deep stuff my nigga keep it up
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Old 11-02-06, 08:14 PM   #7
Valerie
Can u guess 2v's Gender?
 
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word thanks.
 
Old 11-02-06, 09:25 PM   #8
CyKo
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ghood shit my ni66a...that was some deep shit....u can tell it can straight from the heart...keep it up
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Old 11-03-06, 12:17 AM   #9
Valerie
Can u guess 2v's Gender?
 
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word. uppin for feed on this.
 
Old 11-12-06, 01:34 PM   #10
Valiant
Human Crack in The Flesh.
 
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Not bad i liked it................
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