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A Day Of My Life
This was a topical battle.
Light (morning) Woke up, by the light of the sun rays shining through my window My body feeling so mellow, felt the wetness on my face from the pillow Brushed my teeth. now it'sall white and clean, ready to face the day of reality but before i do that, my body needs to be fresh, the water gives me more energy got on some fresh clothes, walked out the door, lefting my head admiring the sun beauty Seeing kids outside having time of there lifes, i crack a smile, while smilling its air earthy The flowers showing they're beautiful face, and it's not even spring. I take a second to embrace Birds soaring freedomly through the air, sounds of chirps ehoes through my ear.O what a great day I'm telling you pieces by pieces of the morning beauty and art, It's also a day of my life As i get in the car,and i take a second to hold my emotions in until i get to the destination of my life Dawn (evening) In my car playing a jazz cd, got me in the mood of remembering the memories i had My eyes get's red as i get close to my destination, the review mirror signaling that i am sad Tears starts pouring down on my cheeks, and telling myself "why you have to go and leave me?" Although you've done your job by protecting and guiding me, but still it hurts me deeply when ya left thee After my heart has stop or still beating, i'll still love you. When my brain dies, i'll still cherish the memories i keep telling myself that i want to die, cause this pain is hurting me, and i can't live like thee I get emotional by looking at your pictures on the wall, I'll get more emotional by seeing you face to face i'll do everything to get that one chance to talk to you, that soon will come god please dont close the gate Dark (night) Finally reached my destination, and looked down, no shining by the sun As i kneel my tears starts pouering down like rain, my unclear voice says "hi mom" i'll get links tomorrow, tired going to sleep. pz. Leave feed. |
holy shit my fellow crew mem.....that was a solid piece....structure was blah, but it didnt really matter because there was so much emotion, i didn't notice.....wow, i even read it twice, your wording in some places was poor, but the first verse just seemed like it would be a happy piece, then you changed to sad, just so much emotion....wow, that was good, i enjoyed it, made me wanna cry kinda, hahahha, good piece mista.
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Thanx man.........uppin for more feedback..............
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Everything here was dope..but you need to short ya bars
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^^ Yeh, thanx for the feedback...............uppin........
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uppo..............................................
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wow this piece had so much emotion and your imagery was real good.....could see everything as it was happening y'know......9/10....anyway holla at me for that collabo.....
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^^ Fo sho i'll get at you with a callab, but girl it's kinda hard to get a topic that me and you can do................uppin for more feedbacks
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Ayo ......Nice drop.....Alot of emotion n all....had alot of creativity too it.....Your structure was Blah.....But still i thought it was a nice piece....overall- 9.2/10.....Keep up tha good work......
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^^ Thanks wickedone....................................I thought you didn't like me?.....
Uppin |
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