Intro

Wassup bitches! First off, I want to thank Kempo for doing a hell of a job with this league over the course of this year. Over the years, RV has always struggled to form an established text league, and Kempo was finally able to accomplish this. I can assure you that I will only be building on what Kempo has left me and will continue to make this league greater. This week wasn’t too bad of a start. A few no-shows, but not too many, voting was good, and most of the anticipated battles went down. Quality of the punches could be better, but on the plus side, John Hensley actually voted this week! Lol. With that said, I’m going to highlight what went down, and then give you all a preview of next week, including some of the changes that are going down in this league.

The LBL Cypher

The cypher this week had some activity, but unfortunately a lot of it was from some really wack heads. I read through the whole thing, these lines weren’t too bad:

I'll do what I have to do, He wanna take Kempo'S MuRK? I knew it
Black's margin of error should be wide
............but his stretched lines will probablly burst right though it – Tef
Even Stanza could drop better, Comedian....you loosing your witt
And this cypher MUST be haunted...coz all I hear is "boooo" when you spit – Wordz Ahgod
i could take this old school, flippin' nameplays 'n' such
'coz my initial thoughts are its the W,A thing you'll never touch – Nick Fletcher

But there was a very clear winner and that was Comedian. He dropped some pretty decent shit throughout the cypher and easily took this.


Tha Don of Mics loves TEF - there's no denying it dude
cause not only does he stand by him; but lies with him, too
i'm committing murder tonight, better write your will dude
cause i'll even turn your rhyme scheme into a plot to kill you
get outta here... no one would ever quote fags son
i'm tossing out Black Star... fuck a Talib & Mos album
in a matter of no time i drop knowledge when i flow lines
here's some fucking facts... BLACK DON'T SHINE
This wigga is shit... fuck a fletcher... this kid is a bitch
i'll aim w/ arrows at ya mouth to go w/ them quivering lips
this whore wins? Plz kid, it'd be better off if you forfeit
no one gives Nick props <-- but its required to support him
Your trash don't hit, get your spine stomped in seconds
Being wireless is no excuse for your lines not connecting

Grats Comedian. Let me know if you want a win added to your record or a loss removed.

Last Week’s Battle Reviews

LBL Championship Match: 1. Roger Glocks (18-1) vs 2. Te Ora (9-3)

This battle wasn’t bad. Not as good as a champ match should be, but a pretty good read. Glock’s first 6 lines were all quotable and it looked like it was gonna be a pretty dope verse. He really slowed down the rest of the way, but had enough to take this. Te Ora came okay, his verse would have beat most people in the league, his B-Boys line was nice, but really just didn’t have quite enough here. Most voters agreed it was close, but Glocks ended up taking all the votes.

LBL Contendership Match: 3. Nick Fletcher (6-0) vs 4. John Hensley (7-1)

Pretty dope battle here as it was expected to be. Both battlers dropped quickly after battles were setup with 20 line verses. Most of it was quotable, but Hens was more consistent and landed more top punches in this mag than anyone else. Nick garnered a few votes, but Hens ended up taking this in the end 4-2.

5. Ace Heratoga (5-2) vs 6. Phil Benjamin (4-1)

This battle was okay, but it could have been so much better. Phil Benjamin dropped about what I expected him to, a few dope lines and a few played lines. Ace definitely looked like he took it easy, and thought he had enough to win, but he didn’t. This was a pretty close match, but Phil ended up taking all the votes.

7. Format (2-0) vs 8. Sonny Dimebags (16-8)

This battle was weak in more ways than 1. Format dropped near the deadline an 8 line verse that was pretty weak, definitely not up to the calibre of what he dropped last week. Sonny didn’t have much time to write and keyed a quick verse as well that was 14 minutes past the deadline. Everyone voted for Sonny, but Format took the DQ win.

9. DaTrusHurtz (18-2) vs 10. Erel Avent (12-5)

Having beaten this clown already a couple times before, I knew it was extremely likely he wouldn’t show. However, I still decided to write a 100% personal based verse that the few readers who commented said was pretty dope. Erel of course no-showed and will never be allowed back in this league again.

11. Blacksilence (2-1) vs 12. Uncil Phil (1-1)

Uncil Phil came first and dropped far weaker than he’s capable of. He still looked a bit bummed out from getting a loss from not voting. Blacksilence didn’t drop that great either, but clearly took advantage of the situation and dropped a few quotable lines. He ended up getting the KO victory.

13. Wordz Ahgod (1-0) vs 14. Rap Disciple (1-0)

Rap Disciple no-showed so Wordz Ahgod won.

15. Lampejo (10-6) vs 16. GuM WoRk (1-0)

GuM WoRk, aka, Erel Avent, no-showed so Lampejo won.

17. Appocolyptik (1-0) vs. 18. Joe Native (3-4)

This battle was okay, some decent lines in it. Native dropped first and had some pretty creative stuff, but was a bit inconsistent in his verse. Appoc dropped late, but dropped pretty nice with a good number of quotables. Appoc ending up winning this.

19. TEF (5-4) vs. 20. Comedian (6-2)

This battle wasn’t too bad either, but could have been better. TEF suffered from the same problem that’s been haunting him since joining the league, poor wording. Some of his lines were stretched and really just didn’t land even though the concept was there. Comedian came a bit inconsistent, but came much crisper so he came away with the win.

21. Stanza (8-11) vs. 22. Sir Smash’Alot (2-2)

This battle was pretty terrible. Stanza dropped first and came with the same wording and played ideas which have haunted him since joining the league. Smash came awful though, and even swayed in the battle thread. Stanza ended up taking this pretty easily.

23. Luse Cannon (0-2) vs. 24. Player-X415 (0-1)

Luse Cannon no-showed so Player-X415 won.

25. K Illa (0-1) vs. 26. Shiest Lucia (0-0)

This was one of the worst battles from last week. K Illa came as a complete newb often does, pretty terrible. Shiest really didn’t come a whole lot better and only got this because his punches weren’t completely off topic. He didn’t vote, though, so neither won.

27. Feeble Minded (0-0) vs. 28. Serb (0-0)

Serb no-showed so Feeble Minded won.

29. Wyte (0-0) vs. 30. Anthony (0-0)

Anthony no-showed so Wyte won.

31. Ali G (0-0) vs. 32. Otto Octavius (0-0)

Ali G looked like the name of a newb, but he’s clearly just an alias because he dropped pretty nice. A lot of very simple nameplays, but some shit that was worded nicely. Otto came pretty lousy and really didn’t have anything hard hitting in his verse. Ali G got this pretty easily.

33. Grams (2-1) vs. 34. Black_Star (0-0)

Grams was mistakenly left out of original matches and was given a low ranking. He really didn’t seem to put in any effort, but had just enough to take out Blackstar. Blackstar really came pretty bad and will need to work on his punchlines if he wants to compete here.
35. Final (0-0) vs. 36. REMIS (0-0)

REMIS no-showed so Final won.

Verse of the Week

John Hensley

Ya girls like a hotel, so no kid ya didnt choose a winner.
Cuz i paid for one night... n' the next fuckin day a new dude was in her.
I'll have ya body zipped up if ya begin dissin' these.
And create a T-Bag that'll bring back memories of what ya bitch did to me.
I asked a dude if he knew u, and if ya shit's the wackest.
He said yea i gnome, his skills are a myth and they only reach midget status.
Teflon's a perfect name for you, i mean honestly brother.
Cuz ya spend ya time huggin one guys chest while takin shots from another.
We know u look and act retarded, start believin' that i'm right.
I saw tef yellin '' da da daaaa''.. but he's never hearda Mencia in his life.
Ya ain't proof God has a sense of humor, but i still laugh at you.
Because your proof that God smokes weed, drinks and takes acid too.
You're a nice guy, but i'll win and i think that it's clear too.
I'd say see ya in hell, but the only place that i'll see ya's my rearview.
If i win i face Fletcher, and i'll make sure that it gets done.
Face it, ya ain't an old president, but you're just a warm up for Nixon.

Battle of the Week

Nick Fletcher vs. John Hensley

Word, just drop when you get on.

.
.
I'll have you mauled here son, and voters'll be so glad
'Coz we'll see H bomb so hard, Hiroshima won't feel so bad
When I face the champ next week your name'll be known, so have no fear
I'll hit whoever it is with a Nip/Tuck, like I'm promoting ya acting career
I asked about this kid, after I stomped his house 'n' smashed him through
Doctors told me John's status was stable..
.. and his was almost ready to move back in to
It's 3 vs. 4 right here.. and I've made my final decision..
.. to drop next to nothing - so that my verse describes my ranking position
Quote:
Originally Posted by John Hensley.
Ughhh. you callin me kid? you gotta be dumb dude.
The imposters of my imposters imposters could probably son you.

Your name 'n' bars speak wackness.. but, I'll still flip your concepts jew
'Coz the imposters of my imposters imposters told me ure imposters could whore you to
The topic is battling Hensley, and the people expressin' they thoughts..
.. say that fucking with John is a bumpy ride, as a result of genital warts
I'm eager to brawl, I brought weapons 'n' all.. but pistols won't be bared
'Coz if I pulled out Glocks.. history shows that John'll run scared
We know you hardly vote, but this week u need tons of links you gay
Even the ladies are reminding you..
.. but they're talking about the deodorant spray
Even John's girl gives him no action, instead she comes to me, but..
.. the friction between us is immense - when I'm dry humpin' the slut
I said you was weak, but after this you'll give me thankings..
.. for boosting you to a perfect ten - in the fucking rankings.

Word.

Oh, and if you don't get anything then DO NOT VOTE!!

Vs.


I see right through that. n' it's not because i listen alot.
We know ya really mean..
... '' i'm depressed, and your mag's the only one that's ever given me props''
And if i mention our last battle how could you NOT be scared.
Don't bring up it makin HOF. we both know it's my verse that fuckin got u there.
Ya name is pure irony. considerin' it's christmas time now.
As far as the ranks go..
.. this Nick doesn't need cookies, milk OR a chimney to slide down.
^^With ya sex shit, the pedephiles got the same plan but its gettin hectic.
You sneak into a house, offer kids somethin from your sack.. n' then get arrested.
Ya lines are like Britney's sex pics since her career has slowed.
Everyone's hyped to see..
.. but once ya do you realize they'd only be good if it was 5 years ago.
Clint Eastwood movies even prove that you're gettin too lucky.
Cuz im the good, ur the bad.. n' it's a tie between u and ya bitch for the ugly.
You can thank bad eyesight for ya girl cuz it all equates.
Hindsights 20/20.. aka the vision she WISHED she had when she 1st saw ur face.
I wonder if life and death are similiar, i'm hopin they're not.
But with ur poor ass 1 thing'll stay the same.. u'll be spendin' both ina box.
Next week i'm scopin for Glocks to see who can write better.
If you plan on goin face to face witha gun, be sure to include a suicide letter.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nick Fletcher
And who the fuck would want to say they are Hensley. He used to be mad dope, but I think he has lost some of his skill now. ...The shit gets boring after a while.

So here i am, same guy who'll leave ya ass rattled.
The same guy who lost his skill..
.. same guy who's boring.. n' the same guy who shut u the fuck out in our last battle.

Winner: John Hensley

No-Show Shine

DaTrusHurtz

http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=235309
^^^ - Link to my last battle against Erel Avent

Erel Avent IP = C0D8 25EA
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=237924
GuM WoRk! IP = IP: C0D8 25EA
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=237987

In Gum Work's Battle Last Week:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Erel Avent
Aura that shit was ugly. What the fuck thats the worse verse I have EVER seen from you in your entire text career fuck boy. But you still won lol.

v: Gum

Hmmmmmmm
I know it seems like this match is too tough to chew
But, I'm seein' ur Gum Work...
... on makin' a wack alias' to beat newbs
Now when Stanza didn't leave 4 links u bitched n' moaned
N' yes last week u voted on 4 battles...
... but 1 of them was your own!
Ur a walking personal, I KO'd ya, n' put a bitch in his place
Shitt, the firepower u supply could put a NASA ship up in space
U left RV for a few months, but no one missed u queer
I'm facin' the Great Houdini...
... expose him for biting, and he disappears
This is vet speak, the future of the league's been set geek
Kempo told me to clean the trash out...
... AKA, don't expect a battle next week
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dame Dash
Erel Avent = biting and voting for himself whack faggot

Now, u seem to think girls run to u cuz u make their day brighter
I've seen u make a Dame Dash...
... away, screamin "THIS FAGGOT'S A BITER!"
Twelve n' Five? Damn, that ain't half bad, shit dude
Ur rec could challenge Roger Maris
... 62% of ur wins are through bitch moves
I got plans, need to do homework, no time to appear
^^^ Those are just some excuses...
... kinda like your ENTIRE CAREER

LMAO, I win again

Wordz Ahgod

This kid is nothing, So he dont 'matter like pure filtered air
And the cyphers been dead....I can tell coz your verse is still there
Even your hoe knows, I clap till her back is red
Please tell nas that Hip Hops' alive---->'Coz its Rap thats dead
Sucker, your fillers are in'finite, and your wak lines are in'famouse
But no matter how much you get in'to...you'll never catch in'terest
So kill yourself, no one fears ya verse...nore do they see potencial
Your to decipher gods work, But insted you made the cypher something Wordz AhGod wouldnt wanna get into

Feeble Minded

This faggot sucks... & if you get votes, it's cuz RV hates to please me
My attitude about this battle is relaxed, cuz vs. Serb I'll take it easy
Plus one look at your past verses n I know I'll be splittin ya wig
Your verse? The voters will be more interested in the clip in ya sig
Next week hopefully someone that doesnt suck will be replacing your rhymes
right quick, and if you don't you'll only be wasting your time...
Ya past finished, fucking garbage ass newbie, with a trash image
The sad thing is, this key will beat u even if u show at the last minute
Defeat this... nah bitch... my played lines i been coming by recent
are only cuz I wish I'd face hensley..or somebody decent

Final

Remis a pussy, To handle ur beef, u run for the bat, kid
i tryed diggin up ur ways of fighting,
. . . n` ended up with the name in ya wack sig
Plus ya fat bitch,
most men love ur looks, so ya mackin` skills surpass me
cuz even all the girls yell Oh remis!! - so fuckin` nasty
N` im dope with the swag, and my rhymin is bar none
But how u spose to be fly - when you cant even scar one
I'm makin` hit tracks on thursdays, while ur drinkin by the bar
but its cuz ur cd`s already good - for playin` frisby out the car
You get excited over christmas, u got spirit 'round ya place
but if i EVER see your presence - im`a bash u in ya face