Lives are taken for supposed mistakes we must have made
For fantasy doesn’t become reality and dreams often fade

^^ those two lines just jumped out at me, they were nicely written, but this whole thing i found was very nicely written. you used alot of emotion to get your message across strong and clear. with tons and tons of great detail, and even more depth to it. Its a sad piece, but near the end, you start to relise that happyness will someday come, i like that ending more then a death ending. you used lots of references to everyday things to show how you feel which made it that much easier to understand what you are feeling. with simple parts in it that are so i dunno how to put it, strong in their way, but easy to relate to feelings, like

the farther i walk,
the longer the road gets,

you have a nice way of placing words so that it sounds very nice too. i really enjoyed this piece, i'll watch for some more!

~Tera~
DONT HATE

can you check out my piece, Cold hate, sometime.

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