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-   -   C.S. Crew Collab. Dec. 05' (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=216695)

Willa 12-10-05 01:40 AM

C.S. Crew Collab. Dec. 05'
 
The Pendulum Swing

Atticus
Its...nothing, all my fucking emotions fall dry,
eyes lit of fires sit expired to a broken cry.
Living this drift of a life, just, kissing a knife,
slit by depression...blades lips ripping a site.
Everyday consistence dancing an instant away...
wasting in sorrow, hallow...nothing more than plain.
Back and forth teeters the sands last whim,
while the hourglass blackens as the pendulum swings.

Ill Technique
I'm Held Down Brutaly To Truthfully Meet Gravity
As My Life Is Manifested Into A Gruesom Reality
Placing My Vision Through The Eyes Of A Barrel
For I Cock It Back And Watch The Hollow Tip Settle
And My Last Seconds Set In While I'm Wreckin
Testin My Medication For Hell's Inn, Were I'm Headin
You'd Be As Mad As Me, If You Had The Key
To Open Doors To Have A Life Half As Bad As Me
Cuase I'm With Satan Contemplatin' This Day
And The Other Line Rings, It's God on Two Way
So I'll Make Sure You Hear Me Now As Life Rings
Bring A Sudden Death As The Pendilum Swings

NaRc-UzI
Supplying vivid emotions with every message in my arsenal
Precious moments are rienforced By the almighty powerfull
Darkness overlaps the sunshine from portraying its beauty
Harvest changing while obtaing my gem Like a saphire ruby
Heartless ideas are swayed by The swinging of the pendulum
Artist hypnotized by The brightness of the magnified spectrum
Mezmorised by the polygons that are falling on my conscience
Realized the controlling of life is the cause of all my problems
I feel free like cactus but the changes of life defies my status
Dying alone cause no one could roam through my apparatus
Percived as harmless the way reality keeps my mind hidden
The pendulum swing scrapes a bit of hope wich is forbidden
The Movement swaying straight foward and back it relates
Rythem Vibrates But Change is what it really demonstrates

Mystic Chaos
Conciously unaware what beholds at my very presence of Commotion
Motion to Notion, swinging with pride, & yet with vengence belaying
Rappidly swaying, Illusively, back and forth like hung cot's..
Time's not a factor, although the movement staggers at each notch.
The speed stops, slowly haulting after day breaks and the moon rises
With new surprises vastly improving on speed just what is needs
It arises to please the company of every living human being
Cant be seeing, now having temtations to quicken the pace
To push the Pendelum faster, the time is against life in the race
Times a disgrace slowly loosing speed and falling off of the face
Of the maps trace, connecting all dots but still the pendelum continues to sway.

Chymera
Please...sway away. A majesty aged
under the thunders of tragedies blame.
Wide eyes sustain blunderless paces
left to right, then the shutterless cave in.
Eye lids link together to kiss in a wink's
tether... Letters to the mind find the ink
to edit. Gentle hymns settle just then sing
before, cut short by a pendulums swing.
The wrecking ball falls, its lust dissecting
the wings of all freely seen bisecting
the hours by excepting. Flowers now
wither in there prime, towers down...
The hourglass has now bowed over.
Over and over the past rounds closer.
The last long sands stand to form God;
as his fists twist and become the world's clock.

Mentalz
..Make note the illusive fluid, as it ripples the canvas stanza..
The tangant phantom grandfather's Tic' inriched bananza
..Include the lucid movement, as it performs to the chords..
Of a life torn in judgement, from the peak down to the shores
It wreaks from pores, engrossed readily.. steadily swaying
As The Pendulum Swings heavily across the aging painting
Staged the blaming, to denounce the compound rash tactics
So I'm constantly placing aim at the surrounding clash of fanatics
To bad it's static, only to my eyes can I see the rue movement
Shrewd and prudent, as I inquire higher and choose to prove it
To loose the trueness, my soul subconsciencly adheres the course
As remourse is here to hear resort to something more heavenly
So brevity heads my leveling, stops to contort a life in shambles
Until one by one the candles, remain unlit as they sit in waiting
..Ever changing like my lifes decisions .. forever rearanging..

Willa 12-10-05 01:41 AM

Links incoming asap.

Mentalz 12-10-05 02:01 AM

Dope drop Amanda. ;)

For every feedback this thread gets Willa and Myself will RTF together. 1 for 2, cant beat that!

Dervla 12-10-05 08:16 AM

Atticus- o0o0o0o0 your drop was decent, had a good powerful source of Emotion. Nothing much to say here, it was too short. Lol.

Ill Technique- Nice wordplay you got there. Decent imaginary.

NaRc-UzI- Did not know you do Topical as well, but anyways you had a good source of imaginary and the flow was decent. I liked the way you balanced your vocab. It was complex and Direct. Dang you got the longest feed from me at this point, lol.

Mystic- You was all right, you had good source of imaginary in your verse and the vocab was decent. Ok drop on your part.

Chymera aka Atticus- Another drop from you huh? Lol ok this was decent drop and this time you had metaphors which I Liked. The imaginary in your drop was good and very portrait. Keep it up.

Mentalz- Alright now, you had a good verse in the category of Imaginary. Very well portrait but vivid.

Well That’s all the feed I got, But I want ya’ll to know this was a good drop by all of ya’ll the imaginary was decent and Atticus hold onto the Emotion side of this OM and Narc-Uzi Held onto the Imaginary side of this OM. The rest ya’ll was like frontlines in Pawns in Chess, great drop by all of ya’ll.

Mentalz Leave feed on my New OM.Link in sig.

Mentalz 12-10-05 10:00 AM

Chymera is Atticus' old account, however the person USING this account right now is NOT Atticus. Therefore we can conclude that they are two seperate peoples at this point. ;)

Thanks for the feed Lola!!! feed inc.

Lampejo 12-10-05 11:03 AM

This is Peter Quince from Sixshot.com and RM, I've also got an account on Allpoetry.com. But ya, Atticus gave me this account cuz I was to lazy to create one.

Mentalz 12-10-05 11:07 AM

Haha, loon.....

Mentalz 12-10-05 11:52 AM

http://community.rapverse.com/showt...399#post2570399
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=216679

Willa 12-10-05 12:58 PM

i will return feed on every feed we get drop a link to an open mic poem song audio battle anything

Dickard. 12-10-05 02:00 PM

uppin..........

MetªPhySikZ 12-10-05 03:20 PM

Atticus: had nice emotion, content was nice and so was structure, made it for an easy read from where your flow lagged...flow was nice though, mos def an ez read...

fav lines:
Living this drift of a life, just, kissing a knife,
slit by depression...blades lips ripping a site.
Everyday consistence dancing an instant away...
wasting in sorrow, hallow...nothing more than plain.

Ill Technique: coo wordplay, and flow was nice..content was sick, kept my interest, nice even structure as well made it an easy read

fav lines:
And My Last Seconds Set In While I'm Wreckin
Testin My Medication For Hell's Inn, Were I'm Headin
You'd Be As Mad As Me, If You Had The Key
To Open Doors To Have A Life Half As Bad As Me
^sick...feelin the hell's inn

Uzi: more poetic approach, nasty vocab, sick imagery....coo flow....and structure was sick as well

fav lines:
Darkness overlaps the sunshine from portraying its beauty
Harvest changing while obtaing my gem Like a saphire ruby
Heartless ideas are swayed by The swinging of the pendulum
Artist hypnotized by The brightness of the magnified spectrum
Mezmorised by the polygons that are falling on my conscience
^nasty enough said....

Mystic Chaos: like ur other drop, lines are long, but held an abstract flow, nice read had a load of elements in it, just need to up the rhyme scheme a tad... good shit

fav lines:
Time's not a factor, although the movement staggers at each notch.
The speed stops, slowly haulting after day breaks and the moon rises
With new surprises vastly improving on speed just what is needs
It arises to please the company of every living human being
^sick, had a nasty image appeal to it

Chymera: nice poetry approach, felt the content/imagery in this segement, went well with the others....

Fav lines:
wither in there prime, towers down...
The hourglass has now bowed over.
Over and over the past rounds closer.
The last long sands stand to form God;
as his fists twist and become the world's clock.
^loved the hourglass line...went very smoothly with the rest of your segment

MentalZ: vocab was locked down, flow was sick too....good shit

Favlines:
It wreaks from pores, engrossed readily.. steadily swaying
As The Pendulum Swings heavily across the aging painting
Staged the blaming, to denounce the compound rash tactics
So I'm constantly placing aim at the surrounding clash of fanatics
^sickkk....enough said....had the flow, and vocab to relay the topic/metaphor very appropriately


keep the collabs coming...shit was nice
stay up and keep the pens writing
`1

NaRc-UzI 12-10-05 05:45 PM

Thanks for the feedback

Dickard. 12-10-05 05:53 PM

thanks for the feedback dawg.

NaRc-UzI 12-11-05 06:24 AM

Uppin For More Feedback

Tech (banned) 12-11-05 11:56 AM

Thanks For The Feedback Everyone.................Uppin This.
.


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