Deceased Flow
 

In our lifestyle today we have to think twice of where our children play/
Slugs followed from nines ,knives take lives, Now its like we're in a warzone with nowhere to hide/
Stop the violence, Youths on the streets too scared to discuss put in silence/
Stop the Drugs, Deprived children need their parents attention before it turns them against the word..../
Love..everything and anything even if means blood sarifices for your family..so that they stay../
Above all criticism and hate it's like the word's of another decide our.../
Fate in this chamber we call a earth but all we do to communicate is cause..../
Hurt..the people you love and you'll miss them all when their with the lord.../
Above.. and all stay true to your lady, dont mess around with chicks and show them your.../
Shady cause a woman is a privledge not a right keep the peace and it keeps the pussy.../
Tight like the way this flow is soundin....kinda like how this story's../
Impounded running through your brain like Dr Seuss hauntin your cerebrum antagonizin ya makin ya .../
Insane...its sad some youths try and end it with one slice of a .../
Vein..but if you stop it before it starts and give a child your heart it will stop the .../
Pain caused by suffering from growth and if you love your children swear to take this.../
Oath that you will never leave their side, even if they murder, tell the judge its the law they../
Abide...by the system, If there's anyone here that doesnt feel this flow please.../
List them....cause they'll be sent to detention, it shouldnt take a rhyme to grab the world's../
Attention...that world is really sick, and we were the virus that was the start of ..../
It and its never gonna commence, Because in our ill fated eyes the world is just a bunch of.../
Nonsense...irrelevant in fact who cares is unity is togetherness ../
Intact..Come together cause if we love than it can take away the clouds from any.../
Whether or not we approve, Its still our right to choose, the time we spare to.../
Lose cause that's all weve accomplished to do, For thousands of years until the thousandth year ..../
Two lives can start the peace but if the way we keep on goin our world will be..../

Deceased ..../

Rest in Peace Earth

upp

BMACK HIT ME UP NOW I GOT A VERSE LIKE THIS YOU GOT TO JUMP ON YOU CAPTURED THE TOPIC ESSENCE PERFECTLY

Rhyming/Flow
The Flow Was Good, NOt The Best I've Seen You Do..I KNow Your Capable Of Better, But Even So It Was Pretty Good...7/10

Vocab/Wordplay
You used A Good Array Of Words To Express The True Meaning Behind This Rather Morbid (lol) Topic. Good Wordplay In A lot Of places, So This Isn’t Something You need To Work On As You’ve Already Captured It...8/10

Concept/Topic
Nice Topic, You Played It out Well, Covered Alot of Aspects Of it: "Love, Hurt, Abide" etc... Nice...8/10

Overall
8/10, I Liked The Way You Had It Structured, The "Important" word If You Will, At The Beginning Of Each Bar, Was Really Hittin', Help Me Take Notice Of it.

Word!

yo that was tight fame keep doin your shit the stretched bars kinda threw me off but your wordplay helped it out