RapVerse.com Community - The Answerless Questioning

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The Answerless Questioning

Among a sheepless manger;
dancing the herder's pristine sickle.
A silent pace slithers along
the edge of its own epiphany.

Eyes flutter in an awaking prison.
Vibrant gates of hopeless glory grip
its own snarled fangs of razor wire
to offer itself the glutinous sacrifice,
of it's own handicapped children.

A perfect cell wall pronounces.
Whispers sweet hymns into deaf ears
as it calls forth the blind child.
Guides across shards of broken judgment
just to tickle his own sick fancy.

Embracing every serrated kiss,
I welcome the next gash with a smile.
Open my mouth wide;
as time bombs set on a frail tongue.

Make the mark of my master,
scribble his name of invisible ink.
He grins in delight at my obedience.

This hissing snake giggles;
gazing upon my conformist soul.
Trembling within the coil
of a serpentine homestead.
As with each thought of blasphemy
I stand on one more pin,
stare before I wink one more needle;
victim one more tear with punishment.

................

Fell asleep in the good book,
awoke gagged between its lines.
Dabbled in a thought of my own,
until the author re-scripted mankind.

props on this piece great vocab meaning and ur structure is really clean props

:) Thanks alot for your feedback.

I think this piece is pretty fuckahn' dope Chym... Now I know what Atty's talkin' about! :) Vocab was good, concept good, hell... everything was good and the way you drove it home was excellant.

I loved that last verse the most... so much detail and emotion. Props Fams.

Keep Writing.

Peace.

Pretty good. Nice use of vocabulary. Loving the concept and your approach, the use of your metaphors was hard hitting. Imagery was vividly decent, emotion was some-what like velvet quiet and soft. This is a good poem, nicly done.

Thanks alot for the feedback everyone.

Fell asleep in the good book,
awoke gagged between its lines.
Dabbled in a thought of my own,
until the author re-scripted mankind
I like, I like .... nicce job.
ur a natural

i assume this is old and u must leave 2 links for upping it but ill still leave feedback,the emotion was boring kind of but ok, the imagery was good, the structure and format was clean the concept was ok...vocab great, overall a decent read man.