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Konqlusion. vs C-Bo
Battle Rules:
10 Minimum, 14 Line Maximum. No Crew Votes No Recycling No Biting Topical Battle, Topic Is...-You Are On Death Row.Do Not Vote If You Do Not Understand The Content Of Eithier Verse. Minimum posts to vote: 250 Check in by: 12-18-04 at 01:11 PM Must drop verse in 360 minutes after check in. |
C-Bo has ACCEPTED this battle on 12-18-04 12:43 PM.
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Konqlusion. has ACCEPTED this battle on 12-18-04 12:44 PM.
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no light, there's only darkness from my bedpost, as fright twirls around like dancers do..
i gotta record, yes im on death row, but there's a different knight that i answer to.. strange sounds from grown men, gangs prowl but round here it aint a known trend.. cuz if the govenor phones in, then the list of lifers gets thin like seein bones n skin.. the system aint a fair route, + there's no courtesy when they pull this kinda chair out.. or the gas chamber, on-lookers will stare south, but i guess i asked for danger.. cuz my ass was angered, seein my wife cheat, chiefin trees, yea i had to hang her.. it was funnier than Kramer, & similar to anglers, i poked dude w/ various poles n hooks .. then stood in the back of the court to see how far the judge could throw the book.. got low-spirited n shook, cuz it wasn't threats as she said death was the only option.. got no help from Johnny Cochran, now ima lonely convict who got homies watchin.. as i got escorted away, they sayin i have Hell to pay, but i cant afford it today.. off to a resort of gays, dished money to stay hetero, see extortion pays.. snortin yay, u would too if u knew ur time was limited, wish i did a crime of timidness but it had vividness, now my grave is like a hit, got cats diggin it.. so the call was made and the day is here but it dont appear too attrractive to me.. |
Past Action's Rebound Internally, & Stir Up Vile Emotion's. Recalling Clinching The Blade & Manuvering It In A Frantic Motion. Light's Flooded My Sight, Red & Blue Obscured My Sense's. I Was Guilty Of 1 Crime, But Not These False Allegation's & Pretense's. Anger & Corruption Invaded Harmonious Memory's Of My Child. Passion Of My Lover, Driving My Craving's Disorderly & Wild.... But I Was In The Belly Of The Beast, No Method Of Escape. Fellow Inmate's & Criminal's Victimised Of Mean's Like Rape. Clock's Are Winding Down, Got 24 Hour's Left To My Demise. Pray To The Lord That My Child & Girl Will Lead a Decent Life. But If Christ Loved Me, Surely I'd Be Saved From This Fate?.. Or Maybe I Was Punished, For Not Aquiring Money I Could Make. I'd Been Involved In Gang Beating's,Theft,Drug's & Case's Of Retrobution. Nothing In This World I Ever Did, Was a Effort, Or a Fucking Contribution. |
Voted For: Konqlusion.
Thiss Wass A Good Topic Battle But Konglusion Verse Wass Better It Seemed A Little Realer Tha C-Bo's He Had Vokab And Tha Verse Wass Well Struktured So Konglusion Gets Mih Vote.......9.8/10 Leave A Honest Vote In Mih Battle... http://community.rapverse.com/showb...ad.php?t=166333 |
Upping This Battle, C What Happened To Yiur Structure Man?
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^^i don't know wut happened...i really do topicals...i really jus like battlin...i was jus testin my topical skills out
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yo uppin this....quit sleepin...this battle needs votes...
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uppin............................................. ..........
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This was feedback posted for Konqlusion.
okay this was a good battle but i felt konqlusion came harder with vocab and imagry
kon-aight you had very good vocab..........you had a good storyline..............conveyed the topic clear...............good flow...........this topic really didnt have emotion but more a i guess hardness to the point for the topic..........you did that good......good structure and imagry was good......... overall 8/10 c-bo-aight u had a good storyline and you conveyed the topic realy well but your vocab was decent cuz you had some but not much............you had good flow..........imagry was there..........structure was consistant even tho it went over to the next line each line pretty much stayed even.........but it does kinda throw off the look of the structure........you had the hardness pretty good........but i just wasnt feeling your verse as much as kon's...........just up your vocab and work on not stretchin your lines as much..... overall 6/10 v/konqlusion if i could vote....:( rtf links in sig |
can we please get some votes...uppin this...............
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uppin this........................................
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can someone please vote please...uppin this for like the 100th time
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uppin............................................. ..
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