Cold autumn day, Can’t think, my mind’s outta shape
All the anger inside doesn’t know how to escape
I try to hold back my tears just so I’ll be respected
Trying not to lose or be me, since my mind’s too infected
Emotions boiled up but have reached a point of now turning back
You came to me that cold autumn day with your rutheless attack
I never saw you in the way I did that cold stormy day
I’ll never forget how my heart got shattered by the sharp words you had to say
I get tired of all these worries and all this presure’s getting old
So I hold the knife real close thinkin I might have the strength to let you go
I know it’s stupid, since life is only temporary and death forever
But I don’t wonna resort to drugs or alcohol thinkin it can make my life better.
Lives are taken for supposed mistakes we must have made
For fantasy doesn’t become reality and dreams often fade
But I just feel it…. I know it’s you, … you are the one
I had my trial with you as a judge and now justice has been done
I know I don’t deserve it,… I don’t deserve your all
But without you everything seems so useless, I just can’t stand tall
now it’s time for me to see and to finally understand
That you ain’t gonna be there, reaching out your ever helpful hand
Everyday I awake without the strength and it all starts over…
I feel as if I can’t take all this pain with you, my sould is your marked-soldier
I feel alone on this walk of life, the struggles i face are as locks and weights on my feet,
the farther i walk,
the longer the road gets,
the weights get heavier with every breath.
I know one day i will find my happiness, not in thoughtless images or physical riches,
just another heart that has the same feelings.
The locks on these chains all have their keys,
as every tree must burden the falling of its leaves,
the harder we try, they harder it is to please,
when will we realize that while every chain has its slave,
there will always be an escape of love to be free.
Still…the questions i ponder, stay without your answers
Your eyes now wonder, my feelings are like cancer
Even face to face, you can’t look into my eyes
Like i have been erased, and have been living white lies
You got all your pain to be released, these lessons I’ve learned and got ‘em
I just pray to god that the cold has ceased so there will never be another autumn

Lives are taken for supposed mistakes we must have made
For fantasy doesn’t become reality and dreams often fade

^^ those two lines just jumped out at me, they were nicely written, but this whole thing i found was very nicely written. you used alot of emotion to get your message across strong and clear. with tons and tons of great detail, and even more depth to it. Its a sad piece, but near the end, you start to relise that happyness will someday come, i like that ending more then a death ending. you used lots of references to everyday things to show how you feel which made it that much easier to understand what you are feeling. with simple parts in it that are so i dunno how to put it, strong in their way, but easy to relate to feelings, like

the farther i walk,
the longer the road gets,

you have a nice way of placing words so that it sounds very nice too. i really enjoyed this piece, i'll watch for some more!

~Tera~
DONT HATE

can you check out my piece, Cold hate, sometime.

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this piece was nice...the title drew me in...i never seen a poem titled like this...nice read mos deff...you doin ya thing...you have a way with words...return the favor...THINKIN ABOUT WAR...STAY UP

^^ thanks fo honest comments to both of ya
filed, I appreciate ya nice reply, resp

uppin fo some feedback

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