Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
08-03-04, 03:48 PM | #1 | |||||||
New to RB
|
Lemme kno what u think
IP: 9FB7 7C10
It’s the OPEN MIC where I like to spray strikes that’s
Humble always Ready 2 rumble I tumble through life in a jumble Still find time to chill and take a break and make raps That are unbelievable unconceivable its nourishing flourishing Great FREESTYLES neva senile their ductile the words Of an ASIAN it’s the invasion got methods of evasion Clamming, cramming, jamming rhymes in my head Other MCs start worrying hurrying scurrying away They start expiring retiring I’m transpiring getting You wrench drench u on the bench I’m freeing while u fleeing Rappers failing I’m impaling don’t be bailing out And bilking stop milking better be expediting your Writing make something exiting cats colliding sliding Deciding to run there getting douse in there house My style is a puzzle hard to figure out its bigga My MIC is booming consuming dooming you till You extinct its already distinct I got the NINJA FORCE Of course u might wanna indorse in me cuz u see You’re a doormat always stepped on c’mon While you dogs be stretching fetching bones I’m being astounding grounding u into meat Throw u on the street so the bums can eat my punchlines Are a swagger sharp as a dagger my rhyme scheme Is prevailing tailing noone son the word play I’m Transmitting spitting hitting at u it cause applause So dope don’t grope when I’m rapping I’m clapping Your head crapping on your flow u crow out but You can’t be heard burying u wit my words dumb turd I’m Murdering you on the MIC till u quiver and shiver Your brother hooked on SONIC Your sister hooked on PHONICS You hooked on CHRONIC u flaking raking taking your spits From others mad cuz I’m chilling illing willing to FREESTYLE Any time your watch is old like cha rhymes I’m rallying tallying My sprays I got to many your disses are small as a penny You still rasping gasping grasping my personals now bitch Don’t try to match my FREESTYLING ability my agility this reality Is not for u your metaphors areabore what info are you reaping Leaping away but my metaphors are the core of the earth its hot Do not be someone you ain’t betta revoke don’t provoke me dude Don’t try to allude what wit your attitude this spits a gamble But will leave u in shambles your voice faltering like u rhymes Altering you steez but jeez don’t try don’t say u fly get ready to die ASIAN PRIDE! |
|||||||
08-03-04, 07:03 PM | #2 | |||||||
New to RB
|
IP: 9FB7 7C10
C'mon gimme feedback
|
|||||||
08-04-04, 06:51 PM | #3 | ||||
<<NaMe ReTiReD>>
|
IP: 88E6 6CAA
honestly,,you need some work it was'nt terrible but your style is kinda weak,only cause of your ryme scheme though..you double up 2 often n some of it jus don't sound good...jus try n spit it you'll see what i mean bout it not sounding right...work on your structure n get some puntuation in your verse cause that helps the reader understand how its supposed ta flow....no hate yo,its jus my opinion...
|
||||
08-05-04, 12:19 AM | #4 | ||||||
fuck da hataz B.A.M 4 life
|
IP: 3D70 8FED
looked more like def poetry than rap...work on ur scheme n structure but ur doin good keep it up holla n thanx for da love on my post peace
__________________
VOTE IN THESE SLEPT ON BATTLES N ILL RETURN DA FAVOR WIT HONEST VOTES |
||||||
08-05-04, 07:36 AM | #5 | ||||||
Middle Weight
|
IP: 005F B7E2
NOT BAD BUT LET ME DROP THIS RIGHT HERE HOME
my blend swarm like a strong widstorm on OPEN MIC spit choking type lyrics cats cough up blood ain't no soft scrub, toss love to chick I'm thug and quick with gatts sick wit stats got the best flow like an Eskimo, with art battle and leave marks on cattle MC's hearts rattle when they think about me |
||||||
08-05-04, 09:27 AM | #6 | |||||||
New to RB
|
IP: 9FB7 7C10
Thanx for the feedback
|
|||||||
Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
Display Modes | |
|
|