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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
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| View Poll Results: Who Won This Topical Battle ? | |||
| Flow Intelligent |
  
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2 | 50.00% |
| Untraceable |
  
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2 | 50.00% |
| Voters: 4. You may not vote on this poll | |||
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12-24-04, 10:58 AM
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#1
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The Epitome Of Greatness
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Flow Intelligent Vs. Untraceable
IP: 0825 899A
Rules:
Battles Go Up Friday Check In Due Sunday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time Verses Due Tuesday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time Voting Ends Thursday By 11:59 PM Eastern Time 20 Lines Minimum 40 Lines Maximum No Biting No Recycling Do Not Go Over The Line Limit Or Under The Line Limit Meaning No Less Than 20 Lines No More Than 40 Lines You Must Vote On 3 Battles Per Week And Edit Them Into Your Check-In.. If You Dont Do So, Youre Banned From The Tourney The Following Week Topic: Youre Commiting Suicide.. Why And How Will You Do It.
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RV's Only 3 Time Topical Tourney Champion  |
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12-27-04, 12:54 AM
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#2
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..Rv Sucks..
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IP: 408D D2A2
dude my bad i was in PA for xmas weekend and couldnt get int access until i got back and i just got back.....im supposed to be sleepin but i wanted to find out what was goin on with RV while i was gone.........so is it ok i check in a lil late..........like now...........checkin in
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12-27-04, 02:42 AM
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#3
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The Epitome Of Greatness
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IP: 3240 794D
its aiight you still got another day to check in so youre good checkin in
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RV's Only 3 Time Topical Tourney Champion |
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12-28-04, 07:40 PM
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#4
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..Rv Sucks..
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IP: 408D D2A2
topic: how and why to commit suicide
why: girls on the hospital bed surrounded and crwoded by the doctors bothered that i cant bring my shrouded mind i can only proctor fathered the child the hands are awaitin to recieve but i need to release pee unknowing in the absence of my leave my wife had managed no screaming wondering how she didnt, no one paid attention to the line thats gone flat matter of fact my boy has the imbilical cord, round his neck its wrapped drastically imapactin my emotion but within minutes i heard music moving round i realize its my phone i awnswer it and feel like pukin knew it was my mother but somthing sounded udderly different listen to crying and soft voices my mind is swirling but im missin the key vision of that her driving in bad weather was a bad decision lifting my spirits to the sky as i pray for her life and for her not to die wonder why all these tragedies managed to kill my remainig families lives strive to keep myself alive as i cry and as i sulk an walk out the front door reminsice how i lost my wife, son, and mother and i dunno what to live for how: have no reasons to go on living so my minds decision is to take a few pills usually used for thrills but now theyr used to kill the man who had it all until it was taken but im going to a sleep inwhcih i wont awaken cuz this life im hatin debatin on how many to take which ones can kill me faster so i can rest with relations created a stae of mind which i can no longer handle so next to the bottle i will lie rely on it to do its job but i awaken in the hospital wondering why im still alive tried to commit suicide so i know now its jail time pending above my dazed head deadly combinations of pills couldnt kill the will of something keein me from dead treatin me instead and now im confused and i see my moms car on the news abusing my memories of how i herd her last breath so its suicide i will choose losin my mind from the deaths that rest in my head so i try to find a knife i rush on to any operating room not caring of the doctors trying to save a life i grab the scalpel and hold it to my neck and i look and all eyes rest on my hand standing there my life flashes before me and surely i ingnored for i am only a man can only handle so much and so much for living so with that scalpel i make an incision vision of the doctors fade before me for this lesion on my neck was cuz with percision ......DONT GET IT.....DONT VOTE.......
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12-28-04, 09:50 PM
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#5
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The Epitome Of Greatness
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IP: 0825 899A
Aiight check it..... My life has been a mountain of mounting depression I paid the cost, love is lost, and im doubting rejection So let me bring you into the deadly story of Chris Mcnair It's nothing, im not bluffing, the love just dissapeared I've been constantly causing malovelonce to myself A knife, is my life, and the blood seems to help The pain has drained every bit of emotion from my bones And i carve at my brain until all of my feelings are alone But once they're alone, i feel bored and lonely I have no memories to hold me and keep me homely Twidiling thumbs, snatching my hair, its all right Because if i get lucky i might stay alive all night Well let me tell you why im feeling so broke and hurt My girlfriend had my heart and it belonged to only her But she decided it would be better if we were just friends But then again, i guess thats the best way for it to end No matter the distance, in a instance, i would be there The reason was inevitable, alone she was also scared So we had something in common, but it meant nothing She told me she loved me, but she was only fronting Late at night i would think to myself, what is death about I wish i would die but i wont let the words escape my mouth It seems like every illiterate person reads my songs and worries Cuz death is my favortie topic, basically because it cant hurt me But a knife can, and my right hand, is aiming for a wrist But why would i even dare to end my painful life like this Sure i cry alot and my brain will always be scarred But life is a gift and it definately not that hard Multiple factions come in to play, i bleed with luxury But my mind has his own ideas and moves with trudgery So fuck what everyone says i dont deserve a life I got an appointment with death, reserve the knife I take it to my wrist, and cut slowly but deeply I might as well keep going, no one here needs me The blood starts to drip in the soda in my cup And i realize i was going left to right and not up It wont work successfully, unless i do it right If not, i'll sit and deficate on myself all night I cut the wrong vein, and blood spewed in the air I ended it, and i was glad that no one knew i was here
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RV's Only 3 Time Topical Tourney Champion |
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12-28-04, 10:38 PM
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#6
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Knock out kings fur life
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IP: F979 0B30
I like flows poem style on this topical and I liked you'res also it was quiet good. But I think flow had a better rhyming scheme and his opener and imagery, and vocab just had it all and it flowed better with me.
So my vote goes to flow peace. |
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12-29-04, 12:36 AM
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#7
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..Rv Sucks..
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IP: 408D D2A2
uppin
yeh he had a good piece but flow how would you rate me verse....its my first time and also first in he league so i know ur good.......can you tell me if you think it was a decent drop? 
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12-29-04, 01:29 AM
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#8
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..Rv Sucks..
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IP: 408D D2A2
yo there isnt any other battles to vote on..........and most ppl no showed...........so uhh.......am i able to sign up for the second week?......since you lost pretty much all the ppl?
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12-29-04, 09:59 AM
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#9
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Knock out kings fur life
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IP: 07D4 5143
yea thats what I started to think this is so stressful with half of the league a no show.
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12-29-04, 11:00 AM
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#10
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The Epitome Of Greatness
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IP: 28AD 5545
just vote on battles that have verses
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RV's Only 3 Time Topical Tourney Champion |
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12-29-04, 01:13 PM
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#11
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..Rv Sucks..
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IP: 408D D2A2
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=168006
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=168002 http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=168000
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12-29-04, 01:52 PM
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#12
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IP: D5FE 7245
goin with flow on this one but untraceable u came great as well lemme break it down:
opener/closer-i thought flow got both of these...untraceables opener didnt feel like an opener...it felt like he was jumping right into it and something felt left out but good none the less... imagery-untraceable, this was close but untraceable got this aspect in my opinion because of the words he used and the length of everything brought more chances of getting good imagery, the words he used were good and explained it well so i could see what was happening... vocab-untraceable, just had a bigger vocab here...but unfortunately it was too much and fucked the flow up at times flow-flow, flow managed to use some big words and keep his flow intact...untraceable used too many big words in my opinion and it messed up the flow so it had stretched here and threw me off...sometimes the multies held me in place but sometimes it didnt... emotion-this was really close as well but im gonna go with flow...it just felt like he had more emotion into it because of the story told...like i said before untraceables verse kind of just got into it too quick and the words he used upped his imagery more then emotion and i just felt like there was more emotion into the character in flows verse no hate to both, both did great but in the end flow won in my opinion peace
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The Council
Most Recent Funniest Line "I dont go to malls cuz i dont like shoppin I cant buy clothes when the manikins are watchin" -Canibus |
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12-29-04, 03:11 PM
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#13
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Odi et Amo
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IP: BE51 9836
Okay, lemme check this one out...
I'll start off with looking at vocab in both drops...it's pretty clear that Untraceable took this easily. Flow's vocab wasn't basic at all but it was definately more complex and better in Untraceable's drop. Which brings me to the next thing: imagery and emotion because these two things usually go hand in hand with your vocab. Untraceable also had the imagery, his bigger vocab helped him to put more complexness into his drop, a more vivid description of the circumstances and of what happened. But Flow took emotion because big words don't always fit...you can say something real deep with nice emotion with basic words and that's exactly what Flow did. He managed to describe the feelings and thoughts with simple words but really powerful. Flow and structure where kind of similar but Flow's drop was easier to read, maybe because of the vocab and length of sentences. Now this was the general breakdown...what i find the most important in a verse for topical battle is the imagery and emotion...and you both took one of those so this is a hard one...Flow's was easier to read but Untraceable's drop made me think about stuff a lil more so my vote goes to Untraceable but this was real close...
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Authentik Intelligence  ...The future is mine... |
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12-30-04, 01:15 AM
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#14
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I walk & walk over you
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IP: 057B 81F6
Aight let me break this down
vocab-alright both had good drops.Nice struture and flow.The first thing i look in topicals is vocab. Flow got vocab hands down. no words werent basic. imaginary-Both came good with the imaginary.Untracable you had good imaginary very well explain the topic in your verse. Flow good job i liked yours, it was kinda an story line but good drop. i gots to give Untracable, he explained his the topic very well. creative- Both came good, I could easily paint a picture in my mind, while reading your verses.The one who had better creativity is flow.Untracable you had good creativity but Flow just came real harder on this catergory. expression-Untracable i felt like you was not putting feelings in your verse as much, you had feelings but you need to express them more, Extend it.It was like you werent putting your heart into it.Flow you had good emotions from your verse, i felt your feelings and pain. Good drop Flow-untracable and flow took that catergory. overall=good battle, nice drop's from both heads, but i felted flow came a lil harder, with vocab, creativity,imaginary ect. Untracable nice drop work on expressing a lil more. peace v/flow
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.:* Crhyme Sindicate* :.
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12-30-04, 06:24 PM
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#15
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Life is a Constant Battle
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voting on the shit
IP: 9783 3A09
vocab-i think that untraceable took it with the technical words, flows wasn't a regular old piece tho...i felt he had words n complexity also
imaginary- i think that untraceable took it in the imagery because his word choice set it up very well.Flow had a good first person look on the ideal Creative-Creativity was on Flows side i think he had alot of creativity with his words more than untraceable had complexity with words as i saw it... Expression- Flow wins this one because he came very emotional from the first person view as i said in the begining. He added a certain intensity to his words which is why i think he took the other side off the battle. Flow- i think that untraceable had it very well set up with the words which set up his lines and imaginary so thats the only reason i put the vote for untraceable it was a tought vote but gotta go with untraceable.
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