I liked it actually, thought it was pretty decent, ok take on the topic, not the most original but it was decent, flow was a little choppy in a couple places, a few lines were felt, others needed wording a little better for impact e.g:
Quote:
the fact is,.. she sits for hours for a great conversation she devours.
Towers of flowers washed ashore as this beautiful rose showers.
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^ . . could of been dope but you kept referring to her in 3rd person, and that got a bit awry for me, all in all not a bad piece tough mayne, needed more internals and multi's actually to spice it up, but for whats there it was decent.
Dont hate. Its honest opinion and telling you how to improve, nothing personal.