ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
ay yo 50
whut i tell you
we aint even have to say shit
they did it
ha ha

monkey see monkey do
they'll never make the first move
just let em come to you
cause they gon always say and do
what the other one do
so let em come to you
the rest 'll just follow suit
monkey see monkey do
tweedle dee tweedle dum
if they really want it bad enough well then it gon' come
now here they come like we expected
now we just set em up
check mate motherfucker
game's over we won
tweedle dee tweedle dum

doesnt take much
for me to race up and stank up
when motherfuckers hate your guts
you dont even gotta say much
for me to put a pen to a blank sheet of paper
like smearin bloodstains with a paint brush
i cant explain what it is my brain does
but however it works its insane just plain nuts
and it aint just my brain thats dangerous
its a whole combination of things
it takes nuts
and im not afraid to raise the stakes up
i got a million bucks in the bank and eight trucks
for anybody who gets on a track and spanks us
im paitently waitin for the day
im anxious
to see the look on your fake mugs when you thugs go bankrupt
you're drunk you aint tough
whatever you drank musta just turned you into some gangstas
this is me talkin motherfucker this aint drugs
you wanna pop shit
wake up
then make up
fuck that
its too late yall now face up
i pray for the day that someone who spits with the calibur that nas and jay does
opens up his jaws to say somethin to rattle my name off
or rattle the first thing from the top of his brain off
so i can blow the fuckin dust off of this chainsaw
and give him the surgery that he came for
till i peel the pain off
i never been shot but i think me and 50 musta been cut from the same cloth
cause i've always came off like Ja's chain
when they tried to rush him and lost
and came back and gave him a watch in exchange for it
i dont stop
only thing that i wait for is the day that i dont gotta report to probate court
cause ima give you all the reason to hate more
cause i've been holdin my tounge till i got a sprained jaw
alot of rappers on my list
it just aint ja
and ima read the motherfucker off come april
you pussies think i went soft cause 8 mile
when i come back
ill be shootin more than just paint balls
trust me

monkey see monkey do
they'll never make the first move
just let em come to you
cause they gon always say and do
what the other one do
so let em come to you
the rest 'll just follow suit
monkey see monkey do
tweedle dee tweedle dum
if they really want it bad enough well then it gon' come
now here they come like we expected
now we just set em up
check mate motherfucker
game's over we won
tweedle dee tweedle dum

fuckin dummies
this aint chess
you playin motherfuckin checkers
this shit is all day man its too easy
we playin chess you playin checkers
you bout to get your motherfuckin asses jumped
fuckin punks
and by the way
we aint just talkin to one person
we talkin to every-motherfuckin-body who wants to bring it
cause we bringin it to anybody who wants to bring it
so bring it
dont pick up the ball if you dont wanna play man
it's all fucked up now
what the fuck am i s'posed to do now?
huh?
what the fuck am i s'posed to do?
haha
yo we out

[Intro]
{in a high falsetto voice}
Uncle Marshall!
Will you Tell us a bedtime story?
{regular voice}
Here we go...

[Verse One]
Now once upon a time not long ago
There was a little rapper about to blow
But his album came and it was not good
I think it went lead or double copper wood
So the silly little fans they were mislead
By a nerdy internet computer hip-hop head
"Me and you, 'Clef, we're gonna make some cash
Grab the silver paint and let's paint my ass"
Hey mister, would ya care to bare witness to
The ass-whippin' I'm about to administer
To this little ass-kissin' vaginal blister
'Stanabis', little marshall mathers sister
And in this corner, we have the mister
not havin' it, it's the mad sinister
Dr. Evil with his bag of tricks for
this little antagonist faggot dick-suckin'
ex-LL Cool J fan from Windsor
I'm 'bout to murder little Kenny fag Kennif-sta
You bastard I ain't wanna have to diss ya
Canabis, where the fuck you at? I miss ya!

[Chorus]
Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch
where for art thou can-I-bitch?
Please tell me what happened with
that style that you were rappin' with
Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch
are you from Los Angeles
New York or just a janitor
from Canada? Oh Can-i-bitch

Now at first I ain't really understand the shit
Picture me for a second and imagine it
Chillin' in a Bat-Mansion and relaxin'
When all a sudden some bullshit comes across the scanner
It's Can-i-bitch with some Stan Lives shit
They greet me out at first man this is sick
For me being just a sick disconflict
gets my dick harder than arithmetic
And I know how you jealous ones envy
I shoulda knew better from the first few letters you sent me
The first two letters you were tellin' me shit
like you respect me, like any other regular MC
The third letter you ask how come I ain't return
none of the messages at Shady Records You Left Me
The fourth Letter: "Slim you really startin' to upset me!"
The fifth letter told me you were comin' to get me
The sixth threat there's a bomb threat in our building
This crazy motherfucker's really tryin' to kill me!
So I went back and read the first few letters that said
Some shit about a message you left
Oh shit, that's not an "E" that's an "A"
This dude wants to leave me a "massage," he's gay!!
Right away I'm on the phone with Dr. Dre
We got a bogey! (Marshall I'm on the way)

[Chorus]
Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch
where for art thou can-a-bitch?
Please tell me what happened with
that style that you were rappin' with
Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch
are you from Los Angeles
New York or just a janitor
from Canada? Oh Can-i-bitch

So in two seconds flat Dre's at my crib
The funny thing is we both know where this kid lives
And neither one of us have Canadian citizenship
Shit oh Dre wait a mintue that's it
All we gotta do is use a bit of turbo boost
We can fly over the border "Let's go" {*WOOSH!*}
So we're off to Toronto and we're gainin' speed
{*BOOSH!*} (What was that?) oh Jermaine Dupre
Fuck It, keep goin' no time to waste
Wait backup hit him one more time in case
okay .. fuck now he's draggin' under the car
Oh well only 30 more thousand miles
Meanwhile me and Dre are tryin' to conversate
Just tryin' to find a reason for the constant hate
And tryin' to figure out what happened to 'Germaine Propaine'
"He couldn't have fell off that hard!" ain't no way
"What happened to the way you was rappin' when you was scandalous
the Canibus turned into a television evangelist"
Plus he raps with his regular voice {*BOOSH!*} {*BOOSH!*}
{*BOOSH!*} {*BOOSH!*} (what was that?) Pet Shop Boys
So we pull up to the bridge where he last was spotted
His corpse was still movin' but his ass was rotted
He kind of smelled a little like Courtney Love
I figure if I stick him with a fork he's done
So I stapped him twice, kept jabbin', Christ
He won't die this guy's like a battered wife
He's like Kim, he keeps comin' back for more
But he won't fight back I cracked his jaw
Hold up 'bis quit foldin' up!
Punch me in the chest make my shoulders touch!
DO SOMETHIN'! at least one punchline
C'mon till the meter reads 9-9-9-9!
Say 90 percent of my fans are blonde
'bis c'mon answer me man respond!!!
Tell me 'bout the sun rain moon and stars
Intergalatical metaphors from Mars!
Raw to the floor, raw like Resovoir Dogs
Bite ANOTHER line from Redman's song!
Suddenly the stub from a dead man's arm
from a midget reaches out from under the car
It's JD, this motherfucker won't die neither
Dre starts sprayin' him with cans of Ether
We stomped the bitch and then stopmed the bitch again
(Compton!) Detroit bitch talk some shit again!!
STOMP HIM! (switch feet) STOMP HIM! (switch again!)
Dre alright he's dead dog, quit kickin him!
I think Stanabis jumped off the bridge again
(Damn...) he disappeared, yo he's gone, he did it again!

[Chorus]
Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch
where for art thou can-a-bitch?
Please tell me what happened with
that style that you were rappin' with
Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch
are you from Los Angeles
New York or just a janitor
from Canada? Oh Can-i-bitch