6/10
no hate aight, nothin like that. It just seems like a topic that has been touched on quite a bit, although you did do a good job. It's just that often what is good, is something that is original and different, you understand? Think of new concepts, and take things in a different direction. But overall this was a decent piece, keep at it.
give me an honest feedback, on my first open mic [linked in my sig] read all of it (prolly not as long as yours, but i just want it to be read all the way, in stead of skimmed through and then spoken on)

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