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Multi Arrange-Ments
My el-e-ment is verbal development,
Lines composed of herbal designed embellishments, Pre-defined by third eyes and unkind compelling hit's, That undermind the weaker sign's trying to re-transmit, Point of view's exchanging clue's not so obvious, Between the lines lie's sign's of the eternal bliss, Arranging shrines deviner than all that exist's, Just keep in mind and find out you will soon admitt, Take this lesson as a heart felt blessin, To change your mind so that you won't be stressin, Just addressin and assessin some abstract out of the word work corrections, Of view finder switch's not glitch's inside my main existance, I'm made of kinder not blinder definer's of persistence, To make you not break you and form harder resistence, Against the making of faking arranging of asisstance, I've been ordered to forward a message to your head, To go preach it and speak it exactly how i said, Not disordered, contorted or tainted evil read, Just to shove it above what is already dead, |
~*~*~*~*~ Feed Back Would Be Half Decent ~*~*~*~*~
Would Highly Appriciate It... |
Ya'll Stop Sleeping On This.. I Know I Could Of Improved It..!!!
But Ya'll Could Leave Some Feedback... Whether.. It Be Positive... Or Negative... |
lol...I read it... it was cool for being away as long as you have ... i liked it... i think the ending could have been better but not bad... beginning was real strong... started to lose me a little at the 4th paragraph... but again... i liked it overall
The Definition *subliminal message*...lol |
lol ... DapzZz...... *Good Lookin* ..!!
Appriciate The FeedBack...!!!! Don't Know How You Got Lost... But...!!! I Guess Anything Is Possible....!!!!!!! |
nice poem. very good. when you make another one holla.
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Daym baby girl... nice solid piece here.... the first part was good... the vocab you used in it was good... the structure was good... each stanza had good points and was all well put out.... keep it up baby
hit mine up if you can Litmus Test 1 love babygirl |
Nice poem girl, this had great flow and dope vocabulary, i was feelin this drop, keep it up, you have great style......1
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Quote:
**Appriciate The FeedBack.... BabeGyal** ... Respect' ....!!!!! Upppin! |
Ya'll Stop Sleeping On This.. I Know I Could Of Improved It..!!!
But Ya'll Could Leave Some Feedback... Whether.. It Be Positive... Or Negative... Leave A Link.. And I Will Most Deff Return The Favor... ' ..!!! |
dannnnnnnggggggggg this was a really good piece for you being away for some time...flowed beautifuly.....multis off the hook.....vocab was great...to me it didnt seem to fall off near the end like the others said cuz they just didnt understand the meanin of your perspective of words in it........keep it up beautiful....post some feedback on my first poem in my sig......graci
peace~1 |
nice piece, dml... but u need to work on the end cuz it fell off a lil' but you not bad as a poetess, keep workin' at it, and take it easy on the vocab cuz u don't need to prove nothin'... poetry is meant to be pleasing to the ear, you don't have to get technical with it, just keep the emotion factor and focus on the topic and you're str8...
pz.. |
Damn, that was pretty hot. You kept it coming and ended pretty strong although these other people don't think you did. Most everyone wants their stuff to be preached to the world, so I thought that was tight.
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nice shit ma, sounds kinda like sumthin i'd do....check mine out...
keep it up....~1~ |
.. - Appriciate The Feed Back People, Thanks - ..
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