For$aken vs Tupac8888
 

Battle Rules:

Topical
6 - 10 Lines
No Crew Votes
No Recycling
No Biting
Topic: Struggle

Minimum posts to vote: 20

Check in by: 08-03-04 at 10:40 PM

Must drop verse in 4320 minutes after check in.

Tupac8888 has ACCEPTED this battle on 07-31-04 10:42 PM.

For$akeN has ACCEPTED this battle on 07-31-04 11:05 PM.

i'll go ez and basic on you...

discrimination is my number one enemy will it ever desist?
I scream out in every night in agony can it ever persist
I hold the pain in till I burst with nothing left to sustain
I pray to god to let me die this hate I can not contain
My heart tells me to go on and commit a easily done sucide
but I'm afraid if I sin I won't go to Heaven that I despise
but still...I have a family to support and a job to work...
I can not leave them alone to perish even if I go berserk
to my children I will not find the evil to ever be heartless
even with fiends terrorizing my life, death I will not possess

Sweat released and pouring out of me as if I were a faucet--
First time at this and struggling to succeed so i fought it--
I feel the tension in my quads as i slide in and out of the hole--
And how she moaned with emotion it had me out of control--
To perfect this moment was tough but i still would tried my best--
To give her the pleasure of a queen and take burdens off her chest---
And the morning after was harder to slip out without a trace--
To think what a dirty mess of cum i had left on her face--
Walked slowly so the boards wouldnt creak in the hall--
Cause this shit, for me, was the toughest booty call--

Voted For: For$akeN

nice piece good feeling and overall story tellin,you involved alot into this,it was'nt jus st8..it had a few different views..
2nd verse i dint like at all 4 this topic even with an open mind i don't see how it connected with a "struggle"other than that i thought it was a funny verse but you dint stay on topic..bad move pac

return da vote:http://community.rapverse.com/showb...ad.php?t=138655

Voted For: For$akeN


Sweat released and pouring out of me as if I were a faucet--
First time at this and struggling to succeed so i fought it--
5/10
I feel the tension in my quads as i slide in and out of the hole--
And how she moaned with emotion it had me out of control--
5/10
To perfect this moment was tough but i still would tried my best--
To give her the pleasure of a queen and take burdens off her chest---
6/10
And the morning after was harder to slip out without a trace--
To think what a dirty mess of cum i had left on her face--
5/10
Walked slowly so the boards wouldnt creak in the hall--
Cause this shit, for me, was the toughest booty call--
5/10

discrimination is my number one enemy will it ever desist?
I scream out in every night in agony can it ever persist
7/10
I hold the pain in till I burst with nothing left to sustain
I pray to god to let me die this hate I can not contain
6/10
My heart tells me to go on and commit a easily done sucide
but I'm afraid if I sin I won't go to Heaven that I despise
7/10
but still...I have a family to support and a job to work...
I can not leave them alone to perish even if I go berserk
7/10
to my children I will not find the evil to ever be heartless
even with fiends terrorizing my life, death I will not possess
7/10


Came down 2 harder punches and better wordplay

lmao at punches//

Voted For: For$akeN

Tupac8888

Sweat released and pouring out of me as if I were a faucet--
First time at this and struggling to succeed so i fought it--
I feel the tension in my quads as i slide in and out of the hole--
And how she moaned with emotion it had me out of control--
To perfect this moment was tough but i still would tried my best--
To give her the pleasure of a queen and take burdens off her chest---
And the morning after was harder to slip out without a trace--
To think what a dirty mess of cum i had left on her face--
Walked slowly so the boards wouldnt creak in the hall--
Cause this shit, for me, was the toughest booty call--

This wasnt terrible but it wasnt really on topic. It wouldve been tight if the topic was your first booty call but its not really about struggle at all. You had predictable rhymes but it flowed pretty good. It was basic and the -- was annoying but it was so-so.


For$akeN

discrimination is my number one enemy will it ever desist?
I scream out in every night in agony can it ever persist
I hold the pain in till I burst with nothing left to sustain
I pray to god to let me die this hate I can not contain
My heart tells me to go on and commit a easily done sucide
but I'm afraid if I sin I won't go to Heaven that I despise
but still...I have a family to support and a job to work...
I can not leave them alone to perish even if I go berserk
to my children I will not find the evil to ever be heartless
even with fiends terrorizing my life, death I will not possess

This really said struggle to me it was real on topic. Some of the stuff was worded funny but it got the job done and you came out on top.

Up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(1)......................

Voted For: For$akeN

FORESAKEN WINS OVER THIS SICK FUCK THE BITCH HAS NO BUISINESS CALLIN EMSELF TUPAC ILL BATTLE YOU ANYTIME MY VOTE GOES TO FORSAKEN

Voted For: For$akeN

Forsaken-Nice vocab, stayed on topic, a real life understandable situation with a constant flow and a nice structure, liked it 7/10

Tupac-Struggling on making a booty call? didn't like it at all...thought it was lame