I'm living a lie, each day is filled with broken promising
I pray to God but it's all seeped in hopeless dishonesty
He's on to me, secrets and lies are simply monotony
To me it's all the same, a life of sex, cash & pot you see
Is not for me, it's not like I'm afraid to kill or to die
I'm just scared that I might lie just one too many times
I've never let it show, but it's still killing me inside
No matter how many vows I just can't seem to comply

I'm trying to trade, all of the bullshit I've made
Want all my sins forgiven, I just want a fresh new slate
I'm trying to trade, all of the lies that I've made
To be good in God's eyes but I'm worthless as a slave...

I promised myself never again would I touch a cigarette
But as soon as I'm stressed, I just pretend to forget
Thinkin' I got a tough guy facade, I'm just tryin to impress
Bettin years from now sayin yes is somethin that I'll regret
Said I'm done pushin drugs on children in the community
But I keep dealin to kids who aint even gone through puberty
Sayin it's "cool" to see, these youngstas smokin tha Blu-burr-y
But they way too young why the fuck did I ruin they future dreams
I said never again will I hit another man
Next day I sent a punk spinnin like a ceilin fan
This dude talked too much smack, I said here's your warning
Didn't listen so I made like a typhoon and started storming
Late at night on my knees prayin to God imploring
"What if I neva threw a fist, would I still be here mourning?"
I wanted to visit was rejected but still offered yall
Cos I just wanted to say sorry I put you in the hospital

I'm trying to trade, all of the bullshit I've made
Want all my sins forgiven, I just want a fresh new slate
I'm trying to trade, all of the lies that I've made
To be good in God's eyes but I'm worthless as a slave...

3 deceits at once, beat the life outta a soldja
Whose name is now in the "death certificates" folder
That's right it's over, I'm so fuckin sorry neva shouda done it
Just thought if I got clappin and won I'd find it funny
But it wasn't, then makin deals utterin "...fine it's sold"
Never even stopped to think that this kid was 9 years old
Not only that, but I simply didn't wanna look wack so
I picked up that FAGGOT and sparked the tobacco
I know it's wrong, I've seen it firsthand, dying of cancer
But I can't do everything so tell me lord, what's my plan sir?

I'm trying to trade, all of the bullshit I've made
Want all my sins forgiven, I just want a fresh new slate
I'm trying to trade, all of the lies that I've made
To be good in God's eyes but I'm worthless as a slave...

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