Lemme kno what u think
 

It’s the OPEN MIC where I like to spray strikes that’s
Humble always Ready 2 rumble I tumble through life in a jumble
Still find time to chill and take a break and make raps
That are unbelievable unconceivable its nourishing flourishing
Great FREESTYLES neva senile their ductile the words
Of an ASIAN it’s the invasion got methods of evasion
Clamming, cramming, jamming rhymes in my head
Other MCs start worrying hurrying scurrying away
They start expiring retiring I’m transpiring getting
You wrench drench u on the bench I’m freeing while u fleeing
Rappers failing I’m impaling don’t be bailing out
And bilking stop milking better be expediting your
Writing make something exiting cats colliding sliding
Deciding to run there getting douse in there house
My style is a puzzle hard to figure out its bigga
My MIC is booming consuming dooming you till
You extinct its already distinct I got the NINJA FORCE
Of course u might wanna indorse in me cuz u see
You’re a doormat always stepped on c’mon
While you dogs be stretching fetching bones
I’m being astounding grounding u into meat
Throw u on the street so the bums can eat my punchlines
Are a swagger sharp as a dagger my rhyme scheme
Is prevailing tailing noone son the word play I’m
Transmitting spitting hitting at u it cause applause
So dope don’t grope when I’m rapping I’m clapping
Your head crapping on your flow u crow out but
You can’t be heard burying u wit my words dumb turd
I’m Murdering you on the MIC till u quiver and shiver
Your brother hooked on SONIC Your sister hooked on PHONICS
You hooked on CHRONIC u flaking raking taking your spits
From others mad cuz I’m chilling illing willing to FREESTYLE
Any time your watch is old like cha rhymes I’m rallying tallying
My sprays I got to many your disses are small as a penny
You still rasping gasping grasping my personals now bitch
Don’t try to match my FREESTYLING ability my agility this reality
Is not for u your metaphors areabore what info are you reaping
Leaping away but my metaphors are the core of the earth its hot
Do not be someone you ain’t betta revoke don’t provoke me dude
Don’t try to allude what wit your attitude this spits a gamble
But will leave u in shambles your voice faltering like u rhymes
Altering you steez but jeez don’t try don’t say u fly get ready
to die




ASIAN PRIDE!

C'mon gimme feedback

honestly,,you need some work it was'nt terrible but your style is kinda weak,only cause of your ryme scheme though..you double up 2 often n some of it jus don't sound good...jus try n spit it you'll see what i mean bout it not sounding right...work on your structure n get some puntuation in your verse cause that helps the reader understand how its supposed ta flow....no hate yo,its jus my opinion...

looked more like def poetry than rap...work on ur scheme n structure but ur doin good keep it up holla n thanx for da love on my post peace

NOT BAD BUT LET ME DROP THIS RIGHT HERE HOME

my blend swarm like a strong widstorm on OPEN MIC spit choking type lyrics cats cough up blood ain't no soft scrub, toss love to chick I'm thug and quick with gatts
sick wit stats got the best flow like an Eskimo, with art battle and leave marks on cattle MC's hearts rattle when they think about me

Thanx for the feedback