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Old 09-11-05, 01:24 PM   #16
Dervla
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Well I don't see many people saying "Emotion is boring as fuck" You need Emotion to bring out the best in the piece also if you follow it up with imaginary...In my opinion Emotions bring out the best in the piece...and a decent follow up too.
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ITawAPuddyKat: Yeah, I guess. But I won't be a Lesbo for life.
Smartone Freal: oh so u DO have plans of turnin str8
ITawAPuddyKat: Well Yes, Yes I do.
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: Lol, all smiles aren't we? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol yea i cant hide what i think bout u
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: ...Oh, what DO you think about me? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol sorry thats private
ITawAPuddyKat: EWWWWWWW..*Sigged*
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Old 09-11-05, 01:27 PM   #17
Crazy Hades
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That's your opinion. I don't see them voting against you because you don't have originality or vocabulary. Emotion doesn't matter AT ALL in a topical piece. It depends on the topic and how you shape it, and I shaped it in a way that wasn't emotional, so why base it on something you did and I didn't?
 
Old 09-11-05, 01:33 PM   #18
Dervla
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Your opinion say I don't have originality that's fine..But who's they? Only one person voted in this battle and that's DQ. Your right I don't have Vocab but you dont always need vocab. In my opinon I think my piece was original..You may don't but I do...Now The thing you didn't do was to follow it up..You went RIGHT into the main Topic when you could've expanded and go toward the ending...It was fast and it was boring (In my opinon) Which I did..I expanded and put down a story Like I always do and follow it up to the ending. "Expansion" is the key word here, if you expanded your piece you could've won this...But you went str8 ahead into the main topic making it not intersting and shit..In my opinion. You can create a small piece and it still can be very good and complex..with metaphors and similies decent wordplay..
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mystery Is a Freak!!

ITawAPuddyKat: Yeah, I guess. But I won't be a Lesbo for life.
Smartone Freal: oh so u DO have plans of turnin str8
ITawAPuddyKat: Well Yes, Yes I do.
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: Lol, all smiles aren't we? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol yea i cant hide what i think bout u
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: ...Oh, what DO you think about me? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol sorry thats private
ITawAPuddyKat: EWWWWWWW..*Sigged*
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Old 09-11-05, 01:37 PM   #19
Crazy Hades
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I didn't 'expand it' when the whole thing basically led to what it meant? Whatever. I still you.
 
Old 09-11-05, 01:38 PM   #20
Dervla
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Awwwww I you yoo.........
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mystery Is a Freak!!

ITawAPuddyKat: Yeah, I guess. But I won't be a Lesbo for life.
Smartone Freal: oh so u DO have plans of turnin str8
ITawAPuddyKat: Well Yes, Yes I do.
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: Lol, all smiles aren't we? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol yea i cant hide what i think bout u
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: ...Oh, what DO you think about me? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol sorry thats private
ITawAPuddyKat: EWWWWWWW..*Sigged*
Send a message via AIM to Dervla  
Old 09-11-05, 01:39 PM   #21
Crazy Hades
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I bet I got you confused as hell in the beginning, huh? Some people don't realize the whole thing is based on the fact I'm trying to make it seem like it's something about possession or something in the beginning. Twists are underrated.
 
Old 09-11-05, 01:42 PM   #22
Dervla
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True that...I was a little confuse I had to read it 3 times...to get the full concept...

Shit...Lol..
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mystery Is a Freak!!

ITawAPuddyKat: Yeah, I guess. But I won't be a Lesbo for life.
Smartone Freal: oh so u DO have plans of turnin str8
ITawAPuddyKat: Well Yes, Yes I do.
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: Lol, all smiles aren't we? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol yea i cant hide what i think bout u
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: ...Oh, what DO you think about me? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol sorry thats private
ITawAPuddyKat: EWWWWWWW..*Sigged*
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Old 09-11-05, 08:39 PM   #23
Kawn Flixx
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This was a pretty good battle but ima have to give this one to Daemon..to me he had alittle more imagery.. nice vocab and wordpaly.. so did lola dont get me wrong but i just was feeling daemons alittle more.. tweetys sorta lost my attention cus she made her font smaller so her structure would go together... but overall it was a pretty nice topical battle but to me like i said daemon won

Vote-Daemon
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Old 09-11-05, 08:42 PM   #24
Dervla
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vote against me...because of a font...hmm w.e 1-1...
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mystery Is a Freak!!

ITawAPuddyKat: Yeah, I guess. But I won't be a Lesbo for life.
Smartone Freal: oh so u DO have plans of turnin str8
ITawAPuddyKat: Well Yes, Yes I do.
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: Lol, all smiles aren't we? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol yea i cant hide what i think bout u
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: ...Oh, what DO you think about me? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol sorry thats private
ITawAPuddyKat: EWWWWWWW..*Sigged*
Send a message via AIM to Dervla  
Old 09-11-05, 08:54 PM   #25
Crazy Hades
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I didn't whine about votes, you shouldn't either./
 
Old 09-12-05, 02:36 PM   #26
Spektikul
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Daemon:

Nice use of vocab and imagry. Your diction was very descriptive which I liked. However, I think you should have made your verse longer, ya know? You didnt actually get into much detail about the overall topic. I feel that you could have gone many different ways with the title Awakening Creatures. The path the you chose to base your verse on was a little weak and I think thats what hurt you the most.

Tweety:

Right off that bat I noticed great diction, structure, rhyming and excellent imagry. I knew you were always dopeness at topical and was expecting something this good. Honestly, one of the best topicals Ive seen out of you, permitting that it was not a topic that you picked to write about. You wrote differently than Daemon, took a different path with the given topic and it was a good pick. I thoroughly enjoyed reading your verse, good job.

V/Tweety..........................
 
Old 09-12-05, 03:49 PM   #27
Sean Gunner
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Closed
Tweety wins due to a 2-1 vote.
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